Ann_theman19400

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Ann_theman19400

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  • Number of visits : 201
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Ann_theman19400's page activity

Visits<b>duckman9</b> - the 05/26/2016 at 4:02am

Fucked!<b>duckman9</b> - the 05/25/2016 at 11:53am

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Ann_theman19400's favorite FMLs

Today, I met with a student in office hours to discuss an assignment when my nose started bleeding. I didn't know at first, so I blew my nose and an inhuman amount of blood sprayed out the side of the tissue all over my desk, the wall, and the student's paper. It looked like a murder scene. FML

by the bleeder / 05/13/2016 at 1:05am / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out that if I take back my expensive headphones that my daughter constantly borrows, she will play porn on max volume, whether or not I have guests over. FML

Today, a weird guy approached me and started asking me many questions. I didn't know how to get out of this situation, so I suddenly ran away shouting, "Stranger danger! " I'm 21. FML

by foreveryoung / 04/30/2016 at 12:23pm / France / Miscellaneous

Today, while examining my busted nose in the mirror, I had a sneeze attack. Now it looks like someone got their throat slashed in my bathroom. FML

by jack the ripped / 04/30/2016 at 12:38am / United States / Health

Today, I rolled my ankle, got pink eye, and have the flu. Unable to stand long enough to cook myself a meal, I opted for delivery. When I opened the door for the delivery boy, he backed away frantically with his arms up upon seeing me. Apparently, I look just as shitty as I feel. FML

by Sick As Hell / 04/27/2016 at 3:22am / United States (Iowa) / Health

Today, a student pooped his pants in my office. I work with undergrad and graduate students. FML

by AcademicAdvisor / 04/25/2016 at 4:14pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Work

Today, my roommate's shopping addiction reached a whole new level. He bought a box of tampons just because they were 40% off. Yes, he. FML

by Roomie pay rent plz / 04/23/2016 at 9:25pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, my daughter had a vocabulary assignment. She had to find five new words in books and movies. She was watching Shrek, so her first word was "thong". FML

by Anonymous / 04/22/2016 at 8:33pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Kids

Today, I went to the local clinic and I met a really cute guy. We hit it off quite well, and he asked me out. It's like The Fault in Our Stars, but instead of cancer, we have STDs. FML

by dvddtraveller / 04/22/2016 at 5:25pm / United States (California) / Love

Today, while half asleep, I dipped my finger in ketchup instead of a fry, and bit down on it so hard I needed stitches. FML

by Dipping Tired / 04/20/2016 at 7:17pm / United States (New York) / Health

Today, I, a vampire-pale girl, went on a blind date with a very dark-skinned young man. We got on like a house on fire, and everything was going smoothly until we leant in for the kiss. I was wearing makeup and no setting spray. He came away with half his face smudged snow white. FML

by JJ / 03/21/2016 at 3:06pm / United Kingdom (Southampton) / Intimacy

Today, I got hit by a stray cantaloupe. That's not a typo. I hate my neighbors' kids with a burning passion. FML

by Anonymous / 02/28/2016 at 6:06am / United States (Tennessee) / Health

Today, I was so sleep deprived that while making instant oatmeal, I poured the oats into the garbage and put the empty packet in a bowl, then microwaved it for 2 minutes. FML

by Agamar / 02/23/2016 at 12:00am / United States (Illinois) / Health

Today, I had to console my bawling 6-year-old son and explain that his sister was lying when she told him that when boys in our family turn 13, they turn into girls. I'm not sure who disappoints me more right now. FML

by jts / 02/20/2016 at 4:55am / United States (North Carolina) / Kids

Today, the play I was directing opened. The curtain opened, and my lead actor and actress weren't prepared. I could tell from the looks on their faces as the whole audience saw him balls deep in her, doggy style, on stage. FML

by headinabag33 / 02/14/2016 at 8:57pm / United States (North Carolina) / Intimacy

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