AmexBlack

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Offline (the 05/21/2015 at 1:18pm)

AmexBlack

2Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Reading, United Kingdom
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Saturday 17 September 1994 (21 years old)
  • <3 status : Not so sure
  • Number of visits : 2167
  • Number of comments : 51
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

About AmexBlack : Currently a full-time English Literature student.

FML occupies my time when i'm not reading literature, listening to music, expanding my vinyl record collection, getting lashed (aka 'drunk' to you continentals) or writing essays...

AmexBlack's page activity

Visits<b>ahurst3</b> - the 06/19/2016 at 5:09am<b>lonelyincrowd</b> - the 06/14/2016 at 7:21pm<b>CthulhuSyd</b> - the 09/30/2015 at 12:43pm<b>Jiggy_J</b> - the 09/26/2015 at 3:47am<b>Fergud</b> - the 09/15/2015 at 8:30pm<b>fvmousmikey</b> - the 09/01/2015 at 9:26pm<b>Oihana</b> - the 07/31/2015 at 9:13pm<b>GodPart2</b> - the 07/26/2015 at 3:10pm<b>ronenlior</b> - the 07/13/2015 at 10:52am<b>captainwhiskers</b> - the 06/26/2015 at 2:40pm<b>pipmorris</b> - the 06/24/2015 at 3:18am<b>cribbin</b> - the 06/19/2015 at 7:40pm<b>tylercarolinex</b> - the 06/17/2015 at 5:23pm<b>chris_mates</b> - the 06/09/2015 at 10:16am<b>Hardley</b> - the 06/06/2015 at 4:20pm<b>BecauseIAmBatman</b> - the 06/06/2015 at 12:08pm<b>ElleHarding2701</b> - the 06/04/2015 at 6:12pm<b>Shep81</b> - the 01/01/2015 at 7:11pm

Fucked!<b>ahurst3</b> - the 06/19/2016 at 11:09am<b>Fergud</b> - the 09/16/2015 at 2:30am

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AmexBlack's favorite FMLs

Today, I found out my boyfriend stacks things on me while I sleep. Apparently his record is 4 pillows, a textbook, and the cat. FML

by Anonymous / 08/06/2009 at 7:11am / United States (California) / Animals

Today, my girlfriend sent me a naked picture of herself and I wish she hadn't. FML

by MisterSeth / 06/16/2009 at 9:44pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Intimacy

Today, I woke up fully clothed, trying to remember the night's events. I walk to the den to awkwardly ask my dad for a ride to my car and he points to the computer. A pic of me passed out on the bathroom floor is now our new wallpaper. My skirt was around my knees. He sent it to everyone we know. FML

by Anonymous / 05/28/2009 at 1:44pm / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was preparing a dinner for some business associates, in hopes of closing the deal on a promotion. I emailed them with the menu, in case there were any allergies. Hours later, I checked the email again to find that instead of serving the Roast Duck I would be serving the Roast Fuck. FML

by wordmalfunction / 05/25/2009 at 5:42pm / United Kingdom (London) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was supposed to catch a 4:40 flight to New York. My 5 year old son handed me my carry on bag as I left the house. Turns out he had put his older brother's BB gun into my bag to "keep me safe." I missed my flight after I was detained and strip-searched. FML

by sucksforme. / 05/10/2009 at 1:05am / Canada (Ontario) / Kids

Today, while working at a pizza shop near a college campus, I got an order to deliver to the dorms. Extremely busy at work and annoyed that someone wouldn't take 3 minutes to walk over, I spat on the pizza. When I arrived to the dorm, a woman in a wheelchair opened the door. FML

by pizzagurl / 05/09/2009 at 12:43am / United States (Georgia) / Work

Today, I was sitting next to the guy I like and he was doing homework. Then, he looks up, his eyes meeting mine. His smooth voice mutters my name as his face inches closer to mine. I can feel his minty breath against my face. My pulse is racing. Then, he says "What's a pronoun?" FML

by theatreismylife / 04/26/2009 at 9:14pm / United States (California) / Love

Today, when I was walking in to the grocery store, a van pulls up and a bunch of guys get out who look really drunk. I jokingly said to the sober-looking man who had driven the van "Sucks you have to be the designated driver!" Turns out the "Drunk" guys were actually mentally challenged. FML

by dummy441 / 04/20/2009 at 11:14pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was at a gay bar and asking a really convincing drag queen about her daily routine. I asked how she tucked her penis in. She responded, "Um, I'm a woman." I said, "Oh I'm sorry, are you pre-op or post-op?" She said, "No, I always have been and always will be a woman, asshole." FML

by thatwasmiz / 04/08/2009 at 2:38am / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous

Today, my husband of 9 years announced he was gay. He insinuated that he was only able to achieve erections because I looked like a man. FML

by jilted / 03/21/2009 at 3:15am / United States (Missouri) / Intimacy

Today, my girlfriend was driving me to her house against my will when I said, "Sometimes it's annoying that you always decide where we go because you drive." She replied, "Yeah, I wish I could be more of the girl in this relationship." FML

by lukey_G / 03/20/2009 at 1:08am / United States (California) / Love

Today, I finally got the courage to tell my best friend that I've had a crush on him since our junior year. Since I couldn't see him I shot him a text. His response: "Yeah I know. I've tried kind of ignoring it." FML

by Noname / 03/13/2009 at 3:27am / United States (Arizona) / Love

Today, I finally got up the nerve to ask this really cute girl out I've had a crush on for over eight months. Turns out she isn't a girl. FML

by goodbye / 03/08/2009 at 8:45pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love

Today, I was in spanish class, having a debate about the death penalty. When I went to make a point, I meant to say "La pena de muerte", which means "The death penalty". I said, "La pene de muerte". Turns out that means, "The penis of death". FML

by Señor Guapo / 03/04/2009 at 12:42pm / United States (Missouri) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was having sex with my wife when my 14 year old daughter from her room texts me, "Stop." FML

by dad / 03/03/2009 at 5:28pm / United States (Virginia) / Intimacy