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Alucard8307

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Alucard8307
  • Town/Country : Orlando
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 231
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About Alucard8307 : Names edgar :) I'm a gamer/streamer stream name is fallentears1993 I play mostly league of legends if u wanna kno more plz ask :D

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Alucard8307's favorite FMLs

Today, desperate for my boyfriend to notice me for once, I started noisily masturbating while he was playing World of Warcraft. His response was to put his headphones on. FML

#17811635
327 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36939) - you deserved it (10971)

On 09/23/2011 at 6:41am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my girlfriend called me over to her house. When I knocked, no one responded to the door. I decided to check the back yard and found her sunbathing by the pool. I kneeled by her and placed my hand on her butt, kissing her neck. What I heard next, "So this is what you do with my daughter." FML

#17753266
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29760) - you deserved it (17166)

On 09/15/2011 at 7:54pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada (Alberta)

Today, while at my boyfriend's house, my stomach began to hurt really badly, so I excused myself to take a shit. I let it all out. Later on, his dad went to the bathroom and yelled, "Goddamn son, what the hell did you do in here?!" FML

#17499822
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31068) - you deserved it (6408)

On 08/17/2011 at 12:40pm - misc - by EmbarrassedGirlfriend101 - United States

Today, I introduced my parrot to oranges. Now she makes a high pitched scream if I don't give her any, and I've just run out of oranges. FML

#17489385
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20762) - you deserved it (7738)

On 08/16/2011 at 11:00am - misc - by bursteardrums (woman) - United Kingdom (Devon)

Today, while having sex, my boyfriend decided to sing the Star Wars theme song as he entered his penis into me. FML

#17304826
302 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34596) - you deserved it (9281)

On 07/30/2011 at 1:14am - intimacy - by Taylor - United States (Texas)

Today, I woke up to a mosquito feeding on my morning wood; probably the only thing that will ever suck my penis. FML

#16277810
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52229) - you deserved it (7877)

On 05/21/2011 at 5:07am - intimacy - by no one - United States (Alaska)

Today, I got pulled over for going about 88mph. When the cop asked why I was speeding, I replied, "I was trying to go back in time". He didn't like that answer and gave me a ticket. FML

#16248002
219 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10448) - you deserved it (61178)

On 05/19/2011 at 1:30am - work - by 613tanner -

Today, I pretended to not be able to go out with a friend so I could hang with my boyfriend at the movies. When I sat down I received a text that said "turn around" it was her. FML

#16181891
201 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7797) - you deserved it (49076)

On 05/15/2011 at 1:20am - misc - by marmarr - United States

Today, my parents woke me up by pouring a glass of freezing cold water over my head. Their reason? They were 'bored'. FML

#16022547
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28217) - you deserved it (4308)

On 05/02/2011 at 7:00pm - misc - by missmirror (woman) - United Kingdom (Cambridgeshire)

Today, I ran a red light in front of a cop and got pulled over. My friend thought it would be funny to throw a knife in my lap and scream "Help me officer, he has a knife!" FML

#15773415
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38524) - you deserved it (5132)

On 04/13/2011 at 6:57pm - misc - by FrOsTy25 -

Today, I went into labor with my first child, and as much as I pleaded, I had to wait for my husband to finish his raid in World of Warcraft before he'd take me to the hospital. FML

#14093813
359 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59057) - you deserved it (8362)

On 12/05/2010 at 8:38am - health - by newmother (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I was out eating lunch with my parents when my mom complained that I eat too quickly and don't thoroughly chew my food. My dad exclaimed, "That's because she swallows!" FML

#13640932
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27512) - you deserved it (5104)

On 10/29/2010 at 7:15pm - intimacy - by Username - Sent from mobile version

Today, we were in the car with my puppy, who favours my sister. She had been sat on her lap for a while, when she stood up and climbed onto my lap. I was really pleased until she peed on me and then went straight back to my sister. FML

#13082882
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28090) - you deserved it (2860)

On 09/17/2010 at 2:30am - misc - by PuppyPeeTimee. - United Kingdom (Cambridgeshire)

Today, at a debate tournament based on domestic abuse, my partner yells out, "Has anyone considered that maybe the women DESERVED to be beaten?" FML

#9141842
254 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34934) - you deserved it (5523)

On 03/16/2010 at 8:46pm - misc - by Username - Sent from mobile version

Today, while taking a shower, I saw shadows moving across the curtains. The shadow turned out to be a cricket that then fell into the tub. I ran out of the bathroom screaming and naked. My little sister came to my door and said, "If I hadn't just seen your balls, I would swear mom had TWO daughters." FML

#6712676
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10273) - you deserved it (34791)

On 12/11/2009 at 8:03pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)



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