About AlstottsNo1Fan : Retired military. Into bass guitar, tattoos, and heavy music.
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AlstottsNo1Fan's favorite FMLs
Today, I was at orientation for my new job. There were only 6 other people in the training. Throughout the whole entire training, I kept smelling cat urine and moving further away from the other person. Only to get in my car and realize my cat peed in my purse. FML
Today, I accidentally farted in the middle of my grandfather's funeral and my cousin started cracking up. It caused a chain reaction of laughter throughout all of the other cousins and my siblings. Now my aunts won't speak to any of us. FML
by sillymink / 08/19/2016 at 10:06pm / United States / Miscellaneous
by nullpointer / 08/03/2016 at 12:38am / United States (California) / Animals
Today, I had to give an important presentation, so I checked it over one last time before taking a shower and heading out. I found out too late that my brother used that window of opportunity to replace the entire document with the N-word repeating over and over again. FML
by suspended / 07/31/2016 at 11:39am / United States (Michigan) / Work
by Anonymous / 07/16/2016 at 5:34am / Canada (Manitoba) / Work
by WellThatSucks / 05/23/2016 at 5:15am / United States / Animals
by Workplace woes / 05/12/2016 at 1:00pm / United States (California) / Health
by Joseflloyd / 05/12/2016 at 12:52am / United States (Colorado) / Love
Today, while being intimate with my future husband, I reached over to stroke his cheek. The light behind him cast a shadow over my chest, and it scared me so much, I screamed then I farted on him. FML
by Dramaqueenfornothing / 04/27/2016 at 6:32pm / South Africa (Western Cape) / Love
Today, I accidentally farted while on my flight home. It was silent but so deadly that several people were visibly distressed. The overweight guy sitting next to me got a bunch of dirty glares. I was too ashamed to own up to it. FML
by Anonymous / 12/18/2015 at 8:34am / Sri Lanka (Western) / Transportation
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