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Alpaca_BAMF

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Alpaca_BAMF

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2493
  • Number of comments : 13
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Alpaca_BAMF's page activity

Visits<b>lfgiraffe</b> - the 03/03/2014 at 1:39pm<b>BirdieCurls</b> - the 01/21/2014 at 8:43pm<b>jane00</b> - the 12/02/2013 at 10:31pm<b>Robbieisadowg</b> - the 11/09/2013 at 6:53pm<b>ohdannyboyy</b> - the 09/16/2013 at 7:35pm<b>flames57323</b> - the 07/29/2013 at 9:26pm<b>haylburg</b> - the 07/23/2013 at 10:58pm<b>jadeluv</b> - the 07/17/2013 at 4:10am<b>TourettesGuyFTW</b> - the 07/16/2013 at 6:23am<b>Batgirl124</b> - the 07/08/2013 at 9:45am<b>ArtinHopar</b> - the 07/07/2013 at 12:02pm<b>downzi104</b> - the 07/07/2013 at 3:28am<b>Faith13</b> - the 07/02/2013 at 7:39pm<b>KiddNYC1O</b> - the 07/02/2013 at 2:54pm<b>RZW</b> - the 06/30/2013 at 1:53pm<b>sparkin</b> - the 06/28/2013 at 2:53pm<b>elmassapilo</b> - the 06/28/2013 at 12:49pm<b>xXHollowIchigoXx</b> - the 06/28/2013 at 8:03am

Alpaca_BAMF's FML badges

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

It’s in the can

Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

See all of Alpaca_BAMF's badges

Alpaca_BAMF's favorite FMLs

Today, I caught my dog chewing on a tampon applicator. I tried to grab it from him, but he wanted to play "keep away" and ran outside. Like a dumbass, I chased after him in my underwear, earning myself the attention of my neighbors on each side of my driveway. FML

#20408937
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10216) - you deserved it (28333)

On 12/20/2012 at 1:17pm - misc - by ScoozieBooze (woman) - United States (New Mexico)

Today, my boyfriend told me his Christmas gift to me was custom made. I told my parents in excitement, thinking it could possibly be a ring. Half an hour later he told me what it was; a molded dildo of his penis. It's going to be an awkward conversation with my parents when they ask what I got. FML

#20408274
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38877) - you deserved it (14074)

On 12/20/2012 at 12:30am - intimacy - by djl (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I announced to my coworkers that I'd "fixed the massive problem" they'd all been complaining about. Eleven different people made guesses at what the problem had been, ranging from how bad I smell to if I had learned to brush my teeth. I just meant that I'd fixed the coffee machine. FML

#20201213
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18292) - you deserved it (7650)

On 12/11/2012 at 10:50pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I smiled at a new kid and started a conversation with him, just to be nice. He later sent me 24 messages describing how strong his love for me is. I'm scared to go to school tomorrow. FML

#20200101
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29913) - you deserved it (3285)

On 12/11/2012 at 3:39am - love - by you're just creepy. - Canada (Yukon Territory)

Today, my boss was telling everyone that he knew a guy who went to a college at which multiple people were shot and killed recently. Being extremely socially awkward and uncomfortable, I blurted, "That's awesome." Now everyone in the office is terrified of me. FML

#20191114
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10911) - you deserved it (20984)

On 12/04/2012 at 4:34pm - work - by Adan - United States (Washington)

Today, while at work taking notes on a pad of paper, my boss witnessed me trying to scroll down on the paper, as if it was a touch-screen phone. FML

#20190845
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6372) - you deserved it (26478)

On 12/04/2012 at 12:16pm - work - by mdg (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, my dog climbed onto the dining room table to eat the cat's food. Then whined until I showed him how to get down. He does this every night. My dog is a genius. FML

#20171812
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16173) - you deserved it (4366)

On 11/21/2012 at 12:00am - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, I awoke in the midst of the night to find my half-naked dad drunkenly arguing with the microwave. FML

#20168543
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18630) - you deserved it (1496)

On 11/18/2012 at 7:47pm - misc - by mountains - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, the father of my unborn child told me he isn't sure he'll be able to make it to the birth, since there's no guarantee of when it will happen, so he can't schedule time off. This would be understandable if he actually had a job. FML

#20158967
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22431) - you deserved it (5589)

On 11/11/2012 at 1:50pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, while at work, a customer gave me a $20 tip. I explained to him we aren't allowed to accept tips, but he insisted. When I called the manager to report it, he pocketed my tip. FML

#20157115
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12829) - you deserved it (26737)

On 11/10/2012 at 2:23am - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I overheard my mom talking on the phone with my sister about how much they hate my fiancé. My wedding is in two weeks and my family has been pretending to like my future husband for three years. FML

#20148569
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19949) - you deserved it (1691)

On 11/05/2012 at 6:36am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I'm at home, sick with walking pneumonia and a raging UTI. Every time I cough, I piss myself. I'm now having to lie on a bath towel and garbage bags until the meds kick in. FML

#20145285
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21709) - you deserved it (1372)

On 11/03/2012 at 1:34am - health - by jdch_99 - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I finally lost my virginity to my boyfriend. It hurt like hell, was over in less than a minute, and he tried to reuse the condom for a second round. FML

#20144932
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36729) - you deserved it (5384)

On 11/02/2012 at 9:23pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Nova Scotia)

Today, my coworker and I were sitting and eating lunch. We noticed a little kid kept staring at us, and every time we looked away he would come a little bit closer. When he was right behind us, I looked and was startled enough to jump. The parents were three tables down laughing uncontrollably. FML

#20136682
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20342) - you deserved it (3186)

On 10/28/2012 at 8:29am - work - by radioinvader (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my fiancé's stepfather asked me how my teaching job was going. I replied heatedly that I've never taught, and then complained bitterly to my fiancé about how his family still doesn't know me. Turns out his stepfather has early onset dementia, and that I'm an asshole. FML

#20129656
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8506) - you deserved it (30920)

On 10/23/2012 at 9:29am - misc - by inthefamily (woman) - United States (District of Columbia)



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