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Allornone

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Allornone

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3630
  • Number of comments : 102
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About Allornone : "I know i was born; I know that I'll die... -vedder

Allornone's page activity

Visits<b>Much2Much4U</b> - the 12/15/2014 at 3:08am<b>kfchicken</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 7:37pm<b>SquidgyOmAm</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 3:24pm<b>AnonymousUser90</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 12:48pm<b>Raleaf</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 10:35am<b>shadow_heart_13</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 3:42am<b>1PersonIsMyWorld</b> - the 12/10/2014 at 11:56pm<b>Door_Productions</b> - the 12/09/2014 at 1:54am<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 12/08/2014 at 6:17pm<b>missblue97</b> - the 12/08/2014 at 3:33am<b>boring_boredom</b> - the 12/07/2014 at 11:26pm<b>badcar</b> - the 12/07/2014 at 9:53pm<b>GuessWut</b> - the 12/07/2014 at 9:49pm<b>elissak</b> - the 12/07/2014 at 8:17pm<b>ClockworkPoleaxe</b> - the 11/24/2014 at 1:02am<b>17031990</b> - the 11/21/2014 at 4:06am<b>DARKDAY07</b> - the 11/21/2014 at 12:30am<b>wilburhp</b> - the 11/14/2014 at 3:47am

Allornone's FML badges

100 kick ass comments

100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!

50 quality responses

Clicking reply to a comment is a worthy thing to do. To do so without getting buried is even better.

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

See all of Allornone's badges

Allornone's favorite FMLs

Today, I found out my little sister is a pyromaniac. She set my bed on fire. FML

#8775610
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24573) - you deserved it (2270)

On 03/02/2010 at 4:16pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, feeling down and dejected because of the shitty weather and none of my friends or family wanting to spend time with me to feel loved I took my favorite stuffed animal and that says 'I love you' when you squeeze it. I squeezed it. Nothing happened. Even an inanimate object rejected me. FML

#8699451
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25833) - you deserved it (6156)

On 02/27/2010 at 8:32pm - love - by dejected (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I found my boyfriend making out with my mom. FML

#7490494
263 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65622) - you deserved it (4238)

On 01/22/2010 at 12:02am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Nevada)

Today, after months of trying, my wife of seven years told me she is finally pregnant. I'm going to be an uncle. FML

#7189298
213 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63023) - you deserved it (3137)

On 01/06/2010 at 10:17pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I found a pair of glasses in my car. I don't wear glasses, and nobody besides myself has been in my car lately. It appears that someone has been sleeping in my car and forgot their glasses. FML

#6836153
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23382) - you deserved it (2908)

On 12/19/2009 at 9:40pm - misc - by chrono64 (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, during a review session for a botany class, I began to space out. Then, I started to go, "beep, beep, beep, beep." I stopped when I noticed the entire class staring at me as if I were insane. This was not the first time this had happened. FML

#6691073
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8046) - you deserved it (31622)

On 12/10/2009 at 4:29am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I pretended to smoke a bread stick that looked like a cigar. It made me feel cool. FML

#6644782
12 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10225) - you deserved it (35777)

On 12/07/2009 at 1:06am - misc - by CH (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I found out my diet and exercise plan wasn't nearly as effective when it comes to weight loss as I had originally thought. It turns out what really accounts for all the weight I've been losing is tape worms. FML

#6630317
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31267) - you deserved it (2703)

On 12/06/2009 at 4:16am - health - by wormsick (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I spoke with my boyfriend's crazy ex-girlfriend. Actually, she isn't all that crazy. He really did cheat on her with half a dozen other girls. The same girls he's apparently cheating on me with. How do I know for sure? Thank you crazy ex for his email passwords. FML

#6521538
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41694) - you deserved it (4540)

On 11/29/2009 at 9:06pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I met my wife's other husband. FML

#6436745
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39329) - you deserved it (3071)

On 11/24/2009 at 3:20pm - intimacy - by bmonehh (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I had to take a dump. While looking for a book to read, I sneezed. The force of the sneeze caused me to shit my pants. The glob of dung then ran down my leg before falling out of my shorts onto my carpet, all in less than 5 seconds. Nothing in my life has prepared me for this. FML

#5828114
223 comments

I agree, your life sucks (87773) - you deserved it (14676)

On 10/14/2009 at 1:01pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I came home from work and found my house egged, and bricks thrown through my windows. I called the police, and submitted a report. Later that night, I heard the doorbell ring. Nobody was at the house, but there was a note saying "Sorry, wrong house". FML

#5579779
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40071) - you deserved it (1857)

On 10/01/2009 at 2:43am - misc - by egged (man) - Singapore - moderated by Kevin Nealon

Today, the weird receptionist at the hotel I'm staying at asked me if I needed an extra blanket because I "looked cold in my sleep last night". FML

#5443972
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62082) - you deserved it (2563)

On 09/24/2009 at 5:50am - misc - by scaredtosleep (man) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, while my girlfriend and I were getting it on, she suddenly stopped and yelled "STOP!". I stopped, scared I'd hurt her. She then yelled "HAMMER TIME!" and started to dance. We never finished. FML

#5286193
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28312) - you deserved it (5061)

On 09/16/2009 at 1:19am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, my girlfriend left me for her boss. The same boss that, two weeks ago, caused her to come to me crying because he was sexually harassing her at work. When I told her I'd intervene, she told me she'd handle it. I guess she certainly did. FML

#5192617
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37531) - you deserved it (1958)

On 09/11/2009 at 7:27pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (North Carolina)



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