Alie22

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Alie22

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 870
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Alie22 : My name is Allison. thats all you need to know about me.

Alie22's page activity

Visits<b></b> - the 01/10/2011 at 11:46pm<b>Freeze</b> - the 02/11/2010 at 10:35pm

Alie22's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

Alie22's favorite FMLs

Today, while showering, I finished off the shampoo bottle. I decided to see if I could shoot it into the trash can over the shower curtain. When I heard the successful "thunk", I got so excited I slipped and cracked my head open. FML

by bobuhbeartoe / 08/24/2009 at 12:36am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went on a plane and was sitting next to a mom with her 12-year old daughter. Apparently, they decided to have "the talk." On the plane, right next to me. I heard everything, and actually learned new things. I'm 35. FML

by airplanes-suck / 08/20/2009 at 8:20pm / United States (Florida) / Transportation

Today, I went on a plane and was sitting next to a mom with her 12-year old daughter. Apparently, they decided to have "the talk." On the plane, right next to me. I heard everything, and actually learned new things. I'm 35. FML

by airplanes-suck / 08/20/2009 at 8:20pm / United States (Florida) / Transportation

Today, I needed new business cards so I went to design and print some. After I designed, I was happy with them and printed off 100 copies. I live at a place called Canal Rocks. I forgot the 'C'. I now have 76 business cards which say 'anal rocks.' I already distributed 24. FML

by Anonymous / 08/20/2009 at 9:23am / Australia (Western Australia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was having sex with my husband. As I was undressing, he said, "Arr, I spy me some booty!" I let it go, I'm used to his embarassing pirate talk. But as he orgasmed, he screamed, "I'VE FOUND THE BURIED TREASURE!" My neighbors heard in the apartment next door and called to let me know. FML

by piratequeen / 08/07/2009 at 1:39pm / United States (Mississippi) / Intimacy

Today, my mother woke me up by saying "Good morning my sexually aggressive daughter. We're going to have an extremely uncomfortable conversation today." Our awkward talk consisted of her telling me that I'm a tease and am going to get raped. Why? She caught me making out with my boyfriend. FML

by wildthing / 07/01/2009 at 3:33pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy

Today, I had sex with a new guy. After we were done, he noticed my lighter on my nightstand and said "I've always wanted to try that!" He put the lighter by his butt and fart into it, producing a flame. After, when he left, I sat there, naked, mortified. FML

by FMLFMLFMLFML / 05/29/2009 at 1:52pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, I had a very intense sexual dream that made me come and left me panting when I woke up. It was the best orgasm I'd ever had. The trouble was, it wasn't about a hot girl, or anything sexy. It was about bacon. FML

by wtfdreams / 05/17/2009 at 8:33am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, my parents punished me and made me wash my mouth out with soap for cursing. I'm almost 19. I said the word "hell". FML

by jdsksoapy / 03/30/2009 at 4:16pm / United States / Miscellaneous