![[fr]](http://cdn1.fmylife.com/fmylife/images/flag_fr_hover.gif)
![[it]](http://cdn3.fmylife.com/fmylife/images/flag_it_hover.gif)
![[es2]](http://cdn2.fmylife.com/fmylife/images/flag_es2_hover.gif)
![[tr]](http://cdn3.fmylife.com/fmylife/images/flag_tr_hover.gif)
![[de]](http://cdn4.fmylife.com/fmylife/images/flag_de_hover.gif)
![[ru]](http://cdn1.fmylife.com/fmylife/images/flag_ru_hover.gif)
![[se]](http://cdn3.fmylife.com/fmylife/images/flag_se_hover.gif)
About Acousticpixie14 : My name is Kylie and I could say anything I wanted to right here, and you would never know if I were lying or not.
There are 3 reasons I grace the FML comments with my presence:
1) I like to argue.
2) I'm a bit perverted.
3) I thoroughly enjoy yelling at people who are a) rude, b) stupid, c) whiners.
Seriously, don't talk to me unless you have something worthwhile to say.
Shitty reasons to send me a message:
1) You think I have pretty eyes
2) You think I'm pretty
3) You want to try out your newest pick up line.
I'm married and I'm not interested.
Up and coming moderator
It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.
Perfectionist
Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.
Beginner
You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.
TODAY, I PRESSED CAPS LOCK ON MY LAPTOP AND THE KEY GOT STUCK. NOW ALL OF MY LETTERS ARE IN CAPITAL LETTERS. I HAVE TRIED EVERYTHING. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27624) - you deserved it (23804)
On 03/21/2011 at 1:32pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Wiltshire)
Today, I took a picture of myself and put it on Facebook. After I did so, I realized that in the background, you can see my crush's Facebook page up on my laptop. He tagged himself. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12050) - you deserved it (33301)
On 02/24/2011 at 7:37pm - misc - by verasam01 (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I went out for pizza with my boyfriend. He loaned me his debit card and loudly announced in front of everyone that his pin code was the numerical equivalent of "Fart", and repeated it twice, just in case I hadn't heard. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16888) - you deserved it (2591)
On 02/14/2011 at 2:14am - misc - by datingamoron (woman) - United States (Washington)
Today, I put up an ad on Craig's List to find a best friend. I don't know what's more pathetic: looking for a best friend online, or the ad being removed almost instantly. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8584) - you deserved it (18115)
On 02/13/2011 at 4:06pm - misc - by Username - United States (Texas)
Today, I cleaned up my dog's crap after my wife asked me. 5 minutes later she yelled at me for being lazy as she slammed the door leaving for work. My dog shit in the exact same spot apparently to make me look stupid. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25454) - you deserved it (2308)
On 02/12/2011 at 9:17pm - animals - by Username - United States (Kentucky)
Today, I made the discovery that I'm in a true love triangle; both of my girlfriends are dating one another. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10107) - you deserved it (40950)
On 02/12/2011 at 11:52am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)
Today, my mom left me at home with a babysitter. I'm 17. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27995) - you deserved it (3694)
On 02/11/2011 at 10:10pm - misc - by allgrowedup - United States (Texas)
Today, I realized that as a result of working in an office which has an oddly-placed window, the direct sunlight has caused the left side of my face to become significantly darker than the right. Just call me Harvey Dent. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20782) - you deserved it (2461)
On 02/11/2011 at 1:15pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, I opened my car door on reaching destination and my dog escaped. I never found him. My destination was the vet's office to get him micro-chipped. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26747) - you deserved it (3987)
On 02/11/2011 at 4:02am - animals - by Jen -
Today, I learned that ham is part of a pig, and not a completely different animal. I'm eighteen. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5371) - you deserved it (41226)
On 02/10/2011 at 5:37pm - misc - by acab93 - United States (Texas)
Today, while in my room sleeping, my little brother deemed it necessary to come in and drop a book on my face. When I sat up with a now bloody nose, he looked at me, pointed, and said "You've just been facebooked" and ran away giggling. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34589) - you deserved it (6214)
On 02/02/2011 at 12:57am - kids - by Malakai - United States
Today, I received a text message from my wife who had gone out for the evening with some girlfriends: "Have to take a friend home, she's drunk! I'll be staying at his place. Call you tomorrow morning." His? FML
I agree, your life sucks (36105) - you deserved it (2990) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 01/30/2011 at 1:21am - love - by Anonymous - Sent from mobile version
Today, my cat died while walking around the kitchen. He had a heart attack when the toaster popped out two slices of bread. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37169) - you deserved it (2841) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
Today, I was doing my grocery shopping, absent-mindedly wondering if my new diet was working. I got my answer when my panties fell down around my ankles. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16955) - you deserved it (5561)
On 01/26/2011 at 12:44pm - misc - by knickersdontfit (woman) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, my cat pissed in my zen garden. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9649) - you deserved it (14422)
On 01/26/2011 at 9:48am - animals - by lizzy1843 - United States (Pennsylvania)
The website: FML t-shirts -
Love - Animals - Money - Kids - Work - Health - Intimacy - Miscellaneous - Members
RSS feeds: 
Follow the FML 
Follow the FML blog Follow the FML comments
Go on the road: BlackBerry - Android - iPhone/iPod Touch - Windows Phone 7 - Mobile version
Give stuff to people: FML book - FML t-shirts
