ASP6

Search for a member

ASP6

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 426
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in their description.

ASP6's FML badges

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

ASP6's favorite FMLs

Today, I saw my dad pick his teeth with a toothpick from a new box. He ate the food he got out of his teeth and put the toothpick back. FML

by Anonymous / 09/06/2013 at 7:55am / United States (Kentucky) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was asked by my neighbor to stop jogging in our neighborhood because he keeps catching his son whacking off while watching me. His son is 28 years old and still lives at home. I'm 18. FML

by whatjusthappened / 09/05/2013 at 8:46pm / United States (Ohio) / Intimacy

Today, I'm a police officer who had the honor of arresting my girlfriend of 3 months for prostitution. All of my coworkers at the station know her and won't stop giving me judging looks. FML

by single again / 09/05/2013 at 8:29pm / United States (California) / Love

Today, after my grandma did some early Halloween costume shopping, I witnessed her modeling a "sexy nurse" outfit. After seeing her bare thighs and most of her ass, I don't think I can eat cottage cheese ever again. FML

by fuck my liBLARGHSLJNAdlajdSzxz / 09/05/2013 at 12:39pm / Sweden (Stockholms Lan) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend took me to a very elegant and expensive restaurant to celebrate our anniversary. When it came to the check, I volunteered to pitch in half, which he rejected by saying "I got it". Little did I know was that "I got it" was short for "I got your credit card". FML

by IGOTIT / 09/05/2013 at 3:24am / United States (California) / Transportation

Today, I finally got up the courage to talk to my four-year boyfriend about how insecure I've been feeling in our relationship recently, and how I needed his support while I try to get my self-esteem back on-track. He fell asleep mid-conversation. FML

by Anonymous / 09/05/2013 at 2:47am / United Kingdom (Warrington) / Miscellaneous

Today, I realized that I have a rack and butt most girls would be jealous of. That wouldn't be bad if I wasn't a dude. FML

Today, I ended up taking a massive dump after being constipated for a while. I thought I was alone, so I pretended I was giving birth to my turd, and let out all kinds of sound effects. Next thing I know, I hear a knock at the door and my mom asking, "Should I call 911?" FML

by ugh / 09/03/2013 at 7:53pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Health

Today, my boyfriend blamed me for his affair, because apparently I "should have made it clear to him" not to have sex with other people. FML

by yourfault / 09/02/2013 at 11:10am / United Kingdom (Kingston upon Thames) / Intimacy

Today, I brought my Japanese girlfriend home for dinner with my family for the first time. They all got drunk and made heaps of racist jokes right in front of us. My dad forgot her name and started calling her "Rice Ball" instead. FML

by Thanks everyone / 08/28/2013 at 6:35pm / Australia (Queensland) / Love

Today, half-way through my trip to Florida, I received a call from my friend of six years. "I sort of had sex with your girlfriend while you were gone." He said it "just sort of happened." FML

by Anonymous / 08/26/2013 at 4:17pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend and I are on camping vacation. On my way out of the tent, I stepped in a pile of shit. When I told him, he said, "Oh, I couldn't make it to the bathroom last night." The bathroom was a minute walk from our tent. FML

by justash12 / 08/25/2013 at 5:13am / United States (New Jersey) / Love

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was playing Charades with my boyfriend's family. When it was his turn, he pointed at me. His mother said "Bitch?" The answer was "relationship". FML

by Embarrassed / 08/22/2013 at 12:40am / United States (Massachusetts) / Love

Today, I was told that I looked like a Kardashian by a total stranger. Flattered, I asked which one. His response? "I don't know, the ugly one." FML

by theuglyone / 08/21/2013 at 11:00pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, as I was walking downstairs to get breakfast, I saw my parents had decided to have a quickie on the couch. I had to awkwardly stand out of sight on the stairs, too scared to go down, or even back up, because our stairs creak. FML

by Stinkipinkki / 08/21/2013 at 12:27pm / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.