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ALEX920

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ALEX920

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  • Number of visits : 1743
  • Number of comments : 32
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

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ALEX920's page activity

Visits<b>ItsAlly</b> - the 08/26/2014 at 5:10am<b>Zory7</b> - the 03/08/2014 at 6:51pm<b>NickPowers55</b> - the 01/17/2014 at 12:29am<b>RavenRoth</b> - the 07/03/2013 at 4:24pm<b>m1grannd</b> - the 04/30/2013 at 7:30am<b>MetalFish</b> - the 09/19/2010 at 7:43pm

ALEX920's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

ALEX920's favorite FMLs

Today, I was trying to wiggle my boxer shorts off to get it on with my girlfriend when my knee hooked on the elastic band. I was anxious to get started, so I used force and ended up kneeing my girlfriend in the crotch. FML

#4151663
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13219) - you deserved it (45326)

On 07/30/2009 at 1:46am - intimacy - by solomantis (man) - Norway (Oslo) - moderated by the Jackass crew

Today, I ran into an old student of mine at the grocery store. She didn't recognize me at first so I introduced myself as her old teacher. She looked taken aback for a moment, and then said, "Oh my God... you're still alive?" FML

#3141332
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52897) - you deserved it (3954)

On 06/23/2009 at 7:31am - misc - by feelinblue (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I was on a blind date with a girl my friend set me up with. We went to a fancy restaurant and she ordered the shrimp. I told her, "I'm allergic to shrimp, so you shouldn't order it in case I want to kiss you later." She looked at the waiter and said, "I'll have the shrimp." FML

#621353
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61852) - you deserved it (31973)

On 03/26/2009 at 1:11pm - love - by johnfrank (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I went to the doctor with my parents. When the doctor asked if I was sexually active, I said 'Yes.' My mom laughed and said 'Good one.' My dad, for added effect said, 'Your hand doesn't count.' FML

#99885
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62578) - you deserved it (6432)

On 02/21/2009 at 10:16pm - intimacy - by Nails (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I looked on my sister's phone. There was a text from her boyfriend: "Let's go camping again, I bought more condoms so we won't make a big mess this time." Last time they went camping, they borrowed my sleeping bag. FML

#43502
27 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67572) - you deserved it (6995)

On 02/14/2009 at 7:38pm - misc - by NeverCampingAgain (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was talking to my parents about feeling insecure with my "beach body" as Spring Break keeps getting closer and closer. My dad warned me by saying, "Don't wear a gray swimsuit. People will try to roll you back into the ocean". FML

#38789
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48079) - you deserved it (7820)

On 02/13/2009 at 7:15pm - misc - by Shamu (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my husband found the box my morning after pill came in. He had a vasectomy 10 years ago. FML

#18272
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32744) - you deserved it (442849)

On 02/09/2009 at 7:46pm - intimacy - by apricot (woman) - United Kingdom (Birmingham)



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