About AFur : I am a gay fur from the great state of Colorado.... I'm an Atheist and a misanthrope. After being on this site for a while I'm starting to reconsider hate for humanity.
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AFur's favorite FMLs
Today, I finally got the courage to make a move on the guy I've been crushing on. I asked him if he would like to go see a movie with me. He answered, "Sorry, I've already seen it." I didn't even mention any particular movie. FML
by Anonymous / 05/09/2013 at 3:01am / United States / Love
Today, my husband tried to annoy me by slurping on his almost-finished drink. I yelled at him to knock it off. Later, our daughter told her class that mommy and daddy had been fighting about his drinking during breakfast. FML
by Anonymous / 04/24/2013 at 2:49pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Kids
Today, I told the guy I've liked since we were children that I'm madly in love with him. He replied with, "Aw, I love you too, as a sister." I was speechless. He patted me on the back and said, "Better luck next time." FML
by Anonymous / 04/18/2013 at 7:08pm / United States (New York) / Love
Today, I picked my 12-year-old daughter up from school after her first sexual education lecture. She burst into tears on the way home explaining her fears of being pregnant with her boyfriend's child. As if that doesn't sound bad enough, I've met her boyfriend before. He is imaginary. FML
by anonymous / 04/04/2013 at 6:52pm / United States (California) / Kids
Today, my son asked me if the short films I write are for little kids or for adults. Since I write horror-filled films, I said it was for adults. He went and told his teacher that I made "adult films". FML
by Laila / 02/20/2013 at 7:01am / United States / Kids
by Anonymous / 01/18/2013 at 5:50am / United States / Intimacy
Today, I went out for dinner with my long-term crush, who turned out to be a huge dog person. He asked me which dog breed I like the most. In an attempt to reply with both Labrador and Doberman, I accidentally said Dumbledore. FML
by Anonymous / 01/10/2013 at 7:20am / Slovakia / Miscellaneous
by ugh / 01/08/2013 at 8:01pm / United States (Michigan) / Kids
by gassy / 12/29/2012 at 4:32am / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 10/25/2012 at 5:58am / South Africa (Western Cape) / Love
by anonymous / 10/09/2012 at 1:53am / United States / Kids
Today, after a great first date, he leaned in to kiss me. I held my breath slightly. This resulted in me breathing out through my nose, blowing a huge snot bubble, which then burst on his face. He looked at me in horror and walked away. FML
by stoych / 10/08/2012 at 3:14am / United Kingdom / Love
Today, I came home from a three day vacation to find my psycho ex-girlfriend in my house. Even though I broke up with her six months ago, she hasn't broken up with me. It's alright though, she says she's going to forgive me and she already moved her stuff in when I was out of town. FML
by BusinessTurtle / 10/06/2012 at 3:49am / United States (Iowa) / Love
Today, I was trying to convince my flatmate to agree to let me get us a kitten. After gushing about how cute they are, and showing her loads of pictures, she just stared at me and said, "You really need a penis inside you now and again." FML
by foreveralone / 09/24/2012 at 7:12pm / United Kingdom (Cardiff) / Intimacy
Today, I was sitting at a bus stop reading a book when out of the corner of my eye I spotted a middle-aged lady in a leopard-skin coat stumble up to me. She stopped, belched twice, and unleashed a torrent of red wine colored vomit onto my bag. It was 8:45 am. FML
by Anonymous / 09/11/2012 at 9:32am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
- Today, I realized that due to my anti-depressants, I can no longer orgasm. At. All. Which depresses… Today, at my wedding, my husband stood up to give a speech. It started out beautiful, until he told… Today, I overheard a conversation between my boyfriend and his best friend about how to shave one's…
- Today, I met the man of my dreams. Hot, funny, smart, sensitive, he guesses at what I need before I… Today my manager tried to force me to sign an employee contract (I've worked here a year) that she… Today, I screamed so hard during a nightmare that I developed Laryngitis. I work in a call center.…