AFloppyWetWhale

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AFloppyWetWhale

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Saturday 27 June 1998 (17 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 557
  • Number of comments : 50
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 12 posted

About AFloppyWetWhale : I love lacrosse, Modern Warfare 2, and laughing until I cry.

AFloppyWetWhale's page activity

Visits<b>swervelol</b> - the 04/18/2016 at 6:11pm<b>ananicosia</b> - the 02/07/2016 at 5:37am<b>SorrowsReward</b> - the 02/03/2016 at 2:52pm<b>shmoooopie</b> - the 10/18/2015 at 10:30pm<b>facelick</b> - the 08/02/2015 at 12:36pm<b>BeautifulLiesx</b> - the 03/20/2015 at 7:06pm<b>savannahkitty</b> - the 03/13/2015 at 2:22am<b>clairesucks</b> - the 03/05/2015 at 7:39am<b>nevm</b> - the 12/04/2014 at 9:44pm<b>roxxyfoxxy3</b> - the 10/27/2014 at 12:49am<b>Kewl_Kat</b> - the 08/26/2014 at 9:41pm<b>omgpp</b> - the 08/10/2014 at 1:33am<b>Stegosaurus314</b> - the 07/27/2014 at 2:53pm<b>TH3PRIC3I5RIGHT</b> - the 05/19/2014 at 12:16am<b>Thejackel79</b> - the 04/17/2014 at 12:48pm<b>BrandyFaye</b> - the 04/10/2014 at 9:23pm<b>ifunyy</b> - the 03/28/2014 at 12:12am<b>goldengirlsfan</b> - the 03/27/2014 at 3:31pm

Fucked!<b>savannahkitty</b> - the 03/13/2015 at 7:23am

AFloppyWetWhale's FML badges

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

See all of AFloppyWetWhale's badges

AFloppyWetWhale's favorite FMLs

Today, I was going so slow in traffic that my GPS asked me if I wanted to switch to pedestrian mode. FML

by anonymous / 07/24/2013 at 9:31pm / United States (Illinois) / Transportation

Today, my 13-year-old daughter and I went to a tropical themed restaurant. She wanted a strawberry Daiquiri, so I asked the waitress for a virgin strawberry Daiquiri. My daughter then said, "But dad, I'm not a virgin." FML

by Anonymous / 07/11/2013 at 10:24am / United States / Intimacy

Today, I got a message from my brother on Facebook that read, "They're watching you." This wouldn't have been such a big deal if he hadn't been dead for two years. FML

by Wtf / 07/10/2013 at 1:24am / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, I made two cakes. One for my boyfriend's birthday tomorrow, the other for my family so they wouldn't eat the birthday cake. I came home to find they ate half of each. FML

Today, while leaving McDonald's, I threw a fry out the window to a flock of seagulls. I watched in the rear-view mirror as it landed in the opposite lane and about 60 winged rats descended upon the street, causing a truck to veer off the road and crash. FML

by John / 07/09/2013 at 10:48pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I took my cat to the vet. The creepy vet looked me in the eyes and said, "This isn't the only pussy I'll be checking out today." FML

by o_O / 06/23/2013 at 1:26pm / United States (Kentucky) / Miscellaneous

Today, after dating for almost a year, I decided to introduce my parents to the man I was sure I'd fallen in love with. When dad saw him, his and my boyfriend's face completely dropped. I asked them what was wrong because I could feel the discomfort. Turns out, I'm dating my dad's drug dealer. FML

by explanations / 06/14/2013 at 2:48am / United States (Illinois) / Love

Today, I was using a public toilet, when someone in the next stall reached under, grabbed at my low-hanging toilet paper and pulled at it at an insane speed, whispering some kind of weird chant. Then he suddenly stopped, screamed, and ran out. What the hell happened in there? FML

by Anonymous / 06/13/2013 at 12:01pm / United States (Minnesota) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was delivering pizza. When I went up to the front door, an elderly lady answered. She was wearing a floral dress that went down to her shins and had a Nicolas Cage mask on with eye holes cut out. When I glanced behind her, I saw her cats had them too. FML

by nicholascageonyourface / 06/09/2013 at 1:13am / United States (Nebraska) / Miscellaneous

Today, I finally got the courage to make a move on the guy I've been crushing on. I asked him if he would like to go see a movie with me. He answered, "Sorry, I've already seen it." I didn't even mention any particular movie. FML

by Anonymous / 05/09/2013 at 3:01am / United States / Love

Today, while my boyfriend was in the kitchen, he got three text messages, all of which were from "Babe 2", "Babe 3", and "Babe 4". FML

by How strange / 04/20/2013 at 8:02am / United States / Love

Today, I met my new girlfriend at her house for the very first time. And her 17 cats, whose names all begin with the letter "K", because they're all "kewl kats." FML

by obnum / 04/18/2013 at 10:37am / United States / Love

Today, I uploaded a cute photo of my boyfriend and me on Facebook. Ten minutes later, his friend commented: "Dude! You're supposed to capture the Snorlax, not date it!" FML

by Snorlax / 04/13/2013 at 12:25am / Australia (New South Wales) / Love

Today, I found out that my classmates hate me so much that they have a seating arrangement where people have to sit next to me on a rotating basis. A fight broke out yesterday because someone tried to skip their turn. FML

by Anonymous / 04/11/2013 at 4:21pm / United Arab Emirates (Dubai) / Miscellaneous

Today, my dad yet again uttered the words "well, that escalated quickly," while watching the news. He uses this godforsaken meme multiple times a day. I lost my shit and told him to just shut up already. He raised an eyebrow and said, "well, that escalated quickly." FML

by fuck you dad / 03/30/2013 at 2:17pm / Ireland (Monaghan) / Miscellaneous