9lashes

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9lashes

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 25 August 1995 (20 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1754
  • Number of comments : 62
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About 9lashes : hi! my name is Jesse i like chatting and love seeing Pleonasm comments. i like swimming, listening to music, playing guitar and more! if ya want to find out what just message me (: oh and IRON MAN IS THE BEST SUPERHERO!! xD

9lashes's page activity

Visits<b>Fffhjno</b> - the 09/15/2015 at 10:28pm<b>lemonadestand</b> - the 09/03/2015 at 6:22pm<b>Kitten_love</b> - the 07/12/2015 at 5:51pm<b>LilsBills300</b> - the 03/31/2015 at 3:27pm<b>dextrementor</b> - the 08/29/2014 at 1:50am<b>GuyNoOneKnows</b> - the 08/28/2014 at 9:42pm<b>BFons</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 3:30pm<b>KagamineRinny</b> - the 07/12/2014 at 10:36am<b>Lilsbills</b> - the 06/02/2014 at 10:58am<b>msmama1985</b> - the 05/15/2014 at 3:13pm<b>Snugmybaby95</b> - the 04/20/2014 at 6:33am<b>morlogg</b> - the 02/17/2014 at 12:19am<b>XxOtakuDemonxX</b> - the 12/27/2013 at 12:35am<b>kit_kat19</b> - the 12/16/2013 at 6:31pm<b>Faith13</b> - the 11/24/2013 at 5:22pm<b>noraaaaa</b> - the 10/16/2013 at 11:29pm<b>Kriebel89</b> - the 09/10/2013 at 3:10am<b>IrishGirl12</b> - the 08/22/2013 at 12:06pm

9lashes's FML badges

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50 quality responses

Clicking reply to a comment is a worthy thing to do. To do so without getting buried is even better.

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9lashes's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to buy a birthday present for my boyfriend. While buying him a sweater, the cashier tried to up-sale me by asking if my boyfriend wore briefs or boxers, because both were on sale. Not thinking, I blurted out, "I don't know, they just come off." FML

by awkwardturtle / 01/25/2013 at 12:31am / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, I came home to find my girlfriend crying. Concerned, I quickly asked her what was wrong. She told me tearfully that she couldn't understand why her pet lizards hadn’t grown into dinosaurs yet, and that pet store had cheated her. I’m still concerned now, but for entirely different reasons. FML

by WTF / 01/16/2013 at 2:52am / Miscellaneous

Today, my mother-in-law gave me a bottle of champagne for my birthday. This is the third year in a row she has done this. I'm a recovering alcoholic, and she's well aware of that fact. FML

by Ari / 01/16/2013 at 1:36am / Health

Today, I told my mom we get Monday off due to Martin Luther King Jr. day. She then insisted that I had to go to school because that is "only for black people." FML

by Sydney / 01/15/2013 at 6:16pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, the girl of my dreams asked me if I wanted to go biking with her. "Just the two of us," she said. I had to turn her down because I'm 17 years old and never learned how to ride a bike. FML

by Anonymous / 01/13/2013 at 1:25pm / United States (Virginia) / Love

Today, I learned who my dad's new fiancée is. Upon meeting her she exclaimed, "My, I haven't seen you in a while!" She's my ex-boyfriend's mom. FML

by wtf dad / 01/09/2013 at 10:15pm / United States (Missouri) / Love

Today, I tried to get my boyfriend to roll over while he was asleep. He snores loud enough to wake the neighbors and if he lays on his side he usually stops. Instead of rolling over, he stuck his leg in the air, farted twice, and laughed about it in his sleep. He's still snoring. FML

by no sleep for me / 01/08/2013 at 2:44am / Miscellaneous

Today, I paused the movie my girlfriend and I were watching and told her, for the first time, that I loved her. Her response was to stare at me silently for a few seconds before unpausing the film. FML

by Anonymous / 01/03/2013 at 6:43am / Australia (New South Wales) / Love

Today, I was at a café with my friends when an elderly man noticed my dimples. He came up to me, stroked them while whispering, "One in a million" then walked out. Now my friends do this to me constantly, even while driving home. I almost hit a tree. FML

by Dimples / 01/03/2013 at 6:35am / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend proposed to me with the prettiest, most simple ring I have ever seen. I called my sister to tell her the good news, and her response was, "I know. He had me steal the ring from Claire's." FML

by Anonymous / 12/30/2012 at 6:58pm / United States (Colorado) / Love

Today, I went shopping. At the counter, the cashier started flirting with me and asked me for my number. He was cute, so I gave it to him. After walking out of the store, I got a text that said, "I didn't want to say it out loud, but your pants are unzipped." FML

by Ren / 12/28/2012 at 2:49am / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, a girl mistook me for her boyfriend and broke up with me because I'm "a liar and a cheating bastard." I've never seen her in my life, but I'm so lonely that I tried to convince her to give me another chance and stay with me. FML

by Alone / 12/28/2012 at 12:24am / United States / Love

Today, my car was broken into. What was stolen? My daughter's $11 One Direction poster. What will it cost to fix my car? $1,000. FML

by Anonymous / 12/27/2012 at 11:58pm / Canada (Alberta) / Money

Today, as her parents were supposed to be out of town, I stayed over with my girlfriend, and we ended up in bed together. Later on, while poking through the fridge, I heard footsteps, so I said, "Didn't think you'd be walking after that." I closed the fridge and saw her dad. FML

by Anonymous / 12/24/2012 at 1:02pm / United Kingdom (Cambridgeshire) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend ended sex by yelling, "THIS IS SPARTA!" and using his foot to push me off the bed. FML

by Saradee / 12/23/2012 at 11:55pm / United States (California) / Intimacy