9inchesSoft

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Offline (the 05/02/2015 at 8:35am)

9inchesSoft

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 772
  • Number of comments : 15
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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9inchesSoft's page activity

Visits<b>mattzawesome</b> - the 04/03/2016 at 6:36pm<b>YourAuntsCousin</b> - the 11/12/2014 at 10:39pm<b>Thebassoonist</b> - the 08/20/2014 at 10:23am<b>WhatsGoodBro</b> - the 03/25/2014 at 11:37pm<b>katiegurl19512</b> - the 03/25/2014 at 10:30am<b>toasty_narwals</b> - the 01/23/2014 at 9:51am<b>alexmac222</b> - the 01/10/2014 at 7:03am<b>beatlesgirl2u2</b> - the 11/30/2013 at 11:48am<b>djcayo</b> - the 10/15/2013 at 3:19am<b>ButterflyHaze</b> - the 10/13/2013 at 10:26pm<b>coried91</b> - the 10/10/2013 at 9:28am<b>forlifebro</b> - the 10/06/2013 at 12:08pm<b>Snisflen</b> - the 10/05/2013 at 11:53pm<b>ceji3</b> - the 10/04/2013 at 4:12pm<b>Absolutus</b> - the 07/25/2013 at 9:49am<b>dinosxxrawr</b> - the 07/25/2013 at 3:56am<b>jaffvis</b> - the 07/18/2013 at 11:46pm<b>obeykaitlyn</b> - the 07/13/2013 at 6:38pm

9inchesSoft's FML badges

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

See all of 9inchesSoft's badges

9inchesSoft's favorite FMLs

Today, my wedding ring went missing. Later, my 3-year-old came to me crying, he'd got it stuck on his penis. When I tried to get it off, he peed on me. FML

by anonymous / 10/09/2012 at 1:53am / United States / Kids

Today, a kid from school came to my house. He asked my dad if I was at home, because we were "planning a bit of the old, you know..." and made an obscene gesture. Now I'm grounded for a month, and no matter what I say, my dad won't believe that I've never even spoken to the kid before. FML

by shellski / 01/20/2012 at 8:21pm / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous

Today, there was a guy following me, so to avoid him, I crouched down and basically waddled behind a wall to get past him. Sure enough, first thing I see when I get around the corner, while still waddling, was an unhappy midget couple staring right at me. FML

by Mike Polk / 10/03/2011 at 8:37am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, while tanning on a family cruise, I woke up to a crowd of people staring at me in disgust. Apparently, I'd fallen asleep, developed a boner, and started french-kissing the air. I had to sit through both the surveillance tapes and a grand bollocking from security in the aftermath. FML

by f*cks_sake / 05/13/2011 at 7:07pm / United States (Ohio) / Intimacy

Today, while tanning on a family cruise, I woke up to a crowd of people staring at me in disgust. Apparently, I'd fallen asleep, developed a boner, and started french-kissing the air. I had to sit through both the surveillance tapes and a grand bollocking from security in the aftermath. FML

by f*cks_sake / 05/13/2011 at 7:07pm / United States (Ohio) / Intimacy

Today, in dance class, the instructor asked me to demonstrate the splits to the group. I slid down, my legs opening wider as I descended. I then loudly farted for the full 5 seconds it took to reach the ground. FML

by SkinsCastSelection / 01/17/2011 at 11:44am / Switzerland / Health

Today, I had to go to my 10 year old son's school to talk about my job being a chef. As I was almost finished, I asked the kids "What would you like to do when you grow up?" Without hesitation one kid replied with a straight face , "Anything but being a douchebag like you." FML

by helen_ / 04/23/2009 at 11:51am / United States (Massachusetts) / Work

Today, I was in spanish class, having a debate about the death penalty. When I went to make a point, I meant to say "La pena de muerte", which means "The death penalty". I said, "La pene de muerte". Turns out that means, "The penis of death". FML

by Señor Guapo / 03/04/2009 at 12:42pm / United States (Missouri) / Miscellaneous

Today, my 5 year old nephew showed me green martians he'd made with his new Play Doh set. I smiled and said, "Wow! Now, how about some blue martians!" He looked at me and replied, "How about some blue shut the fuck up?!" FML

by offbeans / 02/16/2009 at 9:29pm / United States (California) / Kids