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Today, I realized that my new boyfriend only showers about once every ten days, and to get him to shower more often I have to bribe him with oral sex. FML
I agree, your life sucks (470) - you totally deserved it (190)
On 03/19/2010 at 6:05am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Wakefield)
Today, after working an 8 hour shift that kept me out until 2am, I slept for five hours, during which time I dreamed about working. When I woke up, I left to work another 9 hour shift. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7753) - you totally deserved it (719)
On 03/19/2010 at 3:17am - work - by Overworked (woman) - United States (Alaska)
I agree, your life sucks (13579) - you totally deserved it (2659)
On 03/16/2010 at 8:46pm - misc - by Username - Sent from a mobile version
Today, I was eating pizza with my girlfriend. She got sauce on the corner of her mouth so I tried to be sexy and lick it off. It wasn't sauce, it was a cluster of zits. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8789) - you totally deserved it (17079)
On 03/07/2010 at 9:12am - misc - by choldcreations - United States (South Carolina)
Today, I found out how mature the guy I'm seeing is. After sex, he took the condom off and hit me in the face with it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (3146) - you totally deserved it (1352)
On 03/07/2010 at 9:08am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Manchester)
Today, I put my hamster in his ball, and spent about an hour cleaning his cage. When I came back, I realized he wasn't even alive. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11712) - you totally deserved it (3932)
On 02/13/2010 at 12:04am - misc - by Chris - United States (California)
Today, I had to put my 17 year old cat down. I cried the whole way up to the vet's office and back. After finally coming to terms with the situation, and trying to forget, my dad's friend walks up to me and says, "So, I heard you killed your cat?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (18606) - you totally deserved it (1808)
On 11/22/2009 at 11:30pm - love - by petlover (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, my girlfriend broke up me with for being the "perfect boyfriend". Apparently I'm the best boyfriend she's ever had, and she didn't know how to take it. So she dumped me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26038) - you totally deserved it (1815)
On 11/22/2009 at 10:59pm - love - by Micheal (man) - Canada (Alberta)
Today, I had nothing better to do than make a penis out of silly putty. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6111) - you totally deserved it (19667)
On 11/15/2009 at 6:26pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, I celebrated my 18th birthday. Alone. My only birthday wish came from the police officer who gave me a ticket. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18725) - you totally deserved it (1675)
On 11/07/2009 at 12:24am - misc - by bdayloser (man) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I received a 4 page text message from my mom explaining what she was going to do to me tonight in full detail. I am one name below her boyfriend on her contact list. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12116) - you totally deserved it (638)
On 11/01/2009 at 12:35am - intimacy - by Nomoretexting (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I was driving to work. I saw a cute boy in the car next to me. To try and look cool, I pretended I was talking on my cell phone. I got pulled over and got a ticket for using my cell phone while driving. FML
I agree, your life sucks (2755) - you totally deserved it (37217)
On 10/29/2009 at 5:14pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)
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