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I moderated this!
In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
Why am I up so early?
You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.
An insomniac or a creature of the dark
You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.
Today, I was enjoying a romantic cuddle on the couch with my boyfriend, when he suddenly decided to lift up my shirt, stick his face into my boobs, and go all Darth Vader on me. This included heavy breathing and phrases such as, "Amber... I am your boyfriend." FML
I agree, your life sucks (17847) - you deserved it (4590)
On 08/16/2012 at 11:16am - love - by Amberain (woman) - United Kingdom (Halton)
Today, I was hanging out with my brother and his friends. While we were walking to the store, there was a loud snap. Everyone jumped. My bra had snapped, and I had to hold back tears of pain and pretend I was just as confused as they were, while they searched for the source of the sound. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18337) - you deserved it (1614)
On 08/15/2012 at 7:58pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia
Today, I was drawing while on the train, when a very good-looking woman looked at my work and said, "Wow, she's pretty. Is it supposed to be me?" She said it in a flirty tone, but before I could stop myself, I'd said "nah, it's just a generic face". FML
I agree, your life sucks (13716) - you deserved it (6815)
On 08/15/2012 at 1:41pm - love - by Anonymous - United States
Today, while at work, I used the restroom. After I noticed we were out of paper towels, I just tried shaking my hands dry. I then readjusted my bra, since it'd been driving me crazy all day. After getting back to my cubicle, I realized that I had two wet handprints over my boobs. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12237) - you deserved it (7684)
On 08/07/2012 at 3:17pm - work - by Employee (woman) - United States (Nebraska)
Today, one of the human turds that I stupidly added on Facebook posted how terrible her life is after her dad refused to arrange yet another holiday for her this year, so I bitched her out for being such a spoiled little brat. A few hours later, her boyfriend came over and beat the shit out of me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22245) - you deserved it (22044)
On 08/01/2012 at 4:59pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Bedfordshire)
Today, while in the store with my kids, they wanted to buy tampons because I am "getting cranky, and it should be that time of the month." FML
I agree, your life sucks (7154) - you deserved it (11869)
On 07/28/2012 at 12:17am - kids - by love_to_live - United States (Wisconsin)
Today, my husband and I were watching Lord of the Rings. My husband told me he sees the eye of Sauron every time he goes down on me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16657) - you deserved it (2317)
On 07/26/2012 at 10:13pm - intimacy - by LOTRfail (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I had to explain to my boyfriend why period blood couldn't be saved and donated to the hospital for transplants. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17580) - you deserved it (1652)
On 07/26/2012 at 8:46pm - misc - by Carrie G. (woman) - United States (Ohio)
Today, my boyfriend got a new job. He'll be over the road for three weeks at a time, and home on the remaining week. Basically, I'll see him once a month. Guess which time of month it'll fall on. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28803) - you deserved it (2327)
On 07/25/2012 at 2:08pm - love - by Itstrickyyxx (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, everyone found out about the strange but intense fetish I have for women physically lifting me. It all came out when my friend, a female bodybuilder, decided to grab and pick me up for a laugh. I came in my pants, in front of about twenty people. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31281) - you deserved it (7151)
On 07/25/2012 at 12:51pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, my girlfriend and I got into a heated argument at a house party. To avoid a huge scene, I pulled her into another room, during which I managed to trip over my feet and faceplant the floor. She shouted, "Hah! That's what you get!" Now everyone thinks she beat the shit out of me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15785) - you deserved it (3489)
On 07/24/2012 at 4:08pm - health - by *facefloor* (man) - United States
Today, I got mugged in broad daylight, in a park, by a teenage girl. To top it off, I'm a grown man. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16832) - you deserved it (6254)
On 07/10/2012 at 11:27am - misc - by Username (man) - United States
Today, while looking through pictures of my boyfriend and me on Facebook, I noticed that in practically every single one featuring my best friend, his eyes are directed down her shirt. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20007) - you deserved it (384)
On 07/07/2012 at 6:00pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, my over-protective husband went into an extreme fit of jealousy at the sight of me breast-feeding our newborn baby boy. He's trying to make me bottle-feed our boy, because apparently it's "wrong" to let another guy touch my boobs. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35065) - you deserved it (3725)
On 07/06/2012 at 1:44pm - love - by wife of a shithead (woman) - Norway (Oslo)
Today, my new boss gave everyone a lecture about sexual harassment in the workplace. Which would be fine if he'd been able to tear his gaze off my chest for more than a minute at a time. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15006) - you deserved it (2330)
On 07/03/2012 at 12:43pm - work - by hypocrite (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)
Monday 17 June 2013
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