8313girl

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8313girl

14Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 5 July 1983 (32 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 5398
  • Number of comments : 193
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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8313girl's page activity

Visits<b>Siorghra</b> - the 05/05/2016 at 11:37pm<b>supplyman</b> - the 05/05/2016 at 2:04pm<b>OmgimBored</b> - the 05/05/2016 at 1:20pm<b>Mdon0719</b> - the 05/03/2016 at 9:51am<b>Genius_Kitty</b> - the 04/24/2016 at 12:38am<b>Cuntflicted</b> - the 04/23/2016 at 12:49am<b>BORApassat</b> - the 03/23/2016 at 12:46pm<b>papa_vas</b> - the 03/22/2016 at 10:29pm<b>usmot88</b> - the 03/22/2016 at 2:38am<b>gopackgo97</b> - the 03/22/2016 at 12:50am<b>kokopuffs3</b> - the 03/21/2016 at 11:36pm<b>Magnoxidans</b> - the 03/21/2016 at 10:52pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 03/21/2016 at 8:10pm<b>serrentinoj</b> - the 03/21/2016 at 4:01pm<b>tin_cup</b> - the 03/21/2016 at 2:24pm<b>Y0UI34574RD</b> - the 03/15/2016 at 3:51pm<b>HarleyBlues</b> - the 03/14/2016 at 12:13pm<b>fastman19</b> - the 03/14/2016 at 6:54am

Fucked!<b>gopackgo97</b> - the 03/22/2016 at 5:50am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 03/22/2016 at 1:10am<b>tin_cup</b> - the 03/21/2016 at 7:24pm<b>fastman19</b> - the 03/14/2016 at 11:55am<b>HarleyBlues</b> - the 02/15/2016 at 3:07am<b>UberMom</b> - the 02/14/2016 at 7:54pm<b>blueyes909</b> - the 02/09/2016 at 6:59am<b>gobiteme2</b> - the 11/30/2015 at 3:13am<b>khoov19</b> - the 11/29/2015 at 9:11pm<b>tranced_</b> - the 09/20/2015 at 5:07am<b>The_Avatar</b> - the 09/19/2015 at 5:04pm<b>boricualuv</b> - the 06/22/2015 at 8:58pm<b>inowhtthefoxsays</b> - the 06/07/2015 at 5:15pm<b>Xx_Slayer_xX</b> - the 04/11/2015 at 10:03pm

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8313girl's favorite FMLs

Today, my daughter and her "friend" kept using crude euphemisms right in front of me, thinking I was too old or too stupid to figure out what they meant. I nearly had an aneurysm when she told him he could put his "pencil" in her "sharpener" next time they studied together. FML

by Anonymous / 04/09/2016 at 9:12am / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Kids

Today, I was drunk and sent my friend a picture of my penis. He edited the picture and put hands and sunglasses on it before sending it to practically everyone I know. FML

Today, my boyfriend moved in with me. I just walked into my kitchen to find my thirty year-old, perfectly seasoned cast iron skillet completely submerged in soapy water in the sink, presumably from last night when he washed the dishes. FML

by miss_strauss / 01/25/2016 at 1:21pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my grandmother insisted that Mexicans sacrifice humans every year as part of their Catholic religion. The Swaggart guy on TV said so, and apparently, he can't be wrong, ever. FML

by wtfiswronghere / 12/08/2015 at 1:36pm / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was roused from my peaceful slumber by the sound of evil laughter coming from my closet. It was my old Furby, with dead batteries, that I could have sworn I got rid of several years ago. FML

Today, I tried to give my first hand-job while wearing fuzzy socks in a carpeted room. I reached out to touch his penis and shocked him. FML

by nnniii / 11/15/2015 at 11:55pm / United States (Washington) / Intimacy

Today, my girlfriend and I were getting heated. I kissed her on the neck, chest, stomach, and threw up as I kissed between her legs. FML

by Walter / 10/23/2015 at 11:17pm / Spain / Intimacy

Today, I woke up early for work. Had my coffee, finished up a report and headed out of my house. Not only was the office closed today, but the silent alarm was on, which is triggered by a door opening even if you use a key. I was startled by the cops searching the building, ran, and got tazed. FML

by BryanTazed / 08/22/2015 at 8:21am / United States (Virginia) / Work

Today, the professor I've had a crush on informed me that there's only one way left I could still pass his course. Thinking this was an attempt to flirt with me, I told him I'd do anything he could imagine. He then looked confused when he asked me to write an essay. FML

by notwhatithought / 08/21/2015 at 3:43pm / Germany (Bayern) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boss bitched me out for violating workplace privacy, after he found an FML post from last year that eerily resembled a situation that happened the same year. He thought I posted it and twisted things to make him look like an idiot. I've never posted here in my life. FML

by Anonymous / 08/20/2015 at 1:48pm / United Kingdom (Fife) / Work

Today, my cleavage got me out of a speeding ticket. That is, until the officer looked up long enough to realize I'm a guy. FML

by fat and broke / 06/28/2015 at 3:17am / United States (Washington) / Transportation

Today, one of my regulars came up to my car in the parking lot. We talked through the window while I put on my makeup. He then asked for a hug because he won't be in for two weeks. I obliged and he was kind enough to slide his hand between my legs. He then gave me $50 not to tell his wife. FML

by witchybaby89 / 05/25/2015 at 10:50pm / United States / Work

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I woke up in my living room after having a party. I then realized my fish tank with many different species was missing from its usual spot. After searching for a few minutes, I finally found it in the freezer. FML

by Anonymous / 05/25/2015 at 12:10pm / Canada (Ontario) / Animals

Today, I got a massage. Just as I was starting to relax, the massage therapist drooled on my face. FML

by spitty / 04/14/2015 at 5:50pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, I took my 5-year-old daughter to the play place at McDonalds but I had to keep her busy, instead of letting her play. A mom was teaching her 3-year-old daughter how to pole dance, using the play place's poles. FML

by Pandistoteles / 04/14/2015 at 5:17pm / United States / Kids