Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

8313girl

Offline (6 hours ago) | Search for a member

8313girl

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 5 July 1983 (31 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3837
  • Number of comments : 134
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

8313girl's page activity

Visits<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - yesterday at 8:02am<b>Lalala579121</b> - yesterday at 2:27am<b>pete9913</b> - the 05/23/2015 at 8:03am<b>CODplayer4lyfe</b> - the 05/14/2015 at 4:56pm<b>Soninuva</b> - the 05/11/2015 at 9:32pm<b>ShakeyH</b> - the 05/08/2015 at 6:40pm<b>feetlvr</b> - the 04/26/2015 at 4:07pm<b>Zaketh2112</b> - the 04/26/2015 at 11:21am<b>Xx_Slayer_xX</b> - the 04/11/2015 at 4:03pm<b>Y0UI34574RD</b> - the 04/10/2015 at 4:06pm<b>constipation</b> - the 03/21/2015 at 9:39am<b>KuzzBuzz3</b> - the 03/09/2015 at 6:49am<b>Treken</b> - the 03/01/2015 at 2:12am<b>ZelmaSlayer</b> - the 02/25/2015 at 10:45am<b>twerkthemdrums</b> - the 02/23/2015 at 11:21pm<b>robertd73</b> - the 01/28/2015 at 12:21am<b>viaaaaaa</b> - the 01/27/2015 at 4:31pm<b>GoodOptions</b> - the 01/02/2015 at 1:55pm

Fucked!<b>Xx_Slayer_xX</b> - the 04/11/2015 at 10:03pm

8313girl's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of 8313girl's badges

8313girl's favorite FMLs

Today, I got a massage. Just as I was starting to relax, the massage therapist drooled on my face. FML

#21393655
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28405) - you deserved it (1937)

On 04/14/2015 at 5:50pm - misc - by spitty (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I took my 5-year-old daughter to the play place at McDonalds but I had to keep her busy, instead of letting her play. A mom was teaching her 3-year-old daughter how to pole dance, using the play place's poles. FML

#21393641
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29082) - you deserved it (2416)

On 04/14/2015 at 5:17pm - kids - by Pandistoteles - United States

Today, I woke up this morning in a panic. Last night, I heard scratching at my door, but I thought it was just my cat and went back to sleep. This morning, it hit me that my cat is 600 miles away living with my mom in Iowa. I'm terrified to even sleep now. FML

#21370427
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (90) - you deserved it (2573)

On 03/08/2015 at 10:41am - animals - by no salt, no burning, just STFU (man) - United States

Today, I went to the doctor, because I've been having stomach pains and nausea for weeks. He ended up gravely telling me I'm pregnant. I freaked out and panicked about what my parents would say. Then his laughter reminded me that I'm a guy. A really stupid one. FML

#21367918
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50) - you deserved it (118)

On 03/04/2015 at 10:03am - health - by actually just constipated.. and stupid - Tunisia

Today, while having sex, my fiancé started talking dirty. I enjoyed it, until he had a brain fart and said, "God, you love fucking my pussy." FML

#21364648
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29759) - you deserved it (3167)

On 02/27/2015 at 2:37pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, the CEO of my company leaned over and said, "Hey, I've been meaning to thank you…" I thought he was going to thank me for all of my hard work, but he continued, "…for wearing that shirt today. I can totally see your boobs." FML

#21354210
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33176) - you deserved it (6080)

On 02/11/2015 at 4:51pm - work - by titsmcgee (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, at work, I sneezed so hard that I hit my head on my cash register. A second later, I heard roaring laughter from the security room, followed by someone saying to play it back. I'd almost convinced myself it wasn't about me, when one of the guys came out and gave me a thumb up. FML

#21349710
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33733) - you deserved it (2960)

On 02/04/2015 at 2:28pm - work - by fxck (woman) -

Today, I woke up after taking the new sleeping pills I was prescribed for my insomnia. I slept for 12 hours and had 5 missed calls from my boss. FML

#21346205
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26386) - you deserved it (2354)

On 01/29/2015 at 1:32pm - health - by anon - United States (New Mexico)

Today, I found out my boyfriend dresses in my underwear and tights, takes suggestive shots of his ass and legs, and uses them to trick people into thinking he's a girl so they buy him stuff in his online games. FML

#21340885
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33798) - you deserved it (3705)

On 01/20/2015 at 10:08am - misc - by mybfthecrossdresser (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I had to call a few different women and explain to them that my little brother had catfished them. I had to do it because he is mute and my parents were too busy screaming at him. FML

#21335978
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25959) - you deserved it (1831)

On 01/12/2015 at 8:11pm - misc - by PO'd big bro - United States (Georgia)

Today, I signed into my online class, got bored, and took off my headphones to argue with my roommates about anal sex. At the end of the argument, I put my headphones back on to hear my professor asking if someone could call me to tell me to turn my damn mic off. FML

Today, I got shitfaced at a club. A cute girl I'd met earlier in the evening offered to drive me home in my car and spend the night with me. She crashed my car and did a runner before the cops showed up. They wouldn't believe my story. I now have a wrecked car and a DUI. FML

#21329473
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29136) - you deserved it (8610)

On 01/02/2015 at 5:14pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Maryland)

Today, my date mugged me, just minutes after I paid our bill at the restaurant. FML

#21320485
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32860) - you deserved it (2471)

On 12/19/2014 at 6:27pm - money - by j4 - United Kingdom

Today, I posted a photo on Facebook showing a side-by-side view of me before and after I'd tried out my new makeup. My dad commented, "What is this, Gollum cosplaying an Orc?" My mum, brother, and over 20 "friends" liked his comment. FML

#21320382
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27478) - you deserved it (4636)

On 12/19/2014 at 2:36pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)



FML's blog

  • JT's illustrated FML
  • Hello everybody, how's it going? This week we're looking at the delicate art of getting along with your neighbours. If you've ever lived in an apartment building, you'll know that having people live…

Friday 22 May 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: