Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

712sash

Online | Search for a member

712sash

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Melbourne, Australia
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 9 September 1993 (21 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1110
  • Number of comments : 57
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About 712sash : G'day. My name is Rahul. I'm a 3rd year IT student. I like listening to music and watching telly shows such as TBBT, HIMYM, BB, Dexter, Friends, etc. I have a weird down-stairs neighbour whose moan I can hear while she's doing it with her man.
I like travelling and cooking.
I use sarcasm as a defense mechanism.
Feel free to shoot me a message, I don't bite :)

Please visit my website - http://www.rahulkhemlani.com
(Don't worry, I won't be asking for any money)

712sash's page activity

Visits<b>delilablue95</b> - the 01/13/2015 at 9:34pm<b>Amy_Nguyen_12</b> - the 12/31/2014 at 5:23pm<b>bcoe</b> - the 12/29/2014 at 5:45pm<b>kerstileann</b> - the 12/27/2014 at 9:27pm<b>rylzz18</b> - the 12/25/2014 at 4:40pm<b>joejoe1415</b> - the 12/22/2014 at 1:40am<b>Scrambled</b> - the 12/11/2014 at 2:33pm<b>JEFFEBEANS</b> - the 12/08/2014 at 4:05pm<b>Pascal_grunwald</b> - the 12/03/2014 at 1:25am<b>ElementSponge</b> - the 11/26/2014 at 11:30pm<b>AnalAssassin1</b> - the 11/24/2014 at 1:57am<b>lakaiskate</b> - the 11/15/2014 at 8:41pm<b>fourth_line_dust</b> - the 11/13/2014 at 5:49pm<b>Sassy_Kitten96</b> - the 11/09/2014 at 12:24am<b>luckybae123</b> - the 11/08/2014 at 7:47pm<b>cocogibson</b> - the 11/02/2014 at 9:17am<b>Feremist</b> - the 10/28/2014 at 10:42pm<b>BBlah</b> - the 10/23/2014 at 6:16am

712sash's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

See all of 712sash's badges

712sash's favorite FMLs

Today, my wife wanted me to take her to a new restaurant in town. When I looked it up and saw their prices, I almost had a heart attack. When I said it was too expensive, she snapped "Maybe you'd like to look up 'Lorena Bobbitt' next?!" We went to the restaurant. FML

#21338935
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27746) - you deserved it (5679)

On 01/17/2015 at 1:49pm - love - by wounded pride, intact cock (man) - United States

Today, I tried baking my own bread to save food money. Unfortunately I screwed it up, prompting my wife to look at me pityingly and say "Wow, can't get even bread to rise." before walking out. I have erectile dysfunction, and she constantly insults me like this. FML

#21333974
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38373) - you deserved it (3037)

On 01/09/2015 at 3:16pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, after having sex with my boyfriend, we were cuddling when he grabbed his penis and made it say, "That was amazing! Thank you for the sex." He's 21 years old. FML

#21330918
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26707) - you deserved it (5600)

On 01/04/2015 at 9:50pm - love - by myboyfriendisweird - United States (Arizona)

Today, my Canadian friend is staying a few days at my parents' house. I drove him from the airport, only to find my idiot dad had decked the spare room out with maple syrup bottles. He keeps saying "eh" all the time and asked "What's he so upset aboot?" when my friend was offended. FML

#21316775
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30998) - you deserved it (2981)

On 12/13/2014 at 1:36pm - misc - by ehxtraordinarily pissed (man) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, at the fast food joint I work at, I had to climb into the children's play area and chase out two horny teens who thought it was an appropriate place to stick their hands down each other's pants and fool around. I don't get paid enough for this shit. FML

Today, my mom found my dildo, and got so angry that she beat me with it. FML

#21309415
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45433) - you deserved it (11761)

On 12/01/2014 at 12:55pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I sat down for a poop. The toilet seat slid off immediately, taking me with it. I lay on the bathroom floor for several moments stunned, still pooping. FML

#21308801
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32821) - you deserved it (4231)

On 11/30/2014 at 2:32pm - misc - by pooplife - United Kingdom (Nottingham)

Today, I was studying for my Spanish midterm nonstop. After I closed my book, I was so tired that I thought that my cat was asking me questions in Spanish. FML

#21303629
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28486) - you deserved it (3269)

On 11/21/2014 at 11:36pm - misc - by Studying is for crazy people. - United States (California)

Today, I got in trouble for shooting my paintball gun at a piece of wood, so my dad told me to go wash it. While I was washing it, he shot me several times in the back, yelling, "That's payback for being born." FML

#21300331
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32001) - you deserved it (3308)

On 11/16/2014 at 9:26pm - misc - by no - United States

Today, I was speeding home, bursting to take a crap. I pulled into my driveway and made it inside, before my wife told me the plumber was still working on our pipes. I ended up having to take a crap in my own backyard, behind a tree. FML

#21298320
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31619) - you deserved it (2847)

On 11/13/2014 at 1:01pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, like any other day since that stupid movie Frozen came out, people have been asking me if I want to build a snowman, like they're the funniest people on the planet. My name is Elsa. FML

#21297408
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44074) - you deserved it (3852)

On 11/11/2014 at 11:34pm - work - by elsatheannoyed (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my father picked me up from the police academy I'm attending, and got caught speeding. The officer was my drill instructor, and I had to do push-ups on the side of the highway. FML

#21297310
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34542) - you deserved it (4397)

On 11/11/2014 at 10:16pm - misc - by Xx_DEXIJOKER_xX - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my boyfriend became a magician. His best trick? The disappearing act. FML

#21292946
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30368) - you deserved it (3362)

On 11/05/2014 at 8:11pm - love - by highheelcyanide (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I learned that the house I've been living in and paying rent for the past two months was never advertised as vacant. I learned this when the actual homeowners walked in, and called the police for an "intruder." FML

#21291174
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35872) - you deserved it (3013)

On 11/03/2014 at 10:54am - money - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Bath and North East Somerset)



Idan Schneider's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Idan Schneider's illustrated FML
  • Oi! Stop "playing" that digeridoo and get out! There, now that I've tidied up my apartment, we can begin. How are you all doing? Have you got your leather jacket out of storage to go hang out down at…

Thursday 22 January 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: