About 4everblackjack : Hey there! I come here to read FML's right before I sleep. I normally don't comment but if I do, I apologize in advance for anything stupid I might've said. I'm also obsessed with this Kpop group called 2NE1. Message me if you want; I'll reply late though..
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4everblackjack's favorite FMLs
by Anonymous / 03/21/2011 at 1:32pm / United Kingdom (Wiltshire) / Geek
Today, we were going to Disney World all the way from North Carolina. After 12 hours of driving, my kids started fighting and complaining. My husband finally said, "If I hear you guys one more time we're turning around and going back home." They annoyed him once again, and we actually went home. FML
by jaimie / 03/19/2011 at 12:00pm / United States (Florida) / Kids
Today, it was the début of the high school musical I was in. When two others and I sang the word "Hell", my mother yelled at us for using that language, while the musical was still going, and dragged me off stage. FML
by Anonymous / 03/12/2011 at 12:14am / United States (Missouri) / Kids
by Anonymous / 03/05/2011 at 6:43am / France (Alsace) / Love
by spiderchick23 / 02/09/2011 at 7:41pm / United States (Missouri) / Work
Today, I accidentally drank my sister's science project. Her science project consisted of taking a glass of orange juice and putting maggots in it to see if they would live. I thought it was just pulp. FML
by Username / 02/02/2011 at 11:46pm / Miscellaneous
by imsadnow / 01/31/2011 at 3:01pm / United States (Florida) / Kids
Today, I was watching TV in my living room while my wife was cooking. I began to smell the aroma of her potato soup, which made me hungry. Suddenly, I realized that the smell wasn't my wife's cooking but was in fact my body odor. FML
by jroberts / 01/25/2011 at 10:25am / Miscellaneous
Today, in dance class, the instructor asked me to demonstrate the splits to the group. I slid down, my legs opening wider as I descended. I then loudly farted for the full 5 seconds it took to reach the ground. FML
by SkinsCastSelection / 01/17/2011 at 11:44am / Switzerland / Health
by sad / 01/08/2011 at 12:22am / United States (Oregon) / Love
Today, my boss walked in and said something I didn't quite hear, but my co-worker chuckled so to be polite, I laughed with him. They gave me some weird looks. My boss was actually talking about his wife's tumor and my co-worker was coughing. FML
by sucks / 01/05/2011 at 2:41am / Netherlands (Zuid-Holland) / Work
by Anonymous / 12/22/2010 at 2:54am / United States / Health
by Anonymous / 12/19/2010 at 3:51pm / United States (Arizona) / Animals
Today, I was in a public restroom taking a dump. It's difficult for me to do it in public, so to make it easier I kept telling myself "Nobody's here, you're all alone." I then heard "No, you're not." I didn't realize I was saying it out loud. And that I wasn't alone. FML
by shit / 12/14/2010 at 4:26am / United States (Colorado) / Health
Today, the elevator got stuck in between floor 4 and 5 at my doctors office. I had been having violent diarrhea. It was the reason I was at the doctor. Elevator was stuck for 35 minutes. During that time, I diarrhea'd in my pants twice. There were seven other people in the elevator. FML
by Christopher / 12/13/2010 at 4:16am / Canada (Alberta) / Health
- Today, at 11:30 p.m., after a 5-hour train journey to get back to Paris carrying a suitcase that’s… Today, I’m in China, and I took my Golden Retriever to the groomer’s to get him cleaned up, because… Today, I sprayed pepper spray on a guy who appeared to be following me. He was really cute, and was…