409sPoisonGirl

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409sPoisonGirl

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 25 January 1991 (25 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 570
  • Number of comments : 34
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 20 posted

About 409sPoisonGirl : Dumbfucks amuse me. Give me your best.

409sPoisonGirl's page activity

Visits<b>abbs24</b> - the 05/27/2016 at 11:04pm<b>evanvoss</b> - the 05/27/2016 at 9:47am<b>max367</b> - the 05/26/2016 at 12:58pm<b>player20270</b> - the 05/21/2016 at 3:01pm<b>NNOTCHO</b> - the 05/09/2016 at 4:39pm<b>jetemack</b> - the 04/24/2016 at 5:58pm<b>missmorggan</b> - the 04/21/2016 at 1:55pm<b>youdontsay123456</b> - the 04/18/2016 at 7:47pm<b>HairyPunisher</b> - the 04/14/2016 at 6:36pm<b>Phazoid</b> - the 04/10/2016 at 10:26pm<b>saucybugger101</b> - the 04/06/2016 at 6:09am<b>RandomJam124</b> - the 04/05/2016 at 11:51am<b>arich6210</b> - the 03/27/2016 at 7:24pm<b>n_a_v_y</b> - the 03/09/2016 at 9:19am<b>djurmel89</b> - the 03/07/2016 at 2:09am<b>Lt_Senpai</b> - the 02/29/2016 at 4:43pm<b>llamadramas</b> - the 02/28/2016 at 8:10pm<b>gkmd98</b> - the 02/23/2016 at 1:35pm

Fucked!<b>Mcstud1y</b> - the 11/10/2015 at 11:38pm

409sPoisonGirl's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Back from a party

An FML submitted on a Saturday morning between 5 and 6am can't be a good FML.

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409sPoisonGirl's favorite FMLs

Today, I told my boyfriend I wanted to spice up our sex life. He suggested incorporating bacon. He was serious. FML

by cortanaisahobot / 07/19/2012 at 4:29pm / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy

Today, it was the only time in my life that I have ever received an A+ for something. Thank you, eBay buyer. FML

by Anonymous / 04/10/2012 at 10:39am / Australia (South Australia) / Miscellaneous

Today, while I was on the bus to work, a morbidly obese man sat down next to me. When my stop came and I stood up to get off, he just looked at me, said with a smirk, "good luck with that," and went back to reading his paper. I missed my stop. FML

by busfail / 03/22/2012 at 2:00pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Transportation

Today, my mother thought it would be a good idea to tell me that I was conceived on an airplane toilet. FML

by Gemma / 01/06/2012 at 6:16pm / United Kingdom (Lancashire) / Intimacy

Today, my separation anxiety got so intense, I found myself smelling my boyfriend's pillow. FML

Today, I received a rejection letter from a college that I'd applied to 6 years ago. FML

by Anonymous / 09/13/2011 at 1:53am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, while babysitting a five year old, I found a cartoon called Metalocalypse for him to watch while I made dinner. I didn't realize it was an "adult" cartoon until afterwards. He watched a whole episode about a clown with a cocaine problem. FML

by dummy / 07/11/2011 at 3:21pm / United States (New Hampshire) / Kids

Today, I woke up to what I thought was my 9 month old son breastfeeding. It was my boyfriend. According to him, he wanted to experience what his mother never gave him as a kid. FML

by Anonymous / 03/30/2011 at 2:26pm / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy

Today, I had to move back in with my dad and brother. After getting settled, I had to shower. I got everything ready and when I got in, it smelled strongly of pee. The stink was so intense I could barely breathe. Cleaning doesn't even help. I'm stuck here for at least a month. I hate living with men. FML

by Anonymous / 11/02/2010 at 2:06am / United States (Wisconsin) / Health

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I drove to the hospital to see my newborn. I went to the room, picked him out of the crate and held him. Then I heard the toilet flush and saw a woman who I didn't know come out. She screamed. My wife was in the room next door. FML

by Anonymous / 11/01/2010 at 1:30pm / United States (Minnesota) / Kids

Today, my boyfriend said he wants a Hello Kitty wedding. FML

by Anonymous / 10/23/2010 at 5:07am / Australia (Victoria) / Love

Today, I discovered that if I put my ankles on my boyfriends shoulders while we are having sex, I will pee myself. FML

by noname / 09/22/2010 at 1:37am / Canada (Quebec) / Intimacy

Today, for the first time in about 3 years, I decided to clean my car. It was going really well until I looked down at what I was about to pick up. On the back seat floor lay a dead snake, which at one point, for god knows how long, was living in my car while I unknowningly drove it. FML

by snakeboy / 08/24/2009 at 12:49am / Australia (South Australia) / Transportation

Today, my parents bought me a wine glass with "Who needs a man?" painted all over it. Cute, until after dinner my mom looked me in the eyes and asked with complete sincerity, "Kara, are you gay?" My parents tried to get me to come out. I'm straight. FML

by pa / 05/21/2009 at 9:06am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was walking through the mall with my boyfriend of a year and a half. There was sign outside of the jewelry store that said, "Engagement Rings-No interest for 12 months." I said, "Look, baby! No interest." He replied, "That's right...NO INTEREST." FML

by Ma.Sa.La. / 02/27/2009 at 10:18am / United States (Maryland) / Love