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33Got_Game's FML badges
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33Got_Game's favorite FMLs
Today, I came home from work to my hot roommate cooking and wearing nothing but an apron. She pulled me into her room and things went great. At least, they did before I woke up in the break room with my coworkers and boss all gathered around, listening to me talking in my sleep. FML
by Dirty_Mind_69 / 07/20/2013 at 4:35am / United States (Louisiana) / Work
by imawesomeokay / 07/20/2013 at 1:53am / Mexico (Jalisco) / Transportation
by Anonymous / 07/19/2013 at 4:57pm / Korea, Republic of (Seoul-t'ukpyolsi) / Love
Today, it's my fifth wedding anniversary. My wife bailed on the romantic dinner that I arranged in favor of running off with her friends. Their big event: an amateur Fight Club event they'd decided to stage in an abandoned parking lot. FML
by Anonymous / 07/19/2013 at 12:41pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Love
Today, I was on drive-thru where I work. Our policy is that we can give free treats to dogs that come through. A woman came in and I noticed her dog. Without a thought, I grabbed a treat and asked if her dog wanted one. I looked again. The 'dog' was her daughter. FML
by Treats For Days / 07/19/2013 at 9:54am / Canada (Alberta) / Work
by FootinMouth / 07/18/2013 at 5:48pm / United States (Kentucky) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 07/18/2013 at 3:01pm / Netherlands (Limburg) / Intimacy
Today, I woke up after passing out at a very small house party. I set a three drink limit, but apparently nobody listened, because there were beer cans everywhere, half my stuff was on the floor, and someone had shat in my bathtub. I had to clean all of it up alone. FML
by Anonymous / 07/18/2013 at 2:16pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Miscellaneous
by coldstar / 07/18/2013 at 5:06am / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Animals
Today, I was at the park playing Frisbee with my friends, when I saw a boy sitting on a bench looking rather sad. "Hey!" I yelled, and he looked up at me. I lightly threw the Frisbee in his direction, and it hit him in the face. He was blind. FML
by WasntMe / 07/17/2013 at 7:15pm / United States / Kids
by Anonymous / 07/16/2013 at 9:55pm / United States (Washington) / Kids
by hannahisacooler / 07/16/2013 at 7:41pm / United States (California) / Love
by ... cheers / 07/16/2013 at 4:32pm / United Kingdom (Renfrewshire) / Love
Today, I started doing it again. I'd given up for years, but when I saw the pack I just couldn't help myself. One taste was enough to make me finish off the whole pack. Nobody knows that I've fallen off the wagon and I'm so ashamed of myself. Today, I began eating my cat's biscuits again. FML
by Aliiiice / 07/16/2013 at 9:18am / France (Haute-Normandie) / Health
by Anonymous / 07/16/2013 at 12:41am / United States / Miscellaneous
- 1Today, after two weeks of trying to convince my parents to go to my high school graduation. They… 2Today, my neighbor's 4-year-old daughter came up to me and asked if she could have my dog. When I… 3Today, my flatmate came home from a date with the same guy that I have been in love with since high…
- Today, my fiance decided that he wasn't ready to be married and that the engagement was off. oh but… Today, I found out my meth head of an uncle is moving in. I was warned to not keep any money in the… Today, I used the phrase "It smells like something died in here". Something did. My cat Jasmine. FML