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30stmfan128

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30stmfan128

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  • Number of visits : 871
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

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30stmfan128's favorite FMLs

Today, I was chatting with my choir leader. I told him that I have been thinking about taking singing lessons. His immediate reaction was, "Thank god, finally!" FML

#20474677
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24353) - you deserved it (6056)

On 01/23/2013 at 10:44am - misc - by sdd (woman) - Switzerland (Bern)

Today, I had to drag my grandmother out of a store because she went up to a black family and started apologizing for slavery. FML

#20472335
17 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39639) - you deserved it (2675)

On 01/21/2013 at 11:08pm - misc - by daddy's girl - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, both my brother and sister missed my wedding. She was playing in a Call of Duty tournament, and he got so high that he forgot about the wedding completely. He was my best man. FML

#20458912
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46426) - you deserved it (3329)

On 01/14/2013 at 12:36pm - misc - by What a happy day (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I was at a party with my crush. The collar on his shirt was sticking up so I fixed it for him. He gave me a hug and said, "Aww you're so good to me. You're like my mother. You can be my college mother." I got mother-zoned. FML

#20458655
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46274) - you deserved it (5624)

On 01/14/2013 at 7:56am - love - by shiney100893 (woman) - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, my 14-year-old daughter came home after sneaking out and partying. She was totally drunk, and started crying on my shoulder because some boy named "Thomas" has a small dick, and she had to fake an orgasm. FML

#20419819
270 comments

I agree, your life sucks (79971) - you deserved it (24554)

On 12/24/2012 at 10:03pm - intimacy - by valnaj1 (woman) - Denmark (Syddanmark)

Today, my boyfriend ended sex by yelling, "THIS IS SPARTA!" and using his foot to push me off the bed. FML

#20417691
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55404) - you deserved it (9853)

On 12/23/2012 at 11:55pm - intimacy - by Saradee (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I had plans for a romantic night with my boyfriend, who is perfect in every way possible. We were going to have sex for the first time as well. Unfortunately, I had a dream last night about him shitting all over me and I can't look at him with a straight face. FML

#20403258
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35122) - you deserved it (13791)

On 12/17/2012 at 3:17am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, at the gas station, the automatic door didn't open when I approached it. I asked the cashier to open it for me, joking that because I'm a redhead, I didn't have a soul and it wouldn't open for me. The cashier freaked and wouldn't let me go until I proved I had a soul. FML

#20199980
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24860) - you deserved it (5054)

On 12/11/2012 at 1:07am - misc - by Devil (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I had to do a presentation in front of my entire school. I was very nervous, so I used the old trick of picturing everyone naked. Everyone then got a good view of my erection. FML

#20199177
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35086) - you deserved it (14548)

On 12/10/2012 at 3:41pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, "The Phantom of the Opera" soundtrack blasted me awake at 4 am. Not knowing how it got on my iPod, I checked and found I had bought the whole $17.00 album in my sleep. This is the second time this month; the first time I downloaded the soundtrack from "The Wizard of Oz". FML

#20198547
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25071) - you deserved it (5767)

On 12/10/2012 at 12:10am - money - by hailey - United States (Maryland)

Today, I found out my new girlfriend is a screamer. This would normally turn me on, except she sounds like she's being murdered with a rusty fork. FML

#20193609
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34542) - you deserved it (3984)

On 12/06/2012 at 9:24am - intimacy - by Dontwaketheneighbors (man) - United States (California)

Today, I bought my son a nice car for his 18th birthday. When I gave it to him, he just got mad and told me that if I really wanted to spend that much money on him, I should've used it to help him pay for college. FML

#20192045
269 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14729) - you deserved it (48558)

On 12/05/2012 at 6:27am - kids - by Anonymous - Israel

Today, my mom hung her new "Christmas Clock" on the wall. It plays a different Christmas carol every hour, on the hour. It's only December 2nd and I'm already starting to understand why suicide rates sky rocket this time of year. FML

#20188746
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22400) - you deserved it (2280)

On 12/02/2012 at 11:06pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my girlfriend confronted me for forgetting to take the trash out. At some point during the argument, I tried to calm her down, and the words "I should of" escaped my lips. She spent the next ten minutes calling me stupid and laughing at how my grammar goes to hell when I'm distressed. FML

#20185423
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17250) - you deserved it (4232)

On 11/30/2012 at 2:30pm - love - by Gus (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I had just had a shower, when I noticed that the mix of my shower gel and deodorant smelled like Lynx Dark Temptation. I was happy, as this is my favourite men's deodorant, until I realised I was happily sniffing my own boobs because they smelled like my ex-boyfriend. FML



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