Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

3051628

Offline (7 hours ago) | Search for a member

3051628

3Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Saturday 4 November 1995 (19 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 15343
  • Number of comments : 7
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About 3051628 : I suppose I can write a bit about myself. First off, my username has no true significance to it, it's an old number that I used to use for grade school. I've been on FML for a while now, it's one of my most favorite websites of all time. It's safe to say I've visited it nearly every day since happening upon it on a crappy day I was having. I'm a pretty laid back guy; I love listening to music, relaxing, and going on long walks alone. I'm currently studying at penn state to become a meteorologist. Also, while I'm not heavily into anime (or watching television often) some of my favorite shows happen to be anime. Some of them are Fullmetal Alchemist (2003 and Brotherhood), Yu Yu Hakusho Cowboy Bebop, and Samurai Champloo. My favorite color is blue and I have a deep appreciation for honesty and trustworthiness.
There, I guess that's enough

3051628's page activity

Visits<b>toxicLover28</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 10:34am<b>Saturn</b> - the 12/13/2014 at 3:47pm<b>krispy_kreme792</b> - the 12/10/2014 at 7:23am<b>Sora_McKain</b> - the 12/10/2014 at 6:06am<b>Just_A_Tree</b> - the 12/08/2014 at 9:29pm<b>SquidgyOmAm</b> - the 12/08/2014 at 8:01pm<b>Stillo</b> - the 12/08/2014 at 5:35pm<b>pureportedpear</b> - the 12/06/2014 at 11:47am<b>Lexasaurus7</b> - the 12/02/2014 at 10:41am<b>cheese7272</b> - the 11/23/2014 at 5:10am<b>KittehFreak</b> - the 11/13/2014 at 6:43pm<b>Suchadiva</b> - the 11/12/2014 at 2:01pm<b>Clmrt</b> - the 11/08/2014 at 5:11pm<b>BBlah</b> - the 11/06/2014 at 2:14pm<b>VorpikeII</b> - the 11/04/2014 at 2:30pm<b>shutupshane12</b> - the 10/27/2014 at 9:41am<b>RedNinjaTurtle</b> - the 10/14/2014 at 1:02am<b>iris2288fml</b> - the 09/20/2014 at 12:15pm

Liked!<b>BBlah</b> - the 11/06/2014 at 8:16pm<b>shutupshane12</b> - the 10/27/2014 at 2:41pm<b>iris2288fml</b> - the 09/20/2014 at 6:16pm

3051628's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

See all of 3051628's badges

3051628's favorite FMLs

Today, I woke up to the sound of someone having sex in the room next to me. I don't have a roommate. Turns out my mom thought I was out of town and used her extra key to bring a guy over for sex. FML

#8131977
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21638) - you deserved it (2002)

On 02/11/2010 at 2:40pm - intimacy - by yourstruly - United States (Georgia)

Today, my boyfriend decided to name his penis "Jesus". For the last two hours he's been continuously asking if I "want to be touched by Jesus" or will I "let Jesus in to spread his warmth." FML

#8119072
298 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20443) - you deserved it (4714)

On 02/11/2010 at 1:18am - intimacy - by syl - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I received multiple phone calls asking how much my Siamese cat cost. Too bad I never had a Siamese cat - let alone a Siamese cat up for sale. Turns out the guy I prank phone called the other day didn't appreciate it and put my number on Craigslist with an add for a Siamese cat. FML

#8078249
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (4533) - you deserved it (51170)

On 02/10/2010 at 1:39am - animals - by AUDONEE (woman) - United States (District of Columbia)

Today, I found out that my girlfriend feeds her boogers to our dog. Sometimes she even makes her do tricks for them. FML

#7925125
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30600) - you deserved it (3046)

On 02/06/2010 at 1:27am - animals - by btg - United States (California)

Today, I walked in on my boyfriend watching a home made sex tape he had previously made with his ex-girlfriend. What's worse than him jerking off to it? He was crying and hugging a pillow. FML

#7811688
221 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31688) - you deserved it (2620)

On 02/02/2010 at 10:40am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I found out that my girlfriend had replaced our picture in her locket for a picture of Taylor Lautner shirtless. FML

#7724225
258 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33189) - you deserved it (5618)

On 01/30/2010 at 10:20pm - love - by Twilightsux (man) - United States

Today, I was letting my boyfriend of 4 years tie me up and do stuff to me. After finishing on my face, he then left. My parents had to untie me. FML

#7609277
328 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42331) - you deserved it (11961)

On 01/27/2010 at 8:35am - intimacy - by chanclepants - Sent from mobile version

Today, my grandpa, a married high school teacher, got arrested for having an inappropriate relationship with a female student. Hearing the news, I called my grandma crying. Not only is he most likely going to jail, but in seven months I will have a new aunt who is eighteen years younger than me. FML

#7594942
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34472) - you deserved it (2085)

On 01/26/2010 at 7:09pm - misc - by newniece (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was bet 100 dollars that I couldn't break a piece off a brick with my head. I couldn't, and I have 2 gashes in my head now. FML

#7467254
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (4246) - you deserved it (64317)

On 01/21/2010 at 12:02am - misc - by anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I heard the sounds of women grunting in the living room. My husband knows I don't like him to watch porn, so I confronted him. He was masturbating to professional Women's tennis. FML

#7447854
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11341) - you deserved it (21510)

On 01/19/2010 at 10:46pm - intimacy - by sportyhusband (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I was in the line at Chipotle and noticed a very attractive lady in her mid 20's. I deliberately took the table next to her and her friend and happened to overhear what they were talking about. They were both discussing how much diarrhea they were going to have when they got home. FML

#7442500
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8342) - you deserved it (26746)

On 01/19/2010 at 7:08pm - misc - by maximus (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, my boyfriend humped me to the tune of the Imperial March from Star Wars. FML

#7398429
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19500) - you deserved it (5921)

On 01/17/2010 at 1:13pm - intimacy - by ChubbyTubby (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, my grandma told me to fuck off when I tried to help her with the dishes. FML

#7391871
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28843) - you deserved it (5816)

On 01/17/2010 at 1:31am - love - by volleyballgirl12 - Sent from mobile version

Today, my boyfriend took me to meet his friends at one of his exclusive "clubs." Expecting it to be his old friends from college, I agreed to go. Apparently, I've been dating a member of the Ku Klux Klan for 2 years. FML

#7380749
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61753) - you deserved it (7066)

On 01/16/2010 at 4:24pm - love - by Awkward (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I came home from a long day at work to find a path of rose pedals from the front door. Gasping with surprise, I followed it past the living room... past the bedroom... into the kitchen, where there was a note that said "Friends coming over tonight, we need food, love you!" FML

#7353628
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30259) - you deserved it (3624)

On 01/15/2010 at 3:33am - love - by Romantic (woman) - United States (Florida)



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • The Xmas illustrated FML
  • Here we go, final lap before Christmas is finally upon us. Although, you could say we've been subjected to quite a few strains of Christmas already. The decorations are up since mid-August, and certain family…

Friday 19 December 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: