Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

3051628

Online | Search for a member

3051628

5Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Saturday 4 November 1995 (19 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 18782
  • Number of comments : 8
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

About 3051628 : I suppose I can write a bit about myself. First off, my username has no true significance to it, it's an old number that I used to use for grade school. I've been on FML for a while now, it's one of my most favorite websites of all time. It's safe to say I've visited it nearly every day since happening upon it on a crappy day I was having. I'm a pretty laid back guy; I love listening to music, relaxing, and going on long walks alone. I'm currently studying at penn state to become a meteorologist. Also, while I'm not heavily into anime (or watching television often) some of my favorite shows happen to be anime. Some of them are Fullmetal Alchemist (2003 and Brotherhood), Yu Yu Hakusho Cowboy Bebop, and Samurai Champloo. My favorite color is blue and I have a deep appreciation for honesty and trustworthiness.
There, I guess that's enough

3051628's page activity

Visits<b>KimmieHappyKat</b> - yesterday at 4:10am<b>184886837272837</b> - yesterday at 11:06pm<b>patrickalamo</b> - the 01/29/2015 at 10:59pm<b>Exodiafinder687</b> - the 01/27/2015 at 7:23am<b>jojimugo</b> - the 01/25/2015 at 11:28pm<b>YouHaveANiceButt</b> - the 01/25/2015 at 4:09pm<b>stuckintime</b> - the 01/22/2015 at 6:49pm<b>shutupshane12</b> - the 01/21/2015 at 10:34am<b>MiguelDavila</b> - the 01/19/2015 at 12:12am<b>Georgiecan</b> - the 01/17/2015 at 7:35pm<b>Jerakl</b> - the 01/16/2015 at 3:47pm<b>royr7395</b> - the 01/15/2015 at 6:16pm<b>LeavenSilva</b> - the 01/12/2015 at 12:53pm<b>hurtfeet</b> - the 01/04/2015 at 12:00pm<b>Wolfparable</b> - the 01/03/2015 at 12:08pm<b>ordinarygent</b> - the 01/02/2015 at 1:44am<b>Haggis300</b> - the 12/29/2014 at 6:56pm<b>EKDH</b> - the 12/29/2014 at 10:12am

Liked!<b>patrickalamo</b> - the 01/29/2015 at 3:58pm<b>Exodiafinder687</b> - the 01/27/2015 at 1:23pm<b>BBlah</b> - the 11/06/2014 at 8:16pm<b>shutupshane12</b> - the 10/27/2014 at 2:41pm<b>iris2288fml</b> - the 09/20/2014 at 6:16pm

3051628's FML badges

Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of 3051628's badges

3051628's favorite FMLs

Today, I walked into the kitchen at the exact moment my uncle decided to bend over in short shorts. Apparently, his ballsack decided it needed extra room, because it dangled out of his pant leg. FML

#21283844
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35808) - you deserved it (2923)

On 10/23/2014 at 4:05pm - misc - by Alexismaria - United States

Today, I was passing notes in class with my crush. I started to pour my heart out and tell him about how I've liked him for years. I was caught by the teacher. He looked at it, laughed, and tore it up. He then looked at me and said, "I just saved you from years of embarrassment. You're welcome." FML

#21283544
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38015) - you deserved it (10031)

On 10/23/2014 at 12:04am - love - by Rachel - United States (Ohio)

Today, I had sex for the first time with my first boyfriend. We broke up 6 years ago. FML

Today, I tried to seduce my boyfriend so I mounted him and began kissing him. He immediately pretended to snore into my mouth and rolled over, making me fall off of the bed. FML

#21283230
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31512) - you deserved it (4127)

On 10/22/2014 at 5:24pm - intimacy - by CJune24 (woman) - United Kingdom (Kirklees)

Today, after my dad trying every bait, hormone, and poison, the cockroaches in this apartment have gone crazy. They are trying to kill themselves. One tried to commit suicide, by suffocation, in my mouth this morning. FML

#21282365
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35711) - you deserved it (3136)

On 10/21/2014 at 11:42am - misc - by youngboob (woman) - United States (Kansas)

Today, I came out as bisexual to my friends via group message. They didn't respond; I had a panic attack. An hour later, one of my friends texted back, "k". FML

Today, I was shopping when a woman stopped me and asked me what lipgloss I was wearing because my lips looked gorgeous. I had to explain to her it was just the grease from the Slim Jim I had just eaten. FML

#21281977
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29973) - you deserved it (4760)

On 10/20/2014 at 8:38pm - misc - by Anonymos_fmler - United States (Illinois)

Today, my boss drove past me while I was walking to work, and splashing mud over my uniform. When I got to work, he criticized me for showing up in unpresentable condition. FML

#21281679
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36035) - you deserved it (2454)

On 10/20/2014 at 11:03am - work - by Chansus10 - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I went on a first date. Everything was going well until he asked me, "So, what's the biggest thing you've stuck up your vag?" FML

#21281604
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38098) - you deserved it (2771)

On 10/20/2014 at 5:28am - intimacy - by bye loser (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was skating in the city when I slipped and fractured my arm. As I was lying in pain, a guy walked up to me, frisked my pocket and took my wallet. He then said: "It's nothing personal." FML

#21281599
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36779) - you deserved it (2931)

On 10/20/2014 at 4:50am - misc - by ColdStones (man) - Norway (Hordaland)

Today, I found a book in my attic that I always read when I was a kid. For old times sake I read it again. On the very first page, child me had written, "Go to page 15" so I did. On page 15, in big red letters, it said, "Get bent". I got pranked by myself. FML

#21281163
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29777) - you deserved it (7884)

On 10/19/2014 at 3:27pm - misc - by Deadpool434 (man) - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, I walked in on my boyfriend jerking off to what I thought was porn on his phone. He was actually beating it to Siri's voice. FML

#21280577
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36794) - you deserved it (3442)

On 10/18/2014 at 5:43pm - intimacy - by fizzie101 - United States (California)

Today, I confronted my girlfriend after catching her cheating on me. After she finished crying, she had the brass balls to say she'd understand if I needed a couple of weeks to forgive her, and asked me for bus fare so she could go tell the other guy they could only be friends now. FML

#21280490
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37666) - you deserved it (3049)

On 10/18/2014 at 2:44pm - love - by yee-whore (man) - United States (Vermont)

Today, I woke up to my daughter crying, and my son running through the living room completely naked with her bottle, laughing his head off. FML

#21279992
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29020) - you deserved it (3073)

On 10/17/2014 at 6:30pm - kids - by KayyElOh94 - United States

Today, I climbed onto my boyfriend's lap and sexily told him "It's getting hot in here," and started unbuttoning my shirt. He said "Oh," pushed me off him, and went to turn the ceiling fan on. FML

#21279866
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39372) - you deserved it (5537)

On 10/17/2014 at 2:29pm - intimacy - by gettinghotinhere - United States (California)



Ronald Grandpey's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Ronald Grandpey's illustrated FML
  • Hello everyone, how's it going? You doing OK? Friday is the right time to get your glad rags on, go out, meet your friends, have a drink, get your freak on, shoot the breeze, shoot some hoops, don't shoot…

Friday 30 January 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: