Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

3051628

Offline (7 hours ago) | Search for a member

3051628

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Saturday 4 November 1995 (18 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 10487
  • Number of comments : 5
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About 3051628 : I suppose I can write a bit about myself. First off, my username has no true significance to it, it's an old number that I used to use for grade school. I've been on FML for a while now, it's one of my most favorite websites of all time. It's safe to say I've visited it nearly every day since happening upon it on a crappy day I was having. I'm a pretty laid back guy; I love listening to music, relaxing, and going on long walks alone. I'm currently studying at penn state to become a meteorologist. Also, while I'm not heavily into anime (or watching television often) some of my favorite shows happen to be anime. Some of them are Fullmetal Alchemist (2003 and Brotherhood), Yu Yu Hakusho Cowboy Bebop, and Samurai Champloo. My favorite color is blue and I have a deep appreciation for honesty and trustworthiness.
There, I guess that's enough

3051628's page activity

Visits<b>MARGIE9</b> - the 09/14/2014 at 9:54am<b>SkittlesGoRawr</b> - the 09/10/2014 at 4:20pm<b>Ayezed</b> - the 09/04/2014 at 9:50am<b>emmaaadotcom</b> - the 08/30/2014 at 10:43pm<b>kAPISH</b> - the 08/28/2014 at 10:36pm<b>PhantomFollower</b> - the 08/27/2014 at 5:34pm<b>HalloweenQueen18</b> - the 08/26/2014 at 9:02am<b>ApologyKick</b> - the 08/20/2014 at 11:40pm<b>Kyle1dc</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 2:16pm<b>Mornai</b> - the 08/15/2014 at 10:44am<b>Vanillanougat</b> - the 08/13/2014 at 3:37pm<b>WizardlyUnicorn</b> - the 08/10/2014 at 6:46pm<b>Welshite</b> - the 08/05/2014 at 6:47am<b>DJisHere11</b> - the 08/04/2014 at 6:09pm<b>RoseWithThorns</b> - the 08/03/2014 at 11:27pm<b>Amber_Naomy</b> - the 08/03/2014 at 4:27pm<b>OhWhoCares</b> - the 08/03/2014 at 11:43am<b>qwertsarecool122</b> - the 07/30/2014 at 12:51am

3051628's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

See all of 3051628's badges

3051628's favorite FMLs

Today, my girlfriend stuck her finger up my butt while giving me a hand-job, promising it would feel really good. It just felt awkward and made me need to poop. FML

#19703392
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35004) - you deserved it (8643)

On 05/30/2012 at 5:46am - intimacy - by Brax (man) - United States

Today, after a surprise candlelit dinner and a two bottles of wine for my birthday, my boyfriend and I decided to take a sexy shower together. It ended with us both drunk, naked, and crying, wedged into a small tub together, talking about our dead pets. FML

#19702897
201 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30634) - you deserved it (7421)

On 05/30/2012 at 1:46am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I got stuck in a three-hour traffic jam because I sneezed and missed the road I was meant to take. FML

#19700381
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22311) - you deserved it (4215)

On 05/29/2012 at 6:24pm - misc - by blocked (man) - United States

Today, I introduced my boyfriend to my parents. My dad turns around and says he was expecting him to have a guide dog. This is why I don't have much confidence in myself. FML

#19690417
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23956) - you deserved it (1717)

On 05/27/2012 at 8:31pm - misc - by hitnmiss66 (woman) - United Kingdom (Birmingham)

Today, my grandmother was driving me to the mall. Suddenly, she stopped in the middle of the road. When I asked her what exactly she was doing, she said, "Oh, am I driving?" FML

#19685712
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25761) - you deserved it (1831)

On 05/26/2012 at 9:48pm - misc - by anonymus - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I went into my classroom to find a bag of shit on my desk with a note saying, "Thanks for failing me b*tch!" FML

#19670939
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21713) - you deserved it (6773)

On 05/24/2012 at 12:59am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I was to give a presentation to several of my company's senior employees. The moment I stood up, I accidentally let rip a monstrous fart that lasted a good two or three seconds. When I tried to utter an apology, I clammed up and let out a whiny grunt. They were not amused. FML

#19668387
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20673) - you deserved it (4405)

On 05/23/2012 at 4:38pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, my boyfriend ended our relationship. He called me from his mobile phone, claimed to be a trauma surgeon, and told me with a bad German accent that my "boyfriend" had been in a fatal car crash earlier in the day. What the hell is wrong with this idiot? FML

#19667641
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29626) - you deserved it (3831)

On 05/23/2012 at 1:20pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Switzerland (Zurich)

Today, I found out that my little brother has been rubbing my toothbrush in dog shit for the last month because I accidentally broke one of his toys. FML

#19664729
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25036) - you deserved it (4074)

On 05/22/2012 at 9:24pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States

Today, after spending about 5 grand on my home studio over the past year, I realized I have no musical talent whatsoever. FML

#19660967
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7068) - you deserved it (33033)

On 05/22/2012 at 3:34am - misc - by gaga - United States (California)

Today, my husband and I were pulled over by a cop. He was still angry from our earlier argument over his constant freeloading, and when the cop told him we'd been doing 75 in a 55, he retorted, "Yeah? I did 75 in your mom last night, fuzzball." One more ticket I have to pay for. FML

#19644251
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23388) - you deserved it (4753)

On 05/18/2012 at 10:41pm - money - by me (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was at the laundromat when a huge, tattoo-covered man wearing nothing but denim booty shorts and a wife-beater sat down beside me. He stared at me for a while, before telling me all about how I reminded him of his "first prison bitch." FML

#19644212
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25146) - you deserved it (1932)

On 05/18/2012 at 10:35pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I came home to find a note on my door from the neighbor saying "I saw a coyote eat your dog, but was afraid it was rabid." FML

#19640596
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27821) - you deserved it (2226)

On 05/18/2012 at 3:22am - animals - by nick - United States

Today, I had to collect my daughter from the hospital. Her boyfriend was even more upset than she was, because his iPhone's screen was damaged beyond repair when the doctor pulled it out of my daughter's vagina. FML

#19631928
475 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47164) - you deserved it (4370)

On 05/16/2012 at 12:10pm - intimacy - by smart move there (woman) - Ireland (Kildare)

Today, a pigeon got into my apartment. After knocking over a very expensive vase, it panicked, rammed itself against a window, and shat all over the floor as it tried to get out. FML

#19611512
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19022) - you deserved it (1748)

On 05/12/2012 at 12:01pm - animals - by Eric Ngan - Singapore



Korrig'Anne's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Korrig'Anne's illustrated FML
  • So, have you ordered it? Have you got it? No? Yes? Do you know any idea of what I'm talking about? OK, for the normal people, I'm talking about the new iPhone 6. Apparently, it came out today. I'm not…

Friday 19 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: