Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

3051628

Offline (one hour ago) | Search for a member

3051628

3Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Saturday 4 November 1995 (19 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 15198
  • Number of comments : 7
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About 3051628 : I suppose I can write a bit about myself. First off, my username has no true significance to it, it's an old number that I used to use for grade school. I've been on FML for a while now, it's one of my most favorite websites of all time. It's safe to say I've visited it nearly every day since happening upon it on a crappy day I was having. I'm a pretty laid back guy; I love listening to music, relaxing, and going on long walks alone. I'm currently studying at penn state to become a meteorologist. Also, while I'm not heavily into anime (or watching television often) some of my favorite shows happen to be anime. Some of them are Fullmetal Alchemist (2003 and Brotherhood), Yu Yu Hakusho Cowboy Bebop, and Samurai Champloo. My favorite color is blue and I have a deep appreciation for honesty and trustworthiness.
There, I guess that's enough

3051628's page activity

Visits<b>toxicLover28</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 10:34am<b>Saturn</b> - the 12/13/2014 at 3:47pm<b>krispy_kreme792</b> - the 12/10/2014 at 7:23am<b>Sora_McKain</b> - the 12/10/2014 at 6:06am<b>Just_A_Tree</b> - the 12/08/2014 at 9:29pm<b>SquidgyOmAm</b> - the 12/08/2014 at 8:01pm<b>Stillo</b> - the 12/08/2014 at 5:35pm<b>pureportedpear</b> - the 12/06/2014 at 11:47am<b>Lexasaurus7</b> - the 12/02/2014 at 10:41am<b>cheese7272</b> - the 11/23/2014 at 5:10am<b>KittehFreak</b> - the 11/13/2014 at 6:43pm<b>Suchadiva</b> - the 11/12/2014 at 2:01pm<b>Clmrt</b> - the 11/08/2014 at 5:11pm<b>BBlah</b> - the 11/06/2014 at 2:14pm<b>VorpikeII</b> - the 11/04/2014 at 2:30pm<b>shutupshane12</b> - the 10/27/2014 at 9:41am<b>RedNinjaTurtle</b> - the 10/14/2014 at 1:02am<b>iris2288fml</b> - the 09/20/2014 at 12:15pm

Liked!<b>BBlah</b> - the 11/06/2014 at 8:16pm<b>shutupshane12</b> - the 10/27/2014 at 2:41pm<b>iris2288fml</b> - the 09/20/2014 at 6:16pm

3051628's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

See all of 3051628's badges

3051628's favorite FMLs

Today, walking by myself, I was caught up in a group of people that got arrested, and we all got fined for creating a public disturbance. When I explained I wasn't with them, the group backed me up. The police thought I was the ringleader, and now I have to go to court. FML

#20639737
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59058) - you deserved it (3400)

On 05/03/2013 at 9:14pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Netherlands

Today, my wife shaved her pubic hair so that it resembles Hitler's mustache. She won't stop referring to it as "the Clitler". FML

#20637691
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60547) - you deserved it (9147)

On 05/02/2013 at 8:50pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I walked in on my sister apparently trying to eat herself out. FML

#20637584
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (70001) - you deserved it (7862)

On 05/02/2013 at 7:54pm - intimacy - by future brain bleach addict (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my dog had her stomach pumped because she ate some cookies. The 100 cookies I made for a bake sale to be exact. FML

#20636616
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39451) - you deserved it (6163)

On 05/02/2013 at 8:50am - animals - by Anonymous - Canada (Alberta)

Today, the neighbors in the next apartment reported me to the police for screaming at my newborn to "shut the hell up" every time he cries. I would never yell at my baby. My asshole of a dog on the other hand barks at everything, which terrifies the baby, causing him to cry. FML

Today, my former fiancée, who I stopped seeing 5 months ago, married another guy. She wore the dress that I'd purchased for our would-be wedding. FML

#20630309
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56631) - you deserved it (5236)

On 04/29/2013 at 1:07pm - love - by Good Luck Chuck (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, a family of geese nested outside my halls of residence. They have started attacking everyone who tries to get in or out of the building. I'm basically being placed under house arrest by birds. FML

#20630234
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41870) - you deserved it (3557)

On 04/29/2013 at 12:14pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (York)

Today, my dog became scared of his own food bowl. He now barks for ages every time he sees it. FML

#20629727
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36233) - you deserved it (3033)

On 04/29/2013 at 3:20am - animals - by conbon123 - United States (Oregon)

Today, I summoned the courage to call my abusive mother-in-law about her non-payment of the money I stupidly lent her last year. She replied, "Why don't you go deepthroat a cactus, then we'll talk about it, cunt." and then hung up on me. FML

#20628087
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53287) - you deserved it (6560)

On 04/28/2013 at 4:44pm - money - by a tad whipped (man) - Australia

Today, I got caught masturbating, twice, by the same person. FML

#20627981
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33632) - you deserved it (69399)

On 04/28/2013 at 3:53pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Saudi Arabia

Today, my whole family made an hour-long drive to a restaurant that's just a few minutes away from my place. I wasn't invited. FML

#20626789
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45406) - you deserved it (3103)

On 04/28/2013 at 1:23am - misc - by lonesome - Canada

Today, I was walking through a rough part of town, when a woman screamed that I'd stolen her bag. I was tackled to the ground by a large guy, who then gave my bag to her. FML

#20624598
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52315) - you deserved it (3293)

On 04/27/2013 at 4:28am - misc - by whathehell (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I was getting ready to have sex with my boyfriend for the first time. It seems he thought I was a much larger cup size than I really am, because when he saw my actual boobs, he said, "Aaaaaaand they're gone". FML

#20624343
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63385) - you deserved it (14249)

On 04/27/2013 at 12:11am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend in public. She happily said yes, and the surrounding crowd cheered for us. About 10 minutes later, after the excitement died down, she leaned over and quietly said, "Actually, I don't want to marry you. I only said yes so I wouldn't disappoint the crowd." FML

#20622674
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (73094) - you deserved it (10057)

On 04/26/2013 at 5:17am - love - by Anonymous -

Today, as I was walking down the street, a car full of hot girls pulled up and asked if I wanted to party; obviously, I said yes. They then shot at me with party poppers and threw party food all over me. FML

#20622653
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41701) - you deserved it (8903)

On 04/26/2013 at 4:36am - misc - by KingUrge (man) - United States (California)



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • The Xmas illustrated FML
  • Here we go, final lap before Christmas is finally upon us. Although, you could say we've been subjected to quite a few strains of Christmas already. The decorations are up since mid-August, and certain family…

Friday 19 December 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: