Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

3051628

Online | Search for a member

3051628

18Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Saturday 4 November 1995 (19 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 25805
  • Number of comments : 10
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

About 3051628 : Currently a second semester sophomore at Pennsylvania State University, and I'm studying for a bachelor's in meteorology. Also, I skipped a grade and graduated with honors when I was 17. I live in Virginia, but I'm originally from Ohio. In general I'm a pretty laid back guy and I love listening to music from pretty much any genre.

I'm not really sure what else to put: if there's something else you'd like to know, feel free to message me. Be warned though, I'm pretty much only on FML via the app and I'm not the best at responding to messages on here.

3051628's page activity

Visits<b>MissDarkness</b> - the 05/21/2015 at 7:01pm<b>saffy66</b> - the 05/20/2015 at 12:57am<b>UkeSenpai</b> - the 05/11/2015 at 3:35am<b>jackroarrr</b> - the 05/07/2015 at 9:04am<b>omutine</b> - the 05/07/2015 at 2:48am<b>the_aspect</b> - the 05/02/2015 at 6:17pm<b>exitium16</b> - the 05/02/2015 at 6:03pm<b>Iwtumn</b> - the 05/01/2015 at 9:14am<b>lucythomson</b> - the 05/01/2015 at 5:55am<b>J3WP33T4H</b> - the 04/29/2015 at 11:01am<b>Acerhawk</b> - the 04/29/2015 at 6:51am<b>swanheart</b> - the 04/29/2015 at 6:06am<b>LoganGillease</b> - the 04/23/2015 at 6:41pm<b>MaybeMoo</b> - the 04/22/2015 at 5:24pm<b>klutzyduck1</b> - the 04/20/2015 at 4:30pm<b>martin8337</b> - the 04/19/2015 at 11:56pm<b>0XBlazeX0</b> - the 04/19/2015 at 11:15pm<b>ElMungia</b> - the 04/18/2015 at 4:16am

Fucked!<b>Acerhawk</b> - the 04/29/2015 at 3:17am<b>swanheart</b> - the 04/22/2015 at 11:23am<b>martin8337</b> - the 04/19/2015 at 5:16am<b>ElMungia</b> - the 04/14/2015 at 11:10am<b>cheesyfeet2001</b> - the 04/09/2015 at 3:56pm<b>Lesser</b> - the 04/07/2015 at 9:27pm<b>the_aspect</b> - the 04/07/2015 at 3:01am<b>boredSOLDIER</b> - the 03/01/2015 at 6:18pm<b>je_suis_petit</b> - the 02/23/2015 at 5:51pm<b>SlowDownImaNoob</b> - the 02/10/2015 at 7:00pm<b>Firegirl741</b> - the 02/09/2015 at 6:58am<b>watermelon15</b> - the 02/08/2015 at 6:19am<b>HighasaCloud</b> - the 02/06/2015 at 12:38am<b>patrickalamo</b> - the 01/29/2015 at 3:58pm<b>Exodiafinder687</b> - the 01/27/2015 at 1:23pm<b>BBlah</b> - the 11/06/2014 at 8:16pm<b>shutupshane12</b> - the 10/27/2014 at 2:41pm<b>iris2288fml</b> - the 09/20/2014 at 6:16pm

3051628's FML badges

Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of 3051628's badges

3051628's favorite FMLs

Today, I placed a Bible app next to an app I use for porn, in the hope that it will encourage me to watch less porn. I'm a girl. FML

Today, after my parents left for the weekend, my "friends" decided to throw a party at my house despite my protests. In order to get them to leave, I called the police. I was the only one arrested, while they got warnings. FML

#20783919
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48128) - you deserved it (8466)

On 07/15/2013 at 7:46am - misc - by ugh - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my naked boyfriend walked up to me with my towel around his neck and with a hard-on, then declared he was "The Penis Man" and slapped me with his junk. I thought I was dating a man, not a man-child. FML

#20782097
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49784) - you deserved it (17053)

On 07/14/2013 at 1:03pm - intimacy - by peniswoman (woman) - United Kingdom (Renfrewshire)

Today, one of my co-workers was fired after my manager discovered him pissing in the office coffee pot. I had three cups before I found out what had happened. FML

#20780355
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51534) - you deserved it (4126)

On 07/13/2013 at 5:10pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Maryland)

Today, I was browsing porn in my room, when my dad barged in. I quickly switched to another tab, only to see it was parked on another porn page. I had another browser window open, so I switched to that. More porn. My dad said, "Riiiggghhhttt... You need help, son." FML

#20779957
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28597) - you deserved it (56014)

On 07/13/2013 at 1:22pm - misc - by fuck (man) - United Kingdom (Surrey)

Today, the guy I like asked me what he should do for the girl he has a crush on. I told him to give her flowers and tell her how he feels. Later that day my doorbell rang, and he stood there holding flowers. He said the magical words, "My car broke down, can you give me a lift?" FML

#20778979
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65710) - you deserved it (4907)

On 07/13/2013 at 12:22am - love - by Stacy (woman) - United States

Today, my 15-year-old daughter's pregnancy test came back positive. I wanted to know who the father is, so I could sit the two of them down to talk the situation through with them. She isn't sure if it's her best friend, or our neighbor's son. FML

#20777059
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64941) - you deserved it (11421)

On 07/12/2013 at 1:19am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my 13-year-old daughter and I went to a tropical themed restaurant. She wanted a strawberry Daiquiri, so I asked the waitress for a virgin strawberry Daiquiri. My daughter then said, "But dad, I'm not a virgin." FML

#20775827
337 comments

I agree, your life sucks (100207) - you deserved it (11698)

On 07/11/2013 at 10:24am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I walked to work. I later discovered that my husband had parked my car in a no-parking area. My job is towing cars. I had to tow my own car. FML

#20775203
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51568) - you deserved it (5333)

On 07/10/2013 at 11:04pm - work - by Anonymous -

Today, while having a serious talk with my father, he said, "Son, you're only alive because of a faulty, off-brand condom." FML

#20774202
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48862) - you deserved it (3472)

On 07/10/2013 at 12:33pm - misc - by my honest father - United States (Kansas)

Today, after a haircut, I walked to the cash register, handed the hairdresser a $20 bill and said, "Keep the change." He looked at me with a blank expression and replied, "The haircut costs 25 dollars." FML

#20773985
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30518) - you deserved it (46887)

On 07/10/2013 at 8:38am - misc - by RickTheBoy (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I went to a big job interview. Eventually, the guy subtly enquired about my political beliefs. He seemed pretty laid-back and cool, so I told him, at which point he just chuckled and told me to leave. When I threatened to report him, he just said, "Who're they gonna believe, you or me?" FML

#20769050
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41796) - you deserved it (7514)

On 07/07/2013 at 5:27pm - work - by touche :/ (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boyfriend nicknamed my vagina after a local waterpark. It wasn't even that annoying until his friends started asking me how much I charged to let people "ride n' slide". FML

#20768896
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54935) - you deserved it (5728)

On 07/07/2013 at 4:07pm - intimacy - by roseland (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I realized that I am such a Grammar Nazi that when a porn star says something grammatically-incorrect, I lose my boner. FML

#20766909
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48865) - you deserved it (19597)

On 07/06/2013 at 11:42am - misc - by BlueB (man) - United States

Today, I found out why my bank balance is so unusually low. It turns out that I bought a car in Indonesia. I've never been to Indonesia. FML

#20766607
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53807) - you deserved it (3205)

On 07/06/2013 at 3:45am - money - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Essex)



FML's blog

  • JT's illustrated FML
  • Hello everybody, how's it going? This week we're looking at the delicate art of getting along with your neighbours. If you've ever lived in an apartment building, you'll know that having people live…

Friday 22 May 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: