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Offline (the 10/09/2014 at 5:46pm) | Search for a member
About 184886837272837 : I am a dude who wears skinny jeans... I like brownies and stealing fire extinguishers to play with. I am conservative in some ways (pro gun) and liberal in others (pro legalization), if anyone wants a friendly political debate I'm open to it :). I get a massive hard on for nice knives. I'm all about fixed blade fighters, karambits, balisongs, tactical folders, switch blades and throwing daggers. You buy me a Benchmade, Spyderco or any knife at all and I'll love you forever. I have some hacking skills. I'm an activist of the internets! We see, we judge, we act. I'll say something that will cause butthurt. Fuck censorship, speech is free. Fuck intellectual property, information is free. Fuck NDAA and HR347 (ask what those are), people are free. If you like memes then you'll find it cool that I have met the Lazy College Senior in real life! My Bio is getting too long so I have to stop now. Shrek is love. Shrek is life.
This isn't what should be happening
You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.
Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.
That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.
Today, I came home after working on a difficult case. My husband wasn't home so I hopped into bed. My feet felt something and I reached down and picked it up out of the sheets. It was lacy black thongs. I don't own black thongs. FML
Today, I went on a blind date. The girl seemed perfect for me, until I found out she says "lol" and "rofl" out loud whenever she laughs. She also believes sex screws with people's "spiritual energy", and that's why she'll never have it. FML
Today, my weird neighbor is a conspiracy theorist and thinks the government is trying to kill him. Someone thought it would be funny to shine a red laser light through his window. I was on the stairs when he ran past, screaming bloody murder, sending me down a flight of steps. FML
Today, I was going to have sex with my Hispanic boyfriend. I wanted to turn him on, so I asked my friend how to say "fuck me" in Spanish. She claimed it was 'pollo frito'. I then had sex, constantly screaming 'pollo frito' for an hour. I later realized I was screaming "fried chicken." FML
Friday 17 October 2014