149967

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149967

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 4493
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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149967's page activity

Visits<b>mirandaelcraig</b> - the 02/04/2016 at 1:53pm<b>way2go</b> - the 03/28/2014 at 2:54pm<b>kikikiju</b> - the 03/17/2014 at 5:16am<b>1tsmenoah</b> - the 01/15/2014 at 10:25pm<b>L2U7A_E5I9A2E8H</b> - the 01/11/2014 at 9:32pm<b>BigSquishy23</b> - the 12/22/2013 at 10:58pm<b>refticon</b> - the 12/13/2013 at 12:03pm<b>Welshite</b> - the 12/11/2013 at 7:04am<b>olpally</b> - the 12/10/2013 at 11:23pm<b>xnyletak</b> - the 12/06/2013 at 9:51pm<b>cryingonions</b> - the 12/05/2013 at 4:57pm<b>desidog</b> - the 12/02/2013 at 1:52pm<b>DessaChan</b> - the 12/01/2013 at 6:05pm<b>mesutozil11</b> - the 11/30/2013 at 8:02am<b>Wizardo</b> - the 11/30/2013 at 7:56am<b>DenBriZel</b> - the 11/27/2013 at 4:29am<b>BMTHsuperfan</b> - the 11/19/2013 at 8:35pm<b>basicperfection</b> - the 11/17/2013 at 12:44pm

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149967's favorite FMLs

Today, I was sleeping because I had been sick. The closest bathroom to mine is the one in my parents room. I wake up and feel like I have to throw up, I run into my parents room to go to the bathroom. I walk in on my parents having sex. Shocked, I gasp for air then throw up all over their bed. FML

by Noname / 02/26/2009 at 11:02pm / United States (New Jersey) / Intimacy

Today, my guy friend and I were in his dorm room watching a movie when he started kissing me. Things heated up so we moved things over to his bed. He was on me when a hand shoots down from his top bunk. His roommate had been up there the whole time and he wanted a high-five. So they high-fived. FML

by Menareidiots / 02/24/2009 at 6:32pm / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, I called my boyfriend crying to tell him I had the most terrible day. He said I should come over, and he would make me feel better. I said I just want to snuggle, and I was impressed with his sincerity. Then he said, "Can we snuggle... with my dick in you?" FML

by addictedtofml / 02/24/2009 at 2:31am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Intimacy

Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend for the first time, and she asked me if I ever get made fun of in the locker room for my small penis. FML

by Mike / 02/21/2009 at 5:24pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, I was masturbating on my inflatable air mattress that squeaks when you move. Suddenly, my mom busted in my room to ask if I'm okay because she thought the squeaking was my crying. I ripped my hands from my pants and turned on my side; she walked over and grabbed my hands to console me. FML

by dirtyhands / 02/18/2009 at 6:01pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy

Today, I was talking to my parents about feeling insecure with my "beach body" as Spring Break keeps getting closer and closer. My dad warned me by saying, "Don't wear a gray swimsuit. People will try to roll you back into the ocean". FML

by Shamu / 02/13/2009 at 7:15pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, I listened to my room mate having sex from 3 A.M. until 6 A.M. When I looked over at my girlfriend, who must have thought I was sleeping, I noticed she was masturbating. FML

by skipper / 02/12/2009 at 12:25pm / United States (Tennessee) / Intimacy

Today, I was on the internet with my Dad looking up information about allergies. I began to type 'allergies' into the Google Search Box and as I typed 'a', the phrase 'amazing sex positions' popped up as a search I had already looked up. My Dad asked me if any of the positions worked out. FML

by Noname / 02/10/2009 at 3:46pm / United States (Illinois) / Intimacy

Today, I found some porn videos in my parents room. I put them in and began to toss off, but as the camera moved up I realized it was my mom and my step-dad. FML

by Noname / 02/06/2009 at 1:25pm / United States (Oregon) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had a wet dream. When I woke up, I was touching myself. Unfortunately, I also woke up to find that I had fallen asleep on the couch after eating too much at a family reunion. When I looked around the room, over 10 relatives were giving me nasty looks. FML

by frankrizzo / 02/01/2009 at 12:29pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, I woke up with a hangover, but went to school anyway without showering, applying makeup, and still wearing my pajama bottoms. While taking the subway, I bumped into my ex-boyfriend who I hadn't seen a year. His new girlfriend looked at me and said, "You look... tired." FML

by babygurl69 / 01/20/2009 at 4:38pm / Canada (Ontario) / Transportation

Today, I was watching TV and realised I am attracted to Sandra Oh. FML

by Noname / 01/19/2009 at 6:12pm / Australia (Queensland) / Love

Today, my man and I were having sex on edge of bed. We were using chocolate spread and I was riding him. When we were done, he got up and I noticed a long brown line on the edge of the bed. I knelt down to smell it. It was NOT chocolate. FML

by Poopy / 01/12/2009 at 11:19am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend and I were looking for our bubblegum flavored "numbing" lotion to have some morning fun. We couldnt find it anywhere. After about 10 minutes, my little nephew comes from my room crying and drool coming out of his mouth. He smelt like bubblegum, his mouth and tongue were all numb. FML

by LiLGeek / 01/12/2009 at 10:37am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I got drunk and hooked up with some random chick. Later, I found out she's Facebook friends with my girlfriend. They used to be best friends when the girl was a senior. Small world. FML

by Noname / 01/11/2009 at 2:13pm / United States (Virginia) / Love