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Consolation prize
Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.
Today, I was digging in the backyard when my mom came out, nodded her head approvingly, and with a straight face told me it was good practice for when I inevitably go to prison. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19769) - you deserved it (3551)
On 09/04/2011 at 1:05pm - work - by mike - United States
Today, my paranoid wreck of a girlfriend read a text message on my phone from a woman asking if I was coming over for dinner. The woman was my mom. My girlfriend stormed out and hasn't answered my calls all day. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22019) - you deserved it (2628)
On 09/04/2011 at 12:08pm - love - by mommydearest (man) - Denmark (Nordjylland)
Today, I lost my cat. It's deaf, so no matter what I do it can't hear me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34956) - you deserved it (3495)
On 03/09/2011 at 3:03pm - animals - by blahhlovely_30 (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I was getting dirty looks on the train whilst air strumming the guitar to a song on my iPod, after glancing at the reflection in the window I realized it looked like I was masturbating. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13129) - you deserved it (29198)
On 03/09/2011 at 2:37pm - intimacy - by anonymouse - Reserved
Today, I was walking with my crush, and I told him how I felt. As soon as I turned to him, a bird shit on my face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (41901) - you deserved it (3413)
On 03/09/2011 at 1:19pm - love - by crazystar69 (woman) - United States (California)
Today, my boyfriend called me and dumped me. Thirty minutes later he called asking for me back. When I asked why, he said "The other girl dumped me." FML
I agree, your life sucks (36036) - you deserved it (3170)
On 03/09/2011 at 3:27am - love - by life_isnt_fair (woman) - United States (Kentucky)
Today, I found my mother in tears, so I asked her what was wrong. She told me, "It's your father, he wants a divorce..." I asked if he'd met another woman, and my mom replied "No, not a woman..." FML
I agree, your life sucks (45160) - you deserved it (3521) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 03/05/2011 at 6:43am - love - by Anonymous - France (Alsace)
Today, my mother noticed that I hadn't taken the trash out in a few weeks and angry, piled various full trash bags on my bed. I've been away on holiday for the past three weeks, I guess she didn't notice that part. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25576) - you deserved it (2451)
On 03/04/2011 at 11:25am - misc - by carr (woman) - Sent from mobile version
Today, while bored at work I was reading an article online about the local zoo and its animals. I received an email so quickly responded, but when signing off accidentally wrote "thanks hippo" instead of "thanks heaps". To a woman with a weight problem. Who also outranks me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11105) - you deserved it (18880)
On 03/04/2011 at 2:13am - work - by sharni88 (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)
Today, my parents told me that due to my lacking height and weight, I legally have to sit in a booster seat in the car from now on. I'm nineteen. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37602) - you deserved it (4397)
On 03/03/2011 at 6:18pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Georgia)
Today, I was out skating with a guy I really like. I put on my best moves, to impress him. I ended up slicing his lip open with my skate mid-jump. His lip is now wired shut by twelve stitches. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12363) - you deserved it (23708)
On 03/02/2011 at 4:26pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Michigan)
Today, while watching Animal Planet, I realised my boyfriend uses the Dog Whisperer techniques on me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23910) - you deserved it (6953)
On 02/28/2011 at 5:55am - love - by notagoodsign (woman) - Netherlands (Noord-Holland)
Today, I was going down on my girlfriend. I thought everything was going well, then all of a sudden she gets up and screams at me "IT'S NOT A TACO EATING COMPETITION, CHILL OUT." FML
I agree, your life sucks (17804) - you deserved it (36494)
On 02/23/2011 at 5:06am - intimacy - by failed (man) - Switzerland (Vaud)
Today, after some passionate love making with my husband, I accidentally farted on his leg. He shrieked and frantically began shaking his leg while screaming, "Get it off! Get it off!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (16307) - you deserved it (24433)
On 02/22/2011 at 4:02pm - intimacy - by CutieBooty (woman) - United States (Illinois)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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