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About 1432lmfao : Blahblahblah , :)
I walk by clocks just to pass time .
My hobbies are eating , running, sleeping and playing xbox :) cod 4modern warfare .
How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, the airport security guard told me to lift my fat rolls so he could finish patting me down. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17523) - you deserved it (30915)
On 07/17/2010 at 2:16am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I woke up to my boyfriend jumping on my bed exclaiming that he had "won the lottery." He broke the bed. Turns out he only won £15.80. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21908) - you deserved it (1952)
On 07/10/2010 at 8:03am - money - by Ecce (woman) - United Kingdom (London)
Today, I worked up the courage at lunch to sit next to the girl I've been in love with for 3 years. Everything was going great. That is, until I sneezed and my retainer shot out my mouth, and landed in her lap. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35410) - you deserved it (5476)
On 07/07/2010 at 9:17am - love - by braceface (man) - United Kingdom (Rhondda Cynon Taff)
Today, I fell asleep on the couch and must have rolled off. When I woke up, I noticed my braces were stuck to the rug. After frantically pulling, my mom finally sawed me off the rug with scissors. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25335) - you deserved it (2744)
On 07/03/2010 at 12:19am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, my siblings overpowered me and duct taped me to a chair. Helpless, I had to wait until my dad got home so he could help me. Instead, the first thing he did was reach for his camera to take a picture. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25304) - you deserved it (5585)
On 06/12/2010 at 2:55pm - kids - by kingwalrus - United Kingdom (Warwickshire)
Today, I found out my boyfriend keeps a gun under his pillow. This was only after my friends and I surprised him with his birthday cake while he was sleeping. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22605) - you deserved it (4547)
On 06/03/2010 at 8:23am - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom
Today, after staying at my boyfriend's house for the first time, I got in the shower. His bathroom door doesn't lock, so half way through my shower he walked in. Trying to be sexy, I pressed myself up against the glass, which turned out the be a door that opens outwards. I fell on the floor. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15229) - you deserved it (26688)
On 06/03/2010 at 4:54am - intimacy - by elevenharries (woman) - United Kingdom
Today, my boyfriend came home while I was making a snack in the kitchen. We started making out and he lifted me up and sat my ass on the hot stove. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28164) - you deserved it (5466)
On 05/30/2010 at 8:27pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Louisiana)
Today, the girl that I fancy was sick and I offered to hug her, but she protested saying that she didn't want to get me sick. I told her, "If hugging you gets me sick, then I'll just have to deal with being sick." She gave me the biggest hug she could. I haven't stopped puking since. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9093) - you deserved it (36986)
On 05/28/2010 at 12:15am - love - by TheSickness (man) - United States (Connecticut)
Today, my girlfriend left me for my best friend. Over a text message with "lol" in it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33734) - you deserved it (2474)
On 05/15/2010 at 1:07pm - love - by schwange (man) - United States (New York)
Today, I fell in a river with a £700 camera, a £200 lens, and an iPhone while trying to rescue a 50 pence ball for my dog. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11106) - you deserved it (18962)
On 03/14/2010 at 9:36am - money - by Rick (man) - United Kingdom (Manchester)
Today, I was sitting on the toilet when I felt something brush my shoulder. I turned around in fright, and one of my bum cheeks slipped off the seat and into the toilet, making me fall sideways and hit my face on the toilet roll holder. I now have a black eye. It was my hair on my shoulder. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7686) - you deserved it (12798)
On 03/14/2010 at 6:50am - misc - by Hatty (woman) - United Kingdom
Today, I learnt that the people I work with dislike me so much that they have a competition to see who can accidentally hurt me the most. How did I find out? A chef poured boiling water over my hands, and another shouted "50 POINTS!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (25612) - you deserved it (4280)
On 03/14/2010 at 5:09am - misc - by Cooky (man) - United Kingdom (Calderdale)
Today, I was at my boyfriend's house, when I needed the loo. The door was ajar, so I walked into his bathroom, sat down, and started to pee. I then looked up to see the shocked face of his dad sitting naked in the bath. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18628) - you deserved it (6269)
On 03/13/2010 at 4:17am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Havering)
Today, my wife of four years confessed to me that she only married me for the money. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22270) - you deserved it (2173)
On 03/05/2010 at 8:05pm - money - by mrrichkid - United States (Illinois)
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