Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

1337_RoXxXor

Search for a member

1337_RoXxXor
  • Town/Country : Hannover, Germany
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 25 May 1993 (20 years)
  • Number of visits : 1234
  • Number of comments : 14
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

1337_RoXxXor's last visitors

ThursdayxoMeganAnnEvansFreezemarinaimlionqueen1400omgtinaadirtynsweetkaro_mit_kjoeinthedarkBarrientos432chrissybabe

1337_RoXxXor's FML badges

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

See all of 1337_RoXxXor's badges

1337_RoXxXor's favorite FMLs

Today, I yet again had to explain to my boyfriend how sleeping with another person is cheating. It's been three days, and almost as many fights. He still doesn't get it. FML

#14971443
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26814) - you deserved it (14264)

On 02/14/2011 at 8:45am - intimacy - by anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I dreamed I was getting married. I was wearing a white dress, had incredible cleavage and perfectly done makeup. Just one problem. I'm a guy. FML

#14968643
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44124) - you deserved it (8911)

On 02/14/2011 at 1:24am - misc - by bride (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I found out that it is never, ever a good idea to put a band-aid of any kind on your penis, because eventually you will have to take it off. FML

#14967873
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7417) - you deserved it (44640)

On 02/14/2011 at 12:31am - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I got a parking ticket in the mail. I don't have a car. FML

#14967692
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29179) - you deserved it (2228)

On 02/14/2011 at 12:20am - misc - by Roxas (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, to prevent a fistfight at work, I had to mediate a contested debate between two coworkers on what was evidently a very touchy subject: Which is better, the orange creamsicle or the ice cream sandwich? I was the only one to get in trouble for wasting company time. FML

#14917539
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19618) - you deserved it (3718)

On 02/10/2011 at 12:31am - work - by geoduck - United States

Today, I decided to surprise my boyfriend by creating an account on Runescape; his favorite game. After finding him in-game, I started talking to him, not revealing who I was. After a while, I asked him if he had a girlfriend. He promptly said no and asked me for nude pics. FML

#14909703
336 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49082) - you deserved it (13036)

On 02/09/2011 at 2:22pm - love - by Samyett (woman) - United States

Today, I wanted to propose to my girlfriend, so I bought M and M's which I had customized with the words "Will you marry me?" on them. She ate them all without reading them. FML

#14895043
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37609) - you deserved it (12385)

On 02/08/2011 at 11:57am - love - by Username - United States (Nevada)

Today, it looks like I may have an STD. My fiancé and his friends went to Vegas two months ago. He says he's been completely faithful. They say what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas. Turns out that's not quite true. FML

#14882919
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40227) - you deserved it (4037)

On 02/07/2011 at 2:51pm - intimacy - by anonomous - United States (Florida)

Today, my boyfriend asked me to play dead so he could have sex with my "corpse." FML

#14881975
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49295) - you deserved it (6884)

On 02/07/2011 at 12:44pm - intimacy - by Anon. (woman) - United Kingdom (Bradford)

Today, I found out that FedEx delivered my $700 package to the wrong person. The person who signed for it didn't even spell my name right. FML

#14877775
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27136) - you deserved it (2014)

On 02/07/2011 at 1:52am - money - by bob - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I had the sudden urge to sneeze as I was wiping my ass. Out of instinct, I used my hand to cover my mouth. I never let go of the toilet paper. FML

#7217520
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23930) - you deserved it (30642)

On 01/08/2010 at 1:48pm - misc - by Hugh_Jankles (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I had to take a dump. While looking for a book to read, I sneezed. The force of the sneeze caused me to shit my pants. The glob of dung then ran down my leg before falling out of my shorts onto my carpet, all in less than 5 seconds. Nothing in my life has prepared me for this. FML

#5828114
223 comments

I agree, your life sucks (84225) - you deserved it (13912)

On 10/14/2009 at 1:01pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I saw a girl I haven't seen in 4 years. She used to like me back then. Since then I have lost 50 pounds, and never had the confidence to ask her out. She said I looked really sexy so I decided to ask her out on a date then and there. She said no, she only likes fat guys. FML

#5072938
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44404) - you deserved it (4005)

On 09/06/2009 at 12:19am - love - by Nofatforme (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I needed new business cards so I went to design and print some. After I designed, I was happy with them and printed off 100 copies. I live at a place called Canal Rocks. I forgot the 'C'. I now have 76 business cards which say 'anal rocks.' I already distributed 24. FML

#4678208
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12837) - you deserved it (33175)

On 08/20/2009 at 9:23am - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I took a cute girl out to an arcade date, and mercilessly dominated her in every game there to the point she refused to talk to me afterwards. Gamer Pride:1 - Getting Laid:0. FML

#4673205
291 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7241) - you deserved it (73130)

On 08/20/2009 at 1:45am - love - by razgriz1 (man) - United States (Washington)



FML's blog

  • Zoé's Illustrated FML
  • Hey there, young whippersnappers. Yes, you, the youth. I’m talking to you, sitting at home, scratching your asses. Why aren’t you doing something more constructive with your lives? Stop watching that shit…

Friday 18 April 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: