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007type

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007type
  • Town/Country : Pakistan
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Saturday 25 March 1989 (25 years)
  • Number of visits : 3621
  • Number of comments : 136
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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007type's FML badges

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

I never take things to heart

Having said that, my 3 comments on that FML were really worth it.

A new Thumb

You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.

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007type's favorite FMLs

Today, I saw a folder on my son's PC named "PussyPictures". I sat him down for a talk, only to be told they contained pictures of the James Bond character Pussy Galore, for his essay about sexism in movies. He's now mocking me for "having a dirty mind". FML

#20135671
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8117) - you deserved it (30327)

On 10/27/2012 at 3:28pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Germany (Bayern)

Today, I decided to watch some porn to cheer myself up after having recently been dumped. Halfway through wanking the gibbon, I got a horrifyingly painful cramp in my foot, and cried out in pain. Ten seconds later, with my pants still down, my dad rushed in to see if I was okay. FML

#20135660
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16443) - you deserved it (9690)

On 10/27/2012 at 3:18pm - intimacy - by whoreticulturalist (man) - United Kingdom (Plymouth)

Today, my mom called me from jail. She was arrested for having sex in public. I was with my dad when I got the call. FML

#20135378
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46817) - you deserved it (2406)

On 10/27/2012 at 11:02am - intimacy - by Monkey (man) - United States

Today, I was writing out palm cards and didn't know if I'd spelled a word correctly, so I stared at it for about 10 seconds waiting for spell check to tell me if it was right or not before I realised I was writing on paper. FML

#20135256
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5239) - you deserved it (26495)

On 10/27/2012 at 8:43am - misc - by katier8295 (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I found out that my daughter has a hit list. There are over thirty names on there. My name is on it as well. FML

#20135128
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18838) - you deserved it (3008)

On 10/27/2012 at 3:20am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, it's the five year anniversary of the day I broke up with my girlfriend to see other people. I've not had sex a single time since. FML

#20134961
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8098) - you deserved it (40311)

On 10/27/2012 at 12:04am - intimacy - by Cslouth - United States (New York)

Today, during dinner, my daughter rudely cut into my conversation and gushed that she's "like, totally" going to audition for a reality TV show next year, after I pay her way. Five minutes into her jaw-dropping stupidity, I had to physically restrain myself from slapping her out of her chair. FML

#20134692
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20937) - you deserved it (5434)

On 10/26/2012 at 8:33pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Solihull)

Today, I was watching a movie with my boyfriend, when things got a little frisky and we started making out. It was my first time French-kissing, and apparently he has a very sensitive gag reflex, because the moment my tongue went in, he started retching, and vomited moments later. FML

#20134512
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18070) - you deserved it (2215)

On 10/26/2012 at 5:59pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Switzerland (Zurich)

Today, my grandma took it upon herself to give me the sex talk. After explaining the mechanics in excessive detail, she said I shouldn't be afraid to sleep around. Apparently, I need to be comfortable with the man who'll be "conning me into blowing him for the next 50 years." FML

#20134273
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23441) - you deserved it (2278)

On 10/26/2012 at 1:58pm - intimacy - by fiftyshardsofbroccoli (woman) - United States

Today, I went out of my way to avoid street preachers thrusting hateful propaganda at me. A young woman ran up to me and started waving paper in my face, and I snapped at her to fuck off. Right afterwards I realised she was returning something that fell out of my pocket. She looked terrified. FML

#20133994
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6596) - you deserved it (28134)

On 10/26/2012 at 8:24am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (South Australia)

Today, I found a notebook my 12-year-old sister had been doodling in. Turns out the "doodles" were poems full of obscenities and descriptions of how she wanted to hurt herself. When I showed it to my mom, she accused me of writing the notebook myself to frame my sister. FML

#20133698
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22103) - you deserved it (1746)

On 10/26/2012 at 12:38am - kids - by familyofpsychos - United States (Nebraska)

Today, 60 guests for my wedding were supposed to arrive to the Bahamas. The first and only hurricane of the season decided to crash my wedding, stranding my mom, maid of honor and best man. No one will be able to attend my wedding, except the other drunken hotel guests. FML

#20133630
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18869) - you deserved it (2945)

On 10/25/2012 at 11:58pm - misc - by sadbride - Bahamas (New Providence)

Today, after therapy for obsessing over every woman who talks to me, all I could think about was how I could seduce my therapist. I think I still need a lot of help. FML

#20133155
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18816) - you deserved it (4875)

On 10/25/2012 at 7:09pm - love - by mental - United States

Today, trying to be nice, I asked my little sister how school was. She burst into a temper tantrum and screamed at me to fuck off. She's eight. FML

#20132869
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19788) - you deserved it (1890)

On 10/25/2012 at 3:43pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my boyfriend found a take-out menu under my bed. It's probably been there for months. He looked at it and said, "Well, that explains a lot." FML

#20132432
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14931) - you deserved it (3664)

On 10/25/2012 at 5:58am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - South Africa (Western Cape)



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