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007type's FML badges
An insomniac or a creature of the dark
You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.
I never take things to heart
Having said that, my 3 comments on that FML were really worth it.
A new Thumb
You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.
007type's favorite FMLs
Today, I was trolling in a chat room when someone said, quote: "He's just a no-life, unemployed loser still living in his mom's basement. Probably spends all day stroking his tiny dong and fantasizing about having a real girlfriend." I actually started crying because it was so accurate. FML
by pathetic / 04/23/2012 at 6:06pm / Poland (Mazowieckie) / Geek
by hoggypig / 04/23/2012 at 9:00am / Miscellaneous
Today, after several years of having her help me out by doing household chores, I bought my fifteen-year-old daughter a new pair of jeans. Her reaction was to squeal, "Master has presented Dobby with clothes. Dobby is free!" FML
by Anonymous / 04/13/2012 at 10:06pm / France / Miscellaneous
by azmom / 03/27/2012 at 1:51pm / United States (Arizona) / Kids
Today, I called my wife from work to check in on her because she's eight months pregnant. She didn't answer. Instead she showed up at my work hysterically crying and screaming, "You don't love me because I'm a fat whale!" She then knocked everything off my desk. FML
by Tristan Brantley / 03/11/2012 at 3:36am / United States (California) / Love
Today, I was in class and felt something tugging on my hair. I thought it was caught on the chair, so I turned around a little to look. The guy behind me was holding my hair and smelling it. He gave me a creepy smile, winked, and continued. FML
by littlekellilee / 03/08/2012 at 11:23am / Canada (Alberta) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 02/23/2012 at 8:49am / United States / Work
by Arniii / 02/01/2012 at 1:53pm / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, I found out that Google+ has been automatically uploading my cell phone pictures as I take them. My friends have now seen pictures of me, my penis, and other things too horrifying to talk about. FML
by brannie / 01/29/2012 at 7:26pm / United States / Miscellaneous
by Needsanewjob / 01/10/2012 at 10:34am / United States (Arizona) / Work
by Scarred4Life / 01/01/2012 at 1:18am / United States (Maryland) / Miscellaneous
by ikungfuyou / 12/27/2011 at 2:11am / United States / Intimacy
Today, my husband called me to the bedroom to show me something. This "something" was him demonstrating his seemingly well-trained ability to accurately type out a sentence on my phone using nothing but his erect penis. FML
by anne / 12/16/2011 at 10:46pm / United States (Texas) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 12/16/2011 at 12:30am / United States (Missouri) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 11/12/2011 at 12:34am / United States (California) / Intimacy
- 1Today, I took a test. I got up to turn it in, and accidentally bumped into another student. We both… 2Today, my energetic 10-month-old decided to stay up four hours past bedtime. After I FINALLY got… 3Today, I tried to fire the worst worker I've ever had over the phone because he never shows up for…