Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Today, once again I tried to convince my dad to stop smoking. And once again, while I was speaking, he lit up a cigarette and smoked until my asthma flared up and I was wheezing so hard that I had to leave the room. FML

#21356583
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32544) - you deserved it (3313)

On 02/15/2015 at 9:52am - love - by =( (woman) - Australia

Today, my girlfriend berated me for my "lack of communication skills", all while deeply engrossed with something on her phone. FML

#21356030
30 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26618) - you deserved it (2371)

On 02/14/2015 at 3:04pm - love - by hopeless - Canada (Nova Scotia)

Today, while at the office, a surprise Valentine's gift arrived for me, the first I've ever received. It was a box of heart-shaped cookies. From my mother. I'm 39. FML

#21355623
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27307) - you deserved it (3101)

On 02/13/2015 at 10:49pm - love - by FMAhole - Australia (Queensland)

Today, after a week of not seeing each other, my boyfriend asked if he could come over and hang out. He only came because he ran out of food at his house. FML

#21355470
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29006) - you deserved it (2965)

On 02/13/2015 at 5:49pm - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I spent an ungodly amount of money to send my long-distance boyfriend a giant bouquet of roses for Valentine's Day. A few hours after making the non-refundable payment, he let me know we weren't going to work out, and that he was already sleeping with someone else. FML

#21355292
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31640) - you deserved it (3748)

On 02/13/2015 at 11:13am - love - by cyprianista - United States (Texas)

Today, I found out that honestly answering "yes" to "Are Kate Upton's boobs bigger than mine?" is in my girlfriend's mind the equivalent of saying I don't find her attractive anymore and that I want to break up with her to date a supermodel. FML

#21355268
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27750) - you deserved it (7083)

On 02/13/2015 at 9:54am - love - by StrawHatBill (man) - United States

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me after I beat her once again in a trivia game. She said that I was cheating, and if I was cheating on the game, I was definitely cheating on her as well. FML

#21354669
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32271) - you deserved it (2841)

On 02/12/2015 at 11:25am - love - by Vampire Teabag - United States (Texas)

Today, my husband recited to me the name and model number of every single weapon in the game Doom, along with what they did and roughly where to find them. Last month, he forgot my birthday. We've been married for 6 years; he hasn't played Doom in at least 10. FML

#21353586
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31858) - you deserved it (3257)

On 02/10/2015 at 7:00pm - love - by doomed (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, a cute girl was telling me about her weird fetishes. I jokingly said, "Remind me never to have sex with you". She replied, "Don't worry, I have standards". FML

#21353290
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28526) - you deserved it (17784)

On 02/10/2015 at 9:51am - love - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Cambridgeshire)

Today, my girlfriend was feeling a little down, so I tried to console her. She said she just needed space and I respected that. Then an hour later she was fine, so I asked how she did it. She replied that she talked to her ex for a whole hour. This is a common procedure. FML

#21353256
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35978) - you deserved it (4354)

On 02/10/2015 at 7:59am - love - by krh14 - United States (Maryland)

Today, my date bumped into her ex-husband, who decided to join us for the rest of the dinner. FML

#21352274
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33046) - you deserved it (2377)

On 02/08/2015 at 7:19pm - love - by jimmy_poison - New Zealand (Waikato)

Today, it was my birthday. My boyfriend made me breakfast in bed, then we went out shopping, had a picnic, watched a good romcom, had a fancy dinner, and ended the day with great sex. And when the clock struck twelve, he dumped me. FML

#21351571
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43194) - you deserved it (2747)

On 02/07/2015 at 4:03pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (New Jersey)



Sophie Marie's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Sophie Marie's illustrated FML
  • Hi there Friday, great to see you again! What are we going to talk about this week? It's the same question that most people ask themselves while strolling into their usual bar on a Friday night, on their way to…

Friday 27 March 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: