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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, my girlfriend missed our date, so I text her angry, telling her if she can't make our dates then we should break up, and generally telling her off. 5 Minutes later I get a picture message of her sleeping in a hospital bed from her mother saying "Shut the **** up, she had appendicitis." FML

#3361176
316 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15691) - you deserved it (87709)

On 06/30/2009 at 7:20am - love - by annoyedguy (man) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I went to my friend's beautiful wedding. The only other single girl there was 5 years old. She caught the bouquet. FML

#3335931
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45567) - you deserved it (4410)

On 06/29/2009 at 2:14pm - love - by StillSingle (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I planned a romantic dinner with rose petals, the whole lot, for my ex-girlfriend to win her back. When I took her to my house I told her to guess what I had planned, to which she replied "I hope it's not a stupid romantic dinner with rose petals and shit." FML

#3331987
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50628) - you deserved it (13093)

On 06/29/2009 at 2:31am - love - by ipopnlok (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I finally cracked the password on my husband's email account. I don't know which is worse: finding out your husband is cheating on you with several people, or finding his password includes his ex-girlfriend's name. FML

#3305940
264 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58822) - you deserved it (22817)

On 06/28/2009 at 1:42pm - love - by resipsahipsta (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my husband of one week lost his wedding ring while we were preparing for a dinner party. After a thorough search and no luck, I started to cry. He told me to quit being a drama queen because we had guests. He then got drunk with his friends, puked on the patio, and called me a bitch. FML

#3302953
257 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67347) - you deserved it (10328)

On 06/28/2009 at 12:05pm - love - by honeymoonisover (woman) - United States (Arkansas)

Today, I went on a blind date a girl from work had set me up with. Apparently my co-worker thinks I'm gay. FML

#3292838
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45293) - you deserved it (4033)

On 06/28/2009 at 12:51am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I got my hair done, eyebrows waxed, and a new expensive dress to impress my boyfriend. When I got home I asked him if he noticed anything different about me. He looked at me for one minute before asking, "Did you finally start using Proactive?" FML

#3285279
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42984) - you deserved it (5319)

On 06/27/2009 at 8:55pm - love - by Acneface - Sent from mobile version

Today, it's been a few days since I decided to give this girl I like the silent treatment.I've been writing on/off with her for a few weeks, but decided to stop a bit, to seem mysterious. When I logged on Facebook today, her status was "..is so happy that annoying guy has stopped writing to me!" FML

#3279854
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18337) - you deserved it (59159)

On 06/27/2009 at 5:11pm - love - by jake (man) - Denmark (Frederiksborg)

Today, I was making out with my boyfriend. I opened my eyes to see his eyes fixed on something else. I turned my head to see what was so interesting. He was on his iPhone looking up recipes for things to wrap in bacon. FML

#3271801
234 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56309) - you deserved it (6949)

On 06/27/2009 at 10:29am - love - by a_B_c_D_e_F_g (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I finally thought that my mother was okay with me being a lesbian. Then, over dinner, she turns to me and says "So, do you still think you like girls, or are you going to start being normal again?" FML

#3237223
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52264) - you deserved it (10041)

On 06/26/2009 at 10:22am - love - by shouldhaveknown (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I broke up with my girlfriend. Driving her home, we got stuck in a construction zone. I waited half an hour with with my ex-girlfriend bawling her eyes out in the passenger seat as I watched the traffic lady eat her lunch. FML

#3228373
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16253) - you deserved it (60143)

On 06/26/2009 at 1:31am - love - by f03_f0r_l1f3 (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I rushed home to tell my parents my girlfriend had accepted my proposal. They asked how I could be so selfish at a time like this. Apparently, Michael Jackson's death is more important than their son. FML

#3215431
270 comments

I agree, your life sucks (75960) - you deserved it (6523)

On 06/25/2009 at 8:56pm - love - by Tom (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I brought a friend who I have loved for years out to a nice restaurant for dinner. I ordered an expensive bottle of wine, and poured each of us a glass. As I was about to tell her I loved her, she raised her glass for a toast and said "A toast to friendship!" FML

#3207933
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53491) - you deserved it (7155)

On 06/25/2009 at 6:24pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Massachusetts)



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