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Today, I went with my girlfriend to her ex-boyfriend's house party. She got incredibly drunk and I spent the whole night looking after her when she was throwing up. In the brief moment before she passed out she said "thanks Matt, you're a great boyfriend." Matt is her ex. FML

#4600663
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44697) - you deserved it (5412)

On 08/17/2009 at 1:43pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Birmingham)

Today, I tried to propose to my girlfriend of 5 years. I love her so much and I've been treating her extremely well. Before I could pop the question, she said in these exact words: "Babe, our relationship is like a drunken night. Fun while it lasted but its something I'd rather forget." FML

#4595974
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56501) - you deserved it (3058)

On 08/17/2009 at 8:04am - love - by singleandheartbroken (man) - Australia (Victoria)

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my boyfriend was fired. After breaking the news, he also broke up with me. Apparently, his boss had a creepy crush on me and would give my boyfriend bonuses for bringing me to company events and, occasionally, out on the boss's personal boat. Looks like I am no longer useful. FML

#4591074
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47536) - you deserved it (2718)

On 08/17/2009 at 1:43am - love - by TrophyGirlfriend (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my girlfriend named my penis "little baby carrot." FML

#4572721
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56903) - you deserved it (9870)

On 08/16/2009 at 1:14pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Kansas)

Today, I finished writing the most perfect love letter for this girl at summer school. At the end of the letter I signed: Your secret admirer. Cute, right? Not really. Turns out I was so anxious to finish the letter that I ended up writing my name at the bottom. FML

#4563913
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10535) - you deserved it (48417)

On 08/16/2009 at 1:17am - love - by footyfallout (man) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I was planning on asking out a girl I've been really close to for a few months now. I was with her when I got a forward text from my friend. It was from the girl and it said "noooo tell him not to ask me out I don't like him." I got rejected via forward text before I told her how I felt. FML

#4562834
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35725) - you deserved it (2678)

On 08/16/2009 at 12:33am - love - by Tgreject (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, on my wedding day, when they said "you may kiss the bride", I swung my wife over in the romantic fashion and went in for the kiss. Unfortunately my hands were sweaty as I was nervous and she slipped under my grip. She fell and was knocked unconscious in front of hundreds of people. FML

#4543711
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46717) - you deserved it (17552)

On 08/15/2009 at 3:50am - love - by slipperyhands (man) - United States (California)

Today, my 250 pound boyfriend was on top of me while we were making out. I actually passed out in the middle of it from not being able to breathe. FML

#4541941
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47245) - you deserved it (20817)

On 08/15/2009 at 2:13am - love - by Squashed (woman) - United States

Today, I got dumped by my girlfriend of 4 years because I didn't know the exact amount of days that we'd been together. FML

#4541155
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57912) - you deserved it (6326)

On 08/15/2009 at 1:30am - love - by fmexgirlfriend (man) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, I met my girlfriend's extended family for the first time. Her family kept telling her how much I looked and acted like her older brother and I'm guessing by the end of the day she agreed because now she pulls away and gags when I try to kiss her. FML

#4534707
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46664) - you deserved it (2309)

On 08/14/2009 at 9:14pm - love - by BFfail (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, after dating my girlfriend for about a month she decided to change her Facebook status to taken. When I saw the update I immediately clicked "Like." Then I looked up and saw I wasn't the person she had put herself in the relationship with. FML

#4533889
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46843) - you deserved it (4948)

On 08/14/2009 at 8:39pm - love - by waitthatsnotme (man) - United States (California)

Today, I fractured my knuckle at the gym. My girlfriend offered to drive me to Urgent Care. As I threw my gym bag in the car, my keys flew out of the bag's pocket and hit her in the face. I spent the whole afternoon getting dirty looks from nurses because of my broken hand and her black eye. FML

#4523157
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57729) - you deserved it (4809)

On 08/14/2009 at 10:26am - love - by Anon (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me in the parking lot right before a baseball game, then convinced me to still go to the game in tears. After the game, we were walking back to the car and he goes, "so, how about some break up lovin'?" FML

#4516165
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57970) - you deserved it (8447)

On 08/14/2009 at 12:35am - love - by ish (woman) - United States (Maryland)



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