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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, my boyfriend bought me a beautiful pair of very expensive diamond earrings, along with a card that read, "To my beautiful brown eyed Princess." My ears aren't pierced, and my eyes are green. FML

#5733211
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39572) - you deserved it (3551)

On 10/09/2009 at 12:22am - love - by rhythmbandit (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I had my final divorce proceeding. The judge denied my divorce because my husband is unemployed. I can't get a divorce until he gets a job to pay child support. He hasn't had a job for 3 years. FML

#5730888
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38613) - you deserved it (3349)

On 10/08/2009 at 10:26pm - love - by branwen5 - United States

Today, my boyfriend asked me out to dinner, which we never do. While at the restaurant he gets down on his knees, looks me in the eyes, and pulls out a little box. He opens it and inside is a note that says 'We're Done.' He then leaves me at the restaurant with the bill and the $2.00 box. FML

#5721676
233 comments

I agree, your life sucks (74979) - you deserved it (5499)

On 10/08/2009 at 3:04pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, while working on my girlfriend of three years' computer I found a file called 'My future wedding'. I assumed it was very old and decided to look through it. Of the list of 5 potential grooms I was not one of them. This didn't bother me until I saw that it had last been edited two days ago. FML

#5721325
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38037) - you deserved it (3930)

On 10/08/2009 at 1:31pm - love - by Rage (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, completely excited, I told my mom about this guy from high school, that I had really liked and who had found me on Facebook. He said he regretted not asking me out in high school and offered to fly me out to visit him. Her response? "Has he seen what you look like now?" FML

#5706276
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37104) - you deserved it (3871)

On 10/07/2009 at 5:16pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I saw photos of my boyfriend at his 25th birthday party. The one he told me was cancelled. FML

#5659886
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41426) - you deserved it (3029)

On 10/05/2009 at 9:55am - love - by Konstantine (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, I went to a store to buy a man's thong because my girlfriend wanted me to. When I went in I also grabbed some lingerie for her. Thinking I was being clever I wrapped it up in a t-shirt so no one would notice and went to checkout. The cashier then called for a price check on the thong. FML

#5651689
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10331) - you deserved it (30147)

On 10/04/2009 at 10:01pm - love - by danskinnow (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, my boyfriend's head was on my lap. I bent down to kiss him. My stomach rolls got there first. FML

#5645915
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19406) - you deserved it (44732)

On 10/04/2009 at 5:40pm - love - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boyfriend called and said he was stopping by to talk. I didn't understand why he would stop by, so I asked if he was going to break up with me, he said no. Half an hour later, he knocked on my door to break up with me. FML

#5635869
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35470) - you deserved it (5187)

On 10/04/2009 at 2:13am - love - by helplesslover (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was dining out with some friends when a hot guy on the table next to us smiled at me. Flattered, I smiled back at him several times. On his way out, he laid a napkin with his number at my table. I didn't notice, too busy looking at the yellow dress and the pink pumps he was wearing. FML

Today, I was on a date with a guy having a great time. I went up to go to the ladies' room, but as I walked back to the table, I heard some giggles. I looked and found out why. My skirt was tucked into my underwear. I was wearing my lucky Star Wars-themed panties. FML

#5622961
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32122) - you deserved it (13733)

On 10/03/2009 at 2:41pm - love - by diva467 (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I broke up with my boyfriend. I found out he was seeing someone behind my back: my ex-boyfriend. FML

#5618251
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49946) - you deserved it (4603)

On 10/03/2009 at 7:43am - love - by Anon (woman) - Australia (Australian Capital Territory)



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