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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Man or woman?

Today, there was a knock at my door, and I was greeted by a punch to the face. The man was the extremely angry "fiancé" of the girl I've been married to for just over a year. FML

#5287091
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51020) - you deserved it (2541)

On 09/16/2009 at 2:34am - love - by OhDamn (man) - United Kingdom (Bristol)

Today, my boyfriend got pulled over and arrested for driving with a suspended license. Instead of getting my car impounded, his friend thought he'd do me a favor and drive it back to me. He doesn't know how to drive stick and blew my engine. My boyfriend is in jail and I no longer have a car. FML

#5286823
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36042) - you deserved it (5766)

On 09/16/2009 at 2:12am - love - by takingthebus (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was having an after work-out dinner with my ex-girlfriend and we were having a great time, catching up, eating good food, all the good things. Then when I got home, I realized I just talked to my ex-girlfriend for an hour and a half about how much better her new boyfriend is than me. FML

#5285675
26 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10187) - you deserved it (35015)

On 09/16/2009 at 12:24am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I decided to go through my husband's phone to make sure I invited everyone to the surprise party I was planning for him. There were a few I had missed so I called to let them know about it. The last number I called was his girlfriend. FML

#5276635
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48838) - you deserved it (4108)

On 09/15/2009 at 5:44pm - love - by Soontobeex (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I found out that the reason I hadn't gotten pregnant yet was because my husband had a vasectomy after the birth of his son. He even had the nerve to continously tell me, "it'll happen soon, baby" and let me believe we were trying. FML

#5273221
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52953) - you deserved it (3412)

On 09/15/2009 at 2:18pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, after thirteen years of engagement, my fiancé and I split. As is, with the day, we changed our facebook relationships to make it official. I logged back on tonight to find his mother, the woman I've spent the last year looking after and having a good time, 'liking' the break up. FML

#5269960
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36106) - you deserved it (6786)

On 09/15/2009 at 8:10am - love - by ohIlike (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, my best friend, the man who I've been in love with for nine years, finally told me he loves me and wants to spend the rest of his life with me. Unfortunately, it was while he was using me to practice proposing to his girlfriend. FML

#5269441
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49350) - you deserved it (7847)

On 09/15/2009 at 6:53am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was hanging out with a guy I liked. We sat in the gardens, me facing the path, him with his back to it. We were in deep conversation when I noticed a dog that looked exactly like mine. Then I looked up and saw a man that looked like my dad. Yes - my parents followed me on a date. FML

#5254705
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48336) - you deserved it (3181)

On 09/14/2009 at 5:30pm - love - by bumblebee (woman) - United Kingdom (Buckinghamshire)

Today, I found out that the money my husband said he loaned to his "mother" actually went to the purchase of new lingerie for the woman he's cheating on me with. I just got the bill from the department store. FML

#5252431
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41212) - you deserved it (2574)

On 09/14/2009 at 3:28pm - love - by thisistypical (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I had an art class with my girlfriend. The teacher assigned "anti-cards", or cards for unusual or bad occasions. My girlfriend decided to make a "break-up" card, and I helped her write the poem inside it. After class, she gave it to me. FML

#5251989
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40013) - you deserved it (5814)

On 09/14/2009 at 2:54pm - love - by UnluckyArtist (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, my boyfriend of 5 years broke up with me. Why? Our one month old's hair is growing in blonde, and we both have dark hair. Did I cheat? No. I had blonde hair as a child until I was 4... As did every one else born in my family. I guess this factor doesn't count when you're paranoid. FML

#5249359
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50141) - you deserved it (5048)

On 09/14/2009 at 10:13am - love - by babymomma (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my friend and I were at the mall and saw a "Grow Your Own Boyfriend" toy. I remarked that I already had one of those, and she freaked out, very loudly and openly, about me "finally having a boyfriend". I had to embarrassingly explain I meant I had the toy... not an actual boyfriend. FML

#5235407
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31161) - you deserved it (5628)

On 09/13/2009 at 7:10pm - love - by CaeliLady (woman) - United States (Kansas)



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