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Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. When I asked why, she replied with "You don't go out anymore. All you do is lay in bed." I've had the flu for the past week. FML

#6066680
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33395) - you deserved it (2119)

On 10/30/2009 at 2:25am - love - by ZPyRoGoDz (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I took this gorgeous girl from work to eat at Olive Garden. I was trying to be romantic and had the waiter bring two glasses of wine. I guess she doesn't really drink wine, she covered her fettucini Alfredo in vomit. After dinner, she thanked me with a french kiss. FML

#6066504
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30777) - you deserved it (7091)

On 10/30/2009 at 2:02am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I got a text from my boyfriend that said, "Last week was the most embarassing time of my life, we're over." He was of course referring to the seizure that I had due to my epilepsy at Olive Garden. FML

#6060291
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41894) - you deserved it (2420)

On 10/29/2009 at 7:44pm - love - by Allie (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, after feeling fat and ugly and a bit depressed, I logged on to Facebook to see my boyfriend had posted "I have the most beautiful girlfriend in the world!" I 'liked' it and commented "Aww thank you baby!" I logged in later to see that he commented back saying "I didn't mean you." FML

#6053348
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38402) - you deserved it (4631)

On 10/29/2009 at 10:27am - love - by deserved (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend of seven years dumped me because he said my cheeks getting way too fat for his taste and he didn't want to be with a chipmunk. FML

#6050345
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33800) - you deserved it (6957)

On 10/29/2009 at 1:20am - love - by chipmunk (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I went on a first date with an employee from Sobey's who asked for my number while I was grocery shopping. We decided to each bring a friend. I brought my roommate. He brought his girlfriend. FML

#6049494
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28675) - you deserved it (3432)

On 10/29/2009 at 12:11am - love - by lds124 (woman) - Canada (Saskatchewan)

Today, I confronted my boyfriend, suspecting that he has been cheating on me during the past few months. He vehemently denied it. Then told me it would never happen again. What? FML

#6049453
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36788) - you deserved it (2709)

On 10/29/2009 at 12:09am - love - by clueless (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, it was my wedding day. I gave a speech about the first time my wife and I met. I said I knew she was the perfect woman for me and it was love at first sight. I looked to my right as she stormed off and then realized I had told a story about my ex-girlfriend who was sitting in the crowd. FML

#6042161
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9011) - you deserved it (83005)

On 10/28/2009 at 5:22pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I learned that girls don't like it when you pass out from carrying them to the bed. What they DO like, is telling all their friends. FML

#6039295
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27862) - you deserved it (8298)

On 10/28/2009 at 1:07pm - love - by thatguy (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my girlfriend's best friend was dumped, and was absolutely depressed. My girlfriend thought she'd show her sympathy by breaking up with me so they "could be single together." FML

#6028042
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45943) - you deserved it (2347)

On 10/27/2009 at 7:13pm - love - by dumped (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my boyfriend was reaching over to give me a hug for no reason. I said "Aww, You're sweet! I love you too!" He looked confused and said, "That's great, but I was reaching for the remote." FML

#6026948
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26885) - you deserved it (5901)

On 10/27/2009 at 5:57pm - love - by Queen_of_Night (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I visited my boyfriend's house excited about the romantic night he promised me. As time passed, we started making out and heading up to his room. Rose petals and candles filled his room. "How romantic", I thought. That is, until we saw his 5 year old sister blowing up condom balloons. FML

#6020762
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30514) - you deserved it (4862)

On 10/27/2009 at 6:20am - love - by kahemae44 (woman) - United States (Texas)



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