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Today, I came back from my 3 month vacation from France. During my vacation I lost 32lbs and I was so excited to show off my new body to my boyfriend. When he walked in the door he didn't notice me, but he did notice my younger, thinner and tanner sister strutting around in her bikini. FML

#5064368
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39393) - you deserved it (3836)

On 09/05/2009 at 5:24pm - love - by nikkiquila_0699 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was going to ask this girl I love to homecoming. I set up a scavenger hunt, and my friend led her through it. At the end of the scavenger hunt I had a note that said, "Homecoming?" She said yes and hugged my friend. When I told her it was me who was asking, she laughed and said no. FML

#5058289
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37458) - you deserved it (7509)

On 09/05/2009 at 10:16am - love - by thisrllysucks (man) - United States (Kansas)

Today, I was talking to my boyfriend on the way to meet him. While chatting, I told him that I had a rip in my favorite jeans. When he sympathetically apologized, I said "It's okay, you're just going to take them off in a minute, anyway." I forgot my mom was in the car. FML

#5057922
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9231) - you deserved it (61770)

On 09/05/2009 at 9:39am - love - by leahbeuhh (woman) - United Kingdom (Cambridgeshire)

Today, someone asked my fiancée and I how we met. She said, "Well, it was just supposed to be a one night stand!" and laughed, right as I was about to take her hand and say, "It was love at first sight!" FML

#5054871
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33071) - you deserved it (3954)

On 09/05/2009 at 2:30am - love - by prin (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was on the phone with my boyfriend. We were messing around and I always jokingly say "You're adopted, nobody loves you" to everybody. His reply, "That's pretty fucked up, I am adopted." He really was. FML

#5052603
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7035) - you deserved it (53421)

On 09/05/2009 at 12:23am - love - by tryfailtryget11 (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I called my girlfriend's parent to ask for her hand in marriage. They were shocked and told me that they would have to refuse. Apparently my girlfriend had told them last week that she had met someone new at work and didn't know how to break it off with me. FML

Today, I skipped class to take the girl I like to the airport, and after giving her a goodbye hug I kissed her on the cheek. She laughed and said "Maybe we should discuss some boundaries when I get back." FML

#5030993
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36932) - you deserved it (6729)

On 09/03/2009 at 10:47pm - love - by strikeout (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my girlfriend called me and told me to come to her college, so I did. I was greeted by the campus police who told me to stop harassing her because she no longer wants to be with me. Then they told me I was no longer welcome on campus and hereby banned. She used campus police to dump me. FML

#5029285
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45324) - you deserved it (2607)

On 09/03/2009 at 9:45pm - love - by Wow (man) - United States

Today, I saw my boyfriend after not seeing him for 7 months. During this time I have lost a lot of weight and am proud of it. My boyfriend didn't say anything about the lost weight. When we were alone and things started to heat up, he took off my bra and said "I think your tits are smaller." FML

#5020137
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42729) - you deserved it (4215)

On 09/03/2009 at 1:38pm - love - by LosTits (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I had to sit for an hour listening to my girlfriend talk to her ex about his testicles. She laughed more during that conversation than she ever has with me. FML

#5015419
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35046) - you deserved it (5358)

On 09/03/2009 at 3:23am - love - by aftermath1991 (man) - United Kingdom (West Sussex)

Today, I wanted to make love with my boyfriend for the first time. I wanted everything to be perfect. The CD kept skipping, the rose petals had ants all over them, and he couldn't get it up. FML

#5011183
204 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47930) - you deserved it (12030)

On 09/02/2009 at 11:21pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was having lunch with my boyfriend and talking about how stressed out I've been because of my job. While I'm speaking, he pulls out his phone and says his boss is texting him and it was important. There was a game of Tetris reflecting onto his glasses from his phone. FML

#5000239
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40708) - you deserved it (6205)

On 09/02/2009 at 3:17pm - love - by littlemissignored (woman) - United States (New Jersey)



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