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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Man or woman?

Today, I was checking out a gorgeous woman in spandex with beautiful flowing long black hair on the treadmill at the gym. I spent a few minutes just watching her body move and ripple under the material. She turned off the treadmill and got off, only for me to find out that it was a guy. FML

#8512491
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11190) - you deserved it (41093)

On 02/21/2010 at 10:16am - love - by anonymous - United States

Today, I went skiing. Trying to show off to some inexperienced skiers, I flew past them at my top speed, a bracket snapped off my boot and I slid on my face for about 30 metres. FML

#8508631
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7538) - you deserved it (33699)

On 02/21/2010 at 5:01am - love - by hoser - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I travelled across an ocean to visit the guy I'm dating. He lied to me about his apartment; he lives in a dorm with a twin-sized bed and a bathroom he shares with 8 guys. Just now, after taking 3 trains from the airport to his "apt", he asked me to edit his essay while he goes to class. FML

#8493651
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24661) - you deserved it (7933)

On 02/20/2010 at 9:38pm - love - by gullible (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, at 1am, the girl of my dreams that I've been trying for over three years to date, finally asked me out via SMS. Too bad I was asleep at the time. She now thinks I've rejected her, and will no longer speak to me. FML

#8476151
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28291) - you deserved it (3395)

On 02/20/2010 at 11:22am - love - by Bilirubin (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, my boyfriend proposed. Three hours later, he called me to tell me he was kidding. FML

#8472964
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38275) - you deserved it (2192)

On 02/20/2010 at 8:59am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Georgia)

 Today, after flying halfway across the world to see the man I love, he admitted cheating on me several days before I arrived, not only with someone I know, but with someone I hate. FML

#8464823
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28422) - you deserved it (2330)

On 02/20/2010 at 12:30am - love - by izhamilton (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, my boyfriend called me over, all just to unclog his toilet. It was clogged because he put my phone in it while he was taking a dump to see if it would actually flush. FML

#8445631
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25378) - you deserved it (4725)

On 02/19/2010 at 3:18pm - love - by wtfuraretard (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, my mom came over to visit and permed my hair. Ten minutes after she started, I told her it was burning. She told me to suck it up because it doesn't hurt that badly. I now have scabs all over my scalp, hairline, and nape. FML

#8443272
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22670) - you deserved it (3301)

On 02/19/2010 at 1:24pm - love - by sexxibxmami - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I got a reply to my Valentine's Day card that I sent to my girlfriend. I'll get the address right next time because her neighbor is really creeping me out now. FML

#8435520
33 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8556) - you deserved it (19718)

On 02/19/2010 at 3:25am - love - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I went to a Jack's Mannequin concert. I'd asked this girl I'm interested in to come with me, and she insisted that she had to bring her two year old son with us. I'd told her it was no problem. Ten minutes into it, she said we needed to leave because it was too loud for him. FML

#8410012
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22879) - you deserved it (9321)

On 02/18/2010 at 3:12pm - love - by tyler - United States

Today, I woke up to hear my boyfriend drunkenly crashing around in the living room, after peeing in an ashtray because he thought it was a urinal. FML

#8409963
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20591) - you deserved it (3668)

On 02/18/2010 at 3:08pm - love - by gp28 - United States

Today, my parents decided they won't pay for college because of a Fox News story that said higher education "makes you liberal." FML

#8402650
382 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35338) - you deserved it (2696)

On 02/18/2010 at 8:20am - love - by merse - United States (North Carolina)

Today, after 25 years of marriage and 2 children, I was served with divorce papers. It turns out my 51 year old, soon to be ex, has been having an affair with the 24 year old tutor I hired to help our daughter bring her grades up. They are in love and want to start a new family together as soon as possible. FML

#8400921
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41598) - you deserved it (2546)

On 02/18/2010 at 4:51am - love - by brokenhearted (woman) - United States



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