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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Man or woman?

Today, my ex-boyfriend got high and decided to text all our friends and family the crazy stories about us. He was even nice enough to include pictures. I hear a nude one made it to my Dad. FML

#6961000
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26408) - you deserved it (12310)

On 12/26/2009 at 7:37pm - love - by blahppl14 (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, my boyfriend went to kiss me as we were walking home. It was very icy and he slipped. His teeth went through my lip. FML

#6958036
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35292) - you deserved it (2568)

On 12/26/2009 at 3:47pm - love - by Vicky - United Kingdom (Barnsley)

Today, my boyfriend went in to kiss me. He came in too aggressively and passionately and his front tooth knocked against mine. I am now missing a third of my right front tooth. Average cost for a dental crown? $900. FML

#6950494
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29139) - you deserved it (2677)

On 12/26/2009 at 1:10am - love - by Foam (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, from my girlfriend of five years, I got my clothes back, my engagment ring and a card that says, "Merry Christmas! It's me not you." FML

#6940899
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29989) - you deserved it (2200)

On 12/25/2009 at 3:27pm - love - by C45 (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my boyfriend gave me a box of chocolates for Christmas. I thought it was sweet until I noticed the heart drawn on the back. It's the same box of chocolates I gave him for Christmas. Christmas last year. FML

#6933650
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28495) - you deserved it (2719)

On 12/25/2009 at 2:04am - love - by HeSucks (woman) - United States (Mississippi)

Today, I sat for 3 hours at my boyfriend's Christmas celebrations. He has 22 cousins. They open presents one at a time. In silence. I got nothing. FML

#6933166
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29349) - you deserved it (2913)

On 12/25/2009 at 1:28am - love - by Earths_Venus (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I was going to propose to my girlfriend. I told her best friend the plan the day before. I got reservations to a restaurant on the beach, and we were going to arrive via boat. She never showed. Her parents called me asking why she left town to go to Paris. FML

#6926336
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31538) - you deserved it (2767)

On 12/24/2009 at 6:37pm - love - by hoplessG (man) - United States

Today, I saw the girl I had confessed my love to two years ago on the bus. We chatted for a few minutes and she got off on the first stop, saying that this is where she had to get off. Twenty minutes later, I see her in the bus next to mine. The bus number was 20. Like mine. FML

#6917396
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24182) - you deserved it (4882)

On 12/24/2009 at 4:35am - love - by busrides (man) - United States (California)

Today, I took a friend home from the hospital. She was on medication that made her drowsy. She fell onto her bed and asked me to help her take off some clothes since she had her winter gear on. She passes out and her roommate walks in and catches me undressing an unconscious girl. FML

#6914931
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33496) - you deserved it (2776)

On 12/24/2009 at 1:09am - love - by Nemesis2747 (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I learned that while anybody can call me a bitch, my husband got mad at his aunt for calling our dog a mutt. FML

#6914800
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24175) - you deserved it (3224)

On 12/24/2009 at 1:02am - love - by stupid_world (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was going on a date with my girlfriend. When I took her home, her sister came to the door. I used to date her sister and I didn't know they were related. My girlfriend realized this, then kicked me in the crotch. FML

#6879441
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26242) - you deserved it (10265)

On 12/22/2009 at 2:57am - love - by Dumped (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, my girlfriend canceled our date I've been looking forward to all week because her dog was having puppies. She doesn't have a dog. FML

#6877661
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29718) - you deserved it (2763)

On 12/22/2009 at 12:57am - love - by CRWMEN (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I asked my girlfriend what she thought of us getting married some day. She said she wasn't sure about me yet and that we may want to go in different directions soon. We've been dating for three years and I had the ring in my pocket at the moment. FML

#6873751
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37495) - you deserved it (3353)

On 12/21/2009 at 9:47pm - love - by chao (man) - United States (New Hampshire)



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