Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Today, I was standing at the top of the stairs petting my dog. The doorbell rang and my dog bolted down the stairs, tripping me. I fell down the whole flight of stairs backwards. Turns out the person at the door was my brother who had locked himself out. I almost died for no reason. FML

#8118993
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22158) - you deserved it (4471)

On 02/11/2010 at 1:14am - love - by sari14 - United States (Virginia)

Today, my girlfriend of a couple of months texted me that she was very sad because her puppy had just passed away. Feeling sorry for her, I bought her another puppy of the same breed. I wrapped it in a blanket and placed it on the passenger seat and went to pick her up from school. She sat on it. FML

#8099753
296 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32150) - you deserved it (7995)

On 02/10/2010 at 7:03pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was sitting on the train wondering what that putrid smell was. As I got off the train I realized there was vomit all over the back of my seat. FML

#8082566
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24709) - you deserved it (4029)

On 02/10/2010 at 6:47am - love - by kstaa - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I hung out with my boyfriend for the first time in two weeks. We were cuddling on the couch when he suddenly stands up. I thought he was going to hug me, but then he turned around, pinned my shoulders back so I couldn't move, and farted in my face. FML

#8079585
207 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33432) - you deserved it (5181)

On 02/10/2010 at 2:29am - love - by LoveStruck- - United States

Today, a white guy tried to teach me to use chopsticks properly. I'm Chinese and have been using them since I could eat. FML

#8074881
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31438) - you deserved it (4479)

On 02/10/2010 at 12:11am - love - by black_commet08 - Sent from mobile version

Today, I drove my ex-boyfriend home from dropping his car at the garage for new tires. On the way, I drove past my house where my boyfriend was sitting in the driveway ready to surprise me. My boyfriend watched us drive by. FML

#8067680
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9254) - you deserved it (37500)

On 02/09/2010 at 9:52pm - love - by caughttt (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I returned home to my girlfriend after being away for 6 weeks of work. I decided to take a shower and change before having a nice dinner with her. Without looking I grabbed a random pair of jeans from my closet to put on. They were Levis. I don't own or wear any Levis. FML

#8048706
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35382) - you deserved it (2670)

On 02/09/2010 at 10:43am - love - by safariboo - United States (Texas)

Today, my boyfriend confessed to me that the only reason he's with me is because I'm a good tattoo artist and he's too broke to pay for his own tattoos. We've been together for two years. FML

#8042728
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30172) - you deserved it (2630)

On 02/09/2010 at 3:14am - love - by estephi - Sent from mobile version

Today, my boyfriend told my hamster he loved her. Repeatedly. In 'cute' baby voices. He has yet to tell me. FML

#8039687
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22159) - you deserved it (5244)

On 02/09/2010 at 1:12am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Alabama)

Today, in art class, I tried to attract my crush's attention by slowly sitting down in front of him. Too bad I missed the chair and fell onto the floor. FML

#8038952
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8579) - you deserved it (30056)

On 02/09/2010 at 12:50am - love - by Unknown (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, my boyfriend of six months dumped me for his girlfriend on Grand Theft Auto because he was "tired of having to please two women at once." FML

#8026904
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30347) - you deserved it (3627)

On 02/08/2010 at 9:17pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I found out that the necklace my boyfriend gave me for my birthday was actually a gift he'd given to his ex girlfriend. FML

#8013959
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25859) - you deserved it (2599)

On 02/08/2010 at 3:24pm - love - by Chrissy (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me, saying I was immature for making gay jokes all the time. A few hours later, I got six texts and three calls from guys I didn't know. It turns out, she put my name and number on Craigslist as a gay man seeking a relationship. FML

#8013875
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11357) - you deserved it (49083)

On 02/08/2010 at 3:21pm - love - by christian9294 - United States (Ohio)



FML's blog

  • FML's Question Time #2 : School
  • We tried this before and it went pretty well, so here's another blog section for everyone to have give their opinion on a popular but controversial subject. OK, we're not debating a…

Thursday 23 April 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: