Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, I found out that my husband thinks its okay to have an online girlfriend and have naked pictures sent to his email because he's not "physically touching, making love, or kissing". The sad part is that the online girlfriend gets more action than me. FML

#6562992
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34561) - you deserved it (4377)

On 12/02/2009 at 12:57am - love - by j.b. - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I told my long distance girlfriend I will be coming half way across the country to visit here since I have not seen her in a month, I gave her my flight information so she could pick me up at the airport. She responded with "That's when The Office is on, can you take a cab?" FML

#6560085
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31648) - you deserved it (5178)

On 12/01/2009 at 10:18pm - love - by Bostonian (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I cleaned out my husband's drawer. He had kept every love letter I wrote him for the past 7 years. I smiled, struck by how romantic he was. My bliss was short-lived as I realized that he had also kept every single love letter his other lovers wrote him while we were married. FML

#6547469
87 comments

Today, I went on my first date in a long time. We went to see "New Moon." After the girl stole my hat, I grabbed her phone. While trying to get it back, she held a lighter to me, threatening me. Next thing I know my beard is on fire, so not only did I have to sit through horrible acting, I got burnt. FML

#6544765
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32067) - you deserved it (12010)

On 12/01/2009 at 12:00am - love - by toastedguy (man) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, my girlfriend decided we are ready for the next step in our relationship. Apparently that next step is her taking a dump with the door open. FML

#6540223
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34835) - you deserved it (4477)

On 11/30/2009 at 8:55pm - love - by Cpm (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I posted a picture of my boyfriend and I kissing on facebook. He untagged himself. FML

#6530048
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32388) - you deserved it (17751)

On 11/30/2009 at 7:17am - love - by destiny147 (woman) - United Kingdom (Worcestershire)

Today, I spoke with my boyfriend's crazy ex-girlfriend. Actually, she isn't all that crazy. He really did cheat on her with half a dozen other girls. The same girls he's apparently cheating on me with. How do I know for sure? Thank you crazy ex for his email passwords. FML

#6521538
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41543) - you deserved it (4534)

On 11/29/2009 at 9:06pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was lying in bed minding my own business when my mom entered the room. I was proposed to a few weeks ago by my boyfriend, and my mom came in to tell me that my boyfriend's mom was on the phone. Turns out, he stole the engagement ring from her drawer. FML

#6517359
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33933) - you deserved it (2832)

On 11/29/2009 at 5:52pm - love - by violet (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, Me and my girlfriend went and saw "The Blind Side." I sobbed throughout the entire movie. My girlfriend didn't shed a tear. FML

#6509087
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25397) - you deserved it (14386)

On 11/29/2009 at 4:33am - love - by jimmyt420 (man) - United States (California)

Today, it was my birthday. My boyfriend was kind enough to give me prescription strength deodorant. FML

#6505473
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27800) - you deserved it (6976)

On 11/29/2009 at 12:16am - love - by random123 - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I felt fairly depressed about being single for the holidays during work. This cute girl came to my register asking about our sales ad. After telling her we had no copies, she asked for my number. I shouted: "Finally, someone wants to go out with me." She wanted the store's number to call. FML

#6497714
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10535) - you deserved it (43406)

On 11/28/2009 at 5:23pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I woke up and looked in the mirror and noticed that my face was covered in glitter. I asked my wife about it and she said she put it on me while I was sleeping so that I would sparkle like Edward from Twilight when I'm in the sunlight. FML

#6494130
299 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59742) - you deserved it (6384)

On 11/28/2009 at 12:32pm - love - by IB6UB9 - United States

Today, I realized that I am dating a 25 year old man-child. He turns 13 whenever he sees my boobs, complete with big eyes and saying "honk honk" whenever he touches them. FML

#6493322
313 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33428) - you deserved it (9655)

On 11/28/2009 at 11:17am - love - by moon_paw (woman) - United States (South Carolina)



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