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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Man or woman?

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. This was after I saved several paychecks to afford to give her a weekend away for her birthday. Why did she end things so quick? Because apparently I'm balding faster than her Dad. I'm 20. FML

#7806645
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26963) - you deserved it (2192)

On 02/02/2010 at 2:34am - love - by BaldingQuick (man) - United States (Nebraska)

Today, I found out that my boyfriend asked me to marry him because he could get a tax cut from buying the ring. All of this happened in front of his mother. FML

#7804669
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21512) - you deserved it (2037)

On 02/02/2010 at 1:20am - love - by engagedmaybe (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, at four in the morning, I was asleep with my boyfriend beside me. I started yelling at him in my sleep and broke up with him. When I woke up, he was gone. FML

#7782568
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35209) - you deserved it (9215)

On 02/01/2010 at 3:56pm - love - by kaitlynn - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was in an elevator, and the hot girl who lives in my building and who I have a crush on got in. She was in a wheelchair with a broken leg, I panicked and tried to flirt with her, and I said 'Nice chair.' She replied 'Nice bruise' and punched me in the nuts. FML

#7766878
211 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11620) - you deserved it (45858)

On 02/01/2010 at 12:15am - love - by Liam. - Sent from mobile version

Today, my boyfriend admitted that he'd like to dress me in a squirrel suit and chase me through the forest. This was the surprising result of a discussion on how to spice up our love life. FML

#7753235
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26237) - you deserved it (4252)

On 01/31/2010 at 7:24pm - love - by JK (man) - United States (California)

Today, I realized what all the women I've been with have in common: Craigslist. FML

#7743505
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6738) - you deserved it (25150)

On 01/31/2010 at 12:42pm - love - by depr3ssed (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was watching a horror movie with my girlfriend. Suddenly, the killer jumped on screen. My girlfriend screamed. I peed myself. FML

#7736774
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32258) - you deserved it (12363)

On 01/31/2010 at 5:16am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, my girlfriend and I were in my basement. I play drums and guitar very well. My girlfriend bet me $50 that she could play better than me. I made the bet, but what I didn't know was that she had been taking both drum and guitar lessons since she was 5. I just lost $50. FML

#7732713
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7228) - you deserved it (39998)

On 01/31/2010 at 1:54am - love - by unknown - Sent from mobile version

Today, my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend bumped into me at McDonald's. I was sitting alone at a table with a big mac, two large fries, a large drink and 1 case of chicken nuggets. FML

#7732342
225 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21144) - you deserved it (32471)

On 01/31/2010 at 1:44am - love - by tammy999 (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I found out that my girlfriend had replaced our picture in her locket for a picture of Taylor Lautner shirtless. FML

#7724225
258 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33190) - you deserved it (5618)

On 01/30/2010 at 10:20pm - love - by Twilightsux (man) - United States

Today, I found out that my husband of five years was living a double life. He and his mistress have two children together and a third one on the way. He told me the only reason he stayed with me was for my money. I make about 8 dollars an hour and work two jobs to make ends meet. FML

#7721655
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44190) - you deserved it (2437)

On 01/30/2010 at 9:11pm - love - by pkz - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was stuck sitting at a cafeteria table next to the girl who broke my heart and her boyfriend. I got to overhear the conversation, which included "I want to go to the car" followed by "Me too, but I don't have a condom." FML

#7720142
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30894) - you deserved it (2913)

On 01/30/2010 at 8:35pm - love - by WishesWasDeaf (man) - United States (West Virginia)

Today, my boyfriend convinced me to skip school with him. His mom came home early. I had to hide in his closet and wait 6 hours for her to go to her book club meeting. FML

#7711945
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9958) - you deserved it (32978)

On 01/30/2010 at 3:55pm - love - by madgf - Sent from mobile version



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