Today, I went to my boyfriend's apartment to break up with him since he's always busy, and I haven't seen or spoke to him in almost 2 months. I arrived to find out from his landlord that he'd moved out 3 weeks ago, leaving a note saying that we were over. FML

by melikeyturtles / 11/02/2011 at 1:21am / United States / Love

Today, my fiancé decided he wants to buy an engagement ring for his mother, so that she doesn't feel left out. FML

by heatherjo / 11/02/2011 at 12:49am / United States / Love

Today, I was the 19th wheel at a party. Yes, I counted. FML

by Tom / 11/01/2011 at 1:01am / United States / Love

Today, my boyfriend admitted that the only reason he remembers my eye color is because it's the same shade of his shit after he's had a salad. FML

by poopcoloredeyes / 10/31/2011 at 4:06pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Love

Today, my husband's car was stolen from our driveway while he was out jogging. We'd recently had a huge fight, and he accused me of having done this to get revenge. I was at work all day, but it seems this doesn't make any difference to his dumb, paranoid ass. FML

by Anonymous / 10/31/2011 at 12:13pm / Singapore / Love

Today, I was using my boyfriend's phone to call my mom. A text message arrived from "Christina" that said, "Just put the kids to bed, come over." He swears they're only work buddies, but refuses to tell her he has a girlfriend, to avoid making things weird at work. We've been together two years. FML

by Beantown girl / 10/30/2011 at 8:58pm / United States / Love

Today, while in the grocery store my boyfriend said very loudly "Don't make me hit you in public again!" He says things like this every time we are in the grocery store line. The sad part is that it's better than when he says "Are you gonna pay for the stuff you put in your purse?" FML

by Anonymous / 10/30/2011 at 4:38am / United States (California) / Love

Today, I went to my husband's work to give him lunch. His assistant told me his "wife" was in his office. FML

by Anonymous / 10/30/2011 at 2:32am / Canada (Alberta) / Love

Today, my boyfriend clearly stated that I was "useless" when on my period. FML

by Anonymous / 10/30/2011 at 1:02am / United States / Love

Today, I was playing twister with my girlfriend at the school carnival. I jokingly squeeze her butt, only to find her mom standing right above us. FML

by Messiahman / 10/29/2011 at 9:31pm / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, my boyfriend confessed that he hates horror films. Our relationship was born out of our 'love' for horror films. I have endured 3 years of watching films that absolutely terrify me only to find out he doesn't like them either. FML

by duped / 10/29/2011 at 7:32am / United Kingdom (Warwickshire) / Love

Today, my boyfriend finally proposed to me. He was drunk and won't remember any of this tomorrow. FML

by cai / 10/29/2011 at 4:56am / United States / Love

Today, I tried sneaking over to my girlfriends house to be romantic and knocked on her window. She went and got her mother to see who was at the window. FML

by Anonymous / 10/29/2011 at 3:43am / United States / Love