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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Man or woman?

Today, during a dinner party, some friends brought up how sweet, innocent and caring they thought I was. I had to sit there as my drunk boyfriend cut them off and loudly argue that I was neither sweet nor innocent, and really nothing that special at all. FML

#14507444
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32091) - you deserved it (4383)

On 01/08/2011 at 11:01am - love - by Lily - United States (New York)

Today, I went to my boyfriend's house to meet his parents. Right when I arrived, his little sister said, "She's a lot fatter than you said!" FML

#14504548
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32275) - you deserved it (4767)

On 01/08/2011 at 1:38am - love - by Some Girl - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I went on a date for the first time in months. Over dessert, my date told a joke, and I tittered vigorously, causing me to choke and throw up all over my date. FML

#14499685
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29429) - you deserved it (6073)

On 01/07/2011 at 6:42pm - love - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I asked my boyfriend if my ass looked big in my new jeans. He looked, and then started singing "I like big butts and I cannot lie". FML

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me via text message. You would think he could at least spell my name right while ending our relationship. FML

#14494022
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34837) - you deserved it (3683)

On 01/07/2011 at 3:41am - love - by bunnyyy (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, for the first time ever, my boyfriend of one year told me he loved me. He was calling me by collect call from the county jail. FML

#14485086
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29791) - you deserved it (5975)

On 01/06/2011 at 12:38pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I changed my Facebook relationship status to "In a relationship". The girl is made up and the picture is from Google. FML

#14480016
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12912) - you deserved it (56703)

On 01/05/2011 at 10:35pm - love - by sadlife -

Today, I was talking to a really cute guy. He leaned closer and I thought he was going to kiss me. Instead, he leaned back, laughed and said, "Wow. You're growing a mustache." FML

#14469051
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32230) - you deserved it (7365)

On 01/04/2011 at 11:17pm - love - by anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend decided to re-enact a scene from Family Guy. He locked me in the car with him and farted deadly ones repeatedly. He wouldn't let me out until I learned to "love the gas." FML

#14463495
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41378) - you deserved it (7872)

On 01/04/2011 at 3:09pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Reserved

Today, my girlfriend dumped me for the tattoo artist who gave us our matching "love" tattoos. FML

#14456852
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33522) - you deserved it (9308)

On 01/03/2011 at 11:19pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I found out that my friend makes more money than I do. She's a high school dropout and working at a retail job at the mall. I went to college for four years to get my job. FML

#14450776
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32828) - you deserved it (4942)

On 01/03/2011 at 12:51pm - love - by This_Is_Me1982 - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I went for a drive with my boyfriend and his dad. His dad was kind enough to point out at every opportunity girls "that would be better for him than me". FML

#14449483
31 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29760) - you deserved it (2897)

On 01/03/2011 at 6:37am - love - by anon. (woman) - New Zealand (Waikato)

Today, I found out that my beautiful engagement ring is a remake of the late Princess Diana's engagement ring. I also found out my fiancé bought it from an infomercial, for $19.95. FML

#14447328
224 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35873) - you deserved it (7473)

On 01/03/2011 at 1:52am - love - by puggles (woman) - United States (Texas)



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