Today, it's my 7-year anniversary with my boyfriend. I was excited so I asked him what day it was and he said, "Wednesday?" FML

by Anonymous / 06/22/2016 at 6:13pm / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, I was trying to seduce a really good-looking girl, when all of a sudden she leaned in towards me and said, “Sorry, I’m not drunk enough to make out with you.“ FML

by Anonyme / 06/22/2016 at 1:15am / Switzerland (Geneve) / Love

Today, my parents, who aren’t usually lenient, allowed me to have my boyfriend over. We started to cuddle, things got a little heated, but then my sister walks in and says, “You do my math homework, or I tell mom what you guys were doing.” I don’t remember middle school math being this hard. FML

by Anonyme / 06/22/2016 at 12:05am / Love

Today, I broke up with my girlfriend for another girl. This other girl helped me break up with her so we could date. After it was all done, she promptly rejected me and in front of everyone, saying how much of a douche I was for leaving my girlfriend for another girl. FML

by hlewrn / 06/21/2016 at 9:52pm / United States (Virginia) / Love

Today, my girl and I got in a huge fight. Because I cuddled with her the wrong way. While I was asleep. FML

by Anonymous / 06/21/2016 at 7:24pm / United States (Georgia) / Love

Today, the guy I've been dating said we couldn't see each other anymore because he needed to focus on his career. He's unemployed. FML

by WorthLessThanACareer / 06/21/2016 at 8:57am / Love

Today, I flew to Germany to meet up with a girl that I met in America 5 months ago and fell in love with. We've been talking every day for 5 months straight. I get here just for her to tell me that she likes me "like a brother". FML.

by Xerfox / 06/20/2016 at 4:34pm / Germany (Baden-Wurttemberg) / Love

Today, I declared I was done with online dating after several disasters. My friend set me up with a friend of her husband's. Turns out he's one of the men who rejected me on the website. He laughed when he saw me and said, "Well, this is awkward" and left. FML

by Anonymous / 06/19/2016 at 4:06pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Love

Today, after a lifetime of being single, my parents finally found me a nice, intelligent, pretty girl. I was really excited, until she backed out on me when she found out our star signs don't match. FML

by mrtoolate / 06/19/2016 at 4:58am / India (Maharashtra) / Love

Today, I washed my boyfriend's work clothes, trying to make up for a fight we had earlier. After taking them out, I found his phone, wallet and keys at the bottom of the washer, completly waterlogged. This is not the peace offering I'd hoped for. FML

by bigbagofnope / 06/17/2016 at 4:17pm / United Kingdom / Love

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I broke up with my girlfriend. She was ecstatic. Apparently, she'd been trying to figure out how to break up with me for the past four months. FML

by Anonymous / 06/16/2016 at 11:00pm / Love

Today, the pizza delivery guy saw me in my underwear. My boyfriend is so ashamed of me that he pointed out to the guy twice that we were just roommates. FML

by Pouponette / 06/16/2016 at 7:07am / France / Love

Today, I broke up with my girlfriend. She was so angry, she stabbed me in the hand with a plastic fork. FML

by ouch / 06/16/2016 at 6:14am / United States (Michigan) / Love