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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Man or woman?

Today, my girlfriend of two years broke up with me because of the scratch marks on my back. I didn't have the nerve to tell her I tried to shower with the cat. FML

#21300928
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19107) - you deserved it (30702)

On 11/17/2014 at 7:56pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, my boyfriend broke the bed pretending to be a caterpillar. FML

#21300031
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28430) - you deserved it (3341)

On 11/16/2014 at 4:44am - love - by tine - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I asked my dad for advice. I recently got drunk and had a one-night stand. I feel terrible, because I'm engaged to a wonderful lady. My dad just said, "You did the right thing, son, keep it up. She's gonna steal half ya shit in the divorce anyway". FML

#21299758
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19732) - you deserved it (29343)

On 11/15/2014 at 7:04pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, on our second date, the unemployed guy I'm seeing tried to convince me to open a joint bank account in our name. FML

#21299619
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32787) - you deserved it (4501)

On 11/15/2014 at 2:58pm - love - by back to cock-hunting (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my girlfriend of over a year broke up with me via Facebook chat. When I asked her why, she replied "You know why." and blocked me. No, I don't know. FML

#21299125
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31826) - you deserved it (2556)

On 11/14/2014 at 7:11pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I found out one of my girlfriend's recent Google searches was, "should I admit to cheating or just dump him?" FML

#21299071
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32694) - you deserved it (2207)

On 11/14/2014 at 5:36pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom

Today, my wife and I had an argument serious enough to end our marriage, while overseas on vacation, with my whole family present. Three more days of awkward tension until we get to fly home and it all ends. FML

#21298977
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31550) - you deserved it (3190)

On 11/14/2014 at 2:09pm - love - by overseasbummer - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend of 5 years. She bitched me out for not getting the ring she had been "hinting" me to get, and angrily left. FML

#21298350
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36795) - you deserved it (4510)

On 11/13/2014 at 1:50pm - love - by Anonymous - South Africa (Western Cape)

Today, my boyfriend bought us plane tickets to Mexico for our "Honeymoon". This would be nice if he had proposed and if we'd been dating for longer than 2 weeks. FML

#21297437
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34630) - you deserved it (3276)

On 11/12/2014 at 12:21am - love - by anonymous - United States (Minnesota)

Today, my boyfriend of four years broke up with me over some rumors he heard about me. These rumors are from high-school, seven years ago. FML

#21297338
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34335) - you deserved it (2950)

On 11/11/2014 at 10:31pm - love - by ugh - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I realized why I never hear my voice echoing when I sing to my boyfriend on Skype; he just mutes me. FML

#21296304
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33104) - you deserved it (10032)

On 11/10/2014 at 4:50pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I thought I felt my cellphone vibrating. Turned out it was just my girlfriend letting out a vicious fart against my leg. FML

#21296102
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36076) - you deserved it (5365)

On 11/10/2014 at 9:28am - love - by Anonymous (man) - Germany (Berlin)

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me via Twitter. FML

#21295236
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33180) - you deserved it (3232)

On 11/09/2014 at 3:37am - love - by Anonymous - Australia (Queensland)



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