Today, my father contacted me for the first time in years to ask about my upcoming wedding and possibly walking me down the aisle. He claimed the only reason he left was because he thought I'd be gay. I am. FML

by Anonymous / 01/12/2016 at 4:03pm / United States (Tennessee) / Love

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. Whilst browsing the web, I clicked on an ad that said "How to Get Your Ex Back in a Day". Now I am single and have a computer virus. FML

by lonely / 01/11/2016 at 4:04pm / United States (Idaho) / Love

Today, I found out that my crush of a few years likes me. How? Her boyfriend told me, followed by a punch in the face. FML

by anon / 01/11/2016 at 12:21pm / United States (New York) / Love

Today, the guy I made out with on New Year's Eve finally called me. Too bad it was to blame me for the picture of us which someone had sent to his girlfriend. I never took a picture, and had no idea he was in a relationship. FML

by CharlieKearney / 01/10/2016 at 6:33pm / Sweden (Stockholms Lan) / Love

Today, I texted the girl I'm going to homecoming with in a couple days to say hi. The conversation started OK, but then morphed into her saying that she doesn't feel anything between us, and wants to stop being friends after the dance. I have to buy her dinner and a ticket, out of my own wallet. FML

by BURGERT0WN USA / 01/10/2016 at 2:46pm / United States (Washington) / Love

Today, after dating my girlfriend for a while, I had a realization. She often says things like, "You're my favorite!" and scratches my beard, which I appreciated affectionately. Upon meeting her pets, it dawned on me that I am just another one of her cats. FML

by Jack / 01/09/2016 at 9:07pm / United States (Minnesota) / Love

Today, I spent nearly an hour trying to take a decent photo for my dating site profile. Not 20 minutes after uploading it, I got a message saying "Srsly dude stop trying, u look like Rosie O'Donnell." FML

by Anonymous / 01/09/2016 at 12:38am / United States (Ohio) / Love

Today, I played charades with my girlfriend and her family. When it was her turn to act out a phrase, she simply walked to the center of the room and pointed to herself and then at me. It took less than 5 seconds for someone to correctly guess "Beauty and the Beast". FML

by fuglymug / 01/08/2016 at 4:48pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Love

Today, I now accept how stupid I was to marry a man whose plans for the future all start with "When I win the lottery..." FML

by Anonymous / 01/08/2016 at 12:38pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love

Today, I tried asking a guy I like on a date. He turned me down, saying that I "seem like a nice person and all", but after seeing those reality shows on truTV, he "would rather not date a Russian. No offense, though." FML

by vanilla_blossom / 01/05/2016 at 1:49pm / United States (New Jersey) / Love

Today, this beautiful girl that I've known for a long time told me that she just can't date me anymore because I remind her too much of her cat. FML

by Anonymous / 01/04/2016 at 10:14am / United States (Georgia) / Love

Today, my boyfriend was so drunk at a New Years party that he approached me and asked me who I was. FML

by anon / 01/02/2016 at 10:57am / Australia (New South Wales) / Love

Today, I celebrated my 4-year anniversary with my girlfriend. We didn't have sex and we didn't even kiss. All I got to do was cuddle the stuffed Minion she got me for Christmas. FML

by no love / 01/01/2016 at 5:41pm / United States / Love