Today, I spent most of my morning comforting the guy I love because his fiance dumped him for some other guy. He continuously told me I had no clue that kind of pain he was in. He dumped me three years ago for the girl that just left him. FML
I agree, your life sucks (42026) - you totally deserved it (5351)
On 07/10/2009 at 6:28pm - love - by Shadowfigure23 (woman) - United States (California)
better yet, why are you comforting that ungrateful bastard? Tell him he's getting a taste of his own medicine.
She seems quite desperate, and deserves all the pain he makes her go through if she just takes it.
#24 - On 07/10/2009 at 8:03pm by genius_man16
#3, how is he an ungrateful bastard?
He thought that the OP and him woulden't work apparently, so he broke up with her.
Atleast he didn't cheat, like a number of guys do. He didn't think they would work, doesen't make him an ungrateful bastard. And maybe he didn't know that she still had feelings for him?
YDI for....not getting over it after three years, deciding to comfort him for karma, and assuming that your dumping is the equivalent to his fiancee dumping him.
You're all self righteous idiots.
You don't control your feelings towards someone. You can sit there feeling happy about yourselves but you have no idea if you some day will be in the same situation feeling the same pain.
#72 - On 07/10/2009 at 10:26pm by TysonFawlay
If you remain in love with somebody for three years after they've dumped you...you clearly haven't been trying hard enough to get over them. Yes, it is her fault.
trading up is as good as cheating because you have to establish the new relationship while you're still with your current partner. and you can't control your feelings towards someone - what you CAN change is your actions. tolerating him saying you just don't understand his pain is a dick move. OP, you should have slapped that self-absorbed prick down so he'd stop being such a "nobody knows what it's like to be me" emo douchebag. you get as good as you give. and as long as you're holding his hand through all his selfish faggotry he's not going to change
#84 - On 07/10/2009 at 11:33pm by harlehatschi
Really, she just needs to get over him and find new friends. That's it. There should be no slapping involved... hell, there should even be no COMFORTING involved. She should have dropped him like a rock when he dumped her and found somebody else.
She definitely deserves this.
#91 - On 07/11/2009 at 12:36am by onigiriqueen
That's exactly what I was wondering as I read this fake FML!
#147 - On 07/11/2009 at 6:00pm by xo_emily_xo
That's not the point , though. She went through the same thing when he broke up with her. Yet, he's telling her that she couldn't understand the pain of breakup. He's a douche for being so selfish (yes, even when he's upset).
Yeah, why do you feel feelings still? What's up with that?
#168 - On 07/14/2009 at 3:32pm by FoundManyLemons
sounds to me like he got what he deserved.
not really an FML to you
#5 - On 07/10/2009 at 7:31pm by justbea777
I agree, and he doesn't deserve you. You know exactly how he feels, probably worse in a way.
I'm sorry you still love him though. It's hard.
#15 - On 07/10/2009 at 7:47pm by redbluegreen
I feel so sorry for you. if you can't forget him after three years, fuck your life. I hope you get another chance or you'll be able to get over it.
Karma, tell him to get over it and walk away.
You deserve someone better.
#14 - On 07/10/2009 at 7:47pm by DearGravity
And that's when you tell him something like "Yes I do understand you self-centred son of a bitch". And leave him alone. Not doing so is disrespecting yourself. And if you don't respect yourself, neither will he.
Why did the comforting responses get buried? I don't understand people sometimes.
I know how it feels. *hugs*
#17 - On 07/10/2009 at 7:51pm by Lonely_Lez
let me guess, she not over him, that why she comfort him after he broke up with her and went with the girl that left him, that just stupid!
Get together with the guy his fiancee dumped him for to complete the circle.
#19 - On 07/10/2009 at 7:52pm by I_Deserved_It
the fact that he keeps saying it, implys he wants u to bring up ur history and possibly even give him a window to ask u out again
#21 - On 07/10/2009 at 7:54pm by Bex_dazzled
This is pretty much your chance to tell him how you feel and possibly win him back.
#28 - On 07/10/2009 at 8:08pm by The_Seeker
lol and your comforting him ydi for being pathetic i dont vote on these things so i didnt put ydi but im just saying ydi for being there for a shallow two faced scumbag... he deserved it two times over and you do too for not standing up and letting him know hey now you know how i feel when you left me!
#29 - On 07/10/2009 at 8:10pm by ithedarkknight
Well, obviously he has a terrible memory then. He deserves it, but so do you.
#30 - On 07/10/2009 at 8:11pm by donner1423
i feel so bad for you. it's almost as if he's trying to bait you. unless he never knew how much he hurt you...
You're a really nice person for comforting him after what he did. Either that or you're really dumb.
Give him a great big hug, a soft kiss on the cheek, and stare into his eyes as you tell him how much karma is a BITCH!!!!
#41 - On 07/10/2009 at 8:45pm by MadamOracle
I was in a similar situation a while ago. My girlfriend dumped me and she got together with one of my friends within 2 days. They decided not to tell me but I found out pretty quickly anyway. For good reason I was pretty pissed at her, however I decided not to be a jackass about it. After about 2 weeks he dumped her and she came to me for comfort. She was sad but I still reminded her that I didn't like what she had done, but when I did she got mad and acted like I was just trying to make her feel like shit.
#42 - On 07/10/2009 at 8:51pm by Tubasaurus
Ugh! I can't stand people who do something wrong then act all indignant and victimised when the wronged party points it out at totally appropriate times - "Oh, stop trying to make me feel guilty/what's done is done/let it go/some other dismissive bullshit designed to dodge a guilty conscience rather than just accepting they are shitty human beings".
< / rant >
Your ex is a fucking whore, end of story. FYL, Tubasaurus!
#119 - On 07/11/2009 at 4:18am by judgeymcjudge
that's sad. maybe u 2 should get back 2gether when he's not in pain nemore.
#43 - On 07/10/2009 at 9:03pm by ChicPenguin
I'm gonna go with YDI on this one, simply cause of the fact that he dumped you a long time ago and you're still talking to him. Not to mention you're COMFORTING the bastard. You should stay away from him and learn the difference between being nice and being true to yourself. 'Nuff said.
#44 - On 07/10/2009 at 9:03pm by cutebebe778
You should dump the trash from your life and move on to new and better things.
#46 - On 07/10/2009 at 9:11pm by GatorBites
Staying friends with an ex is one thing, but you've spent the past 3 years harboring feelings for someone that didn't want you. And if that wasn't bad enough, the only thing this guy sounds deserving of is a swift kick in the ass -- not your time or comfort. No matter what he's going through right now, this guy should be begging you for forgiveness because he should be able to finally see what he put you through; not acting like some unique and beautiful snowflake that no one else could possibly relate to, least of all you.
YDI, because while this guy is a jerk to you, it's only because you've allowed him to be. I really hope the fact that you posted this here means that you realize all of this now and won't be tolerating any more of his bs.
#49 - On 07/10/2009 at 9:20pm by vaguereference
I totally agree with #49. I would have said it slightly sweeter lol but maybe tough love is what you need. I get that everyone reacts to pain differently, But three years its a LONG time. Eventually you should have realized that he was never going to get back with you.And I sure hope you didn't blow off guys waiting for your ex. If he's saying that you don't know how it feels,then he didn't think much of your guys' relationship.So I don't think this is an FML because even though it hurts this is the best for you. You can move on now.
Technically, you DON'T know how he feels. Were you and him about to get married and he dumped you at the last minute? Nahh
finally! i had to read 50 comments before someone finally said what should be said! you can't exactly say you know what it feels like to be dumped by the person you're going to MARRY! stop being a drama queen and get over it.
well said #50
#82 - On 07/10/2009 at 11:23pm by hannahleigh
Because she said he dumped her 3 years ago and not "broke off their engagement 3 years ago" or something similar...
#128 - On 07/11/2009 at 5:57am by Puolukka
You can't judge a person's level of feelings just from that. Just because they were planning to marry, it makes them more in love? Apparently not, seeing as how the fiance left.
YDI. Why are you still talking to him 3 years later, nevermind still "loving" him? This FML should have never even been allowed to happen.
Get the hell away from him. He's too self-centered. Find someone worth your time!
#52 - On 07/10/2009 at 9:26pm by 110879
wow....your really that stupid huh? well, ok. fuck your life.
#55 - On 07/10/2009 at 9:34pm by macc55
You've spent 3 years mooning over a man who cheated on you with this girl, then has the audacity to accept your comfort for hours today?
Read what everyone is telling you. He's not good for you, walk away. But that still won't solve the riddle of why you have so much low self-esteem, that you would do this to yourself. Solve that, first, because you can't walk away from yourself.
hw didn't cheat. we were still in high school. we dated for four years and my first. i have dated other guys, tried to forget him, not talked to him for a while, tried being just a friend, live 500 miles from him and told him it was what i felt...he still thinks i dont know how he feels...im actually starting to agree with YDI...
#158 - On 07/12/2009 at 2:23am by Shadowfigure23
ummm i kno u thought u were being a "good samaritan' by comforting the one person who hurt u the most, but in this case, i'm gonna have to say YDI because u decided to actually waste time listening to this fools sob story. SMH, some people never learn....
#58 - On 07/10/2009 at 9:39pm by whoaa_nellie
maybe you should have told him and maybe you should have a little pride, it's not fair to you to be there for him.
Well, my ex and I are still really close friends. So, if you guys were still close friends after he dumped you, then I could understand you comforting him. But, I would've told him that you do have a clue what he's going through. And tell him how.
#63 - On 07/10/2009 at 9:55pm by theoceanscool
You are obviously a good person. To still be there for someone who hurt you so bad makes you the better better. For that reason, he does not deserve you at all! Your life is fucked, because you still love someone that hurt, and not because of what he said. I can only hope, and pray that you will be able to move forward in your life. Leave him behind, and find someone who can truly appreciate you.
KARMA IS A BITCH! And I hope you laughed quietly at his pain while he cried about his sob story to you and then said you wouldn't understand.
#66 - On 07/10/2009 at 10:06pm by sashafierce123
Don't want to say YDI because no one deserves to have such strong unrequited feelings for someone else, but I do think it really is time to let go of your feelings and move on. Someone selfish enough to whine to you about this after dumping you for the person that he got dumped by is not worth the time or effort it takes to care that deeply. Realize that you're worth more and that karma caught up with him in the end. There are better men out there that will appreciate the loyalty, kindness, and dedication you've shown this shmuck that broke your heart. MOVE ON DARLIN'!
Yeah, YDI for still hanging around a guy who dumped you for another girl three years ago.
Try this: google "how do I develop self-respect" and then follow whatever instructions you find.
FML for him leaving you but i have to give you a fat YDI after spending that time over his worthless being even after what he had done to you. thats your fault, should have told him karma's a bitch and left.
#69 - On 07/10/2009 at 10:11pm by pianoangel00
I know exactly how you feel I just spent the past 3 hours comforting my ex that I still have feelings for because his fiance just left him. (maybe its the same guy who knows) but I feel your pain completely.
#70 - On 07/10/2009 at 10:17pm by Paranoidfruit
Why the hell are you wasting you time with such an asshole....you should have left right when he said that
You're better off without him. Trust me.
My ex did the same thing to me. He married the chick he left me for and she ended up cheating on him not even 5 months in to their marriage. I got a call from Ft. Hood a week later. I talked him through it, hung up, and laughed. Kinda bitter, I know, but it still makes you feel better to know that the prick knows exactly what you went through.
You'll get through though, and will come out a stronger person, I promise.
#76 - On 07/10/2009 at 10:47pm by hot_mess88
I respect you a LOT. It sucks what he did to you, it was rude, hurtful, and you shouldn't have to put up with it any longer. You deserve a lot better, and should move on. But, for you to be strong enough to stick through this with him, your a really loyal friend. I think you should move on, and find someone else. Find someone that will love you for you, and want to be with just you. :]
Wow. It sounds like you rose above well. I'm sorry though, FYL for sure.
#78 - On 07/10/2009 at 10:53pm by McLaughlane
i'm sorry. :/ *hugs*
he's so ignorant and oblivious to the fact that what's been done to him he had done to you. ~_~
I only said YDI because you were comforting a guy who treats you lime shit. you let the guy you love talk to you and treat you like that? move on...
#87 - On 07/11/2009 at 12:01am by littlemisslee
Haha wow, your a better person then i am, i would have done the happy dance in his face while in a bikini, just to let him know he isnt touching this ever again :P
#93 - On 07/11/2009 at 12:42am by jd_superjive
The only thing I have to say is that they were ready to get married. He actually thought that they were going to spend the rest of their lives together. While I agree that you had your heart broken, I'm sure that there was no marriage on the horizon. Which means, that the heartbreak that he's experiencing would be stronger.
#94 - On 07/11/2009 at 12:43am by memyselfandi
For the people that are saying he's trying to get you to bring it up so he can ask you out, if that's true then the OP should do anything but that. It would be clear as day that he'd just be using her as a fall back until he finds someone he likes better. Trust me OP, unless there are circumstances that make you certain this isn't true, getting back with him will only bring more heart break. It's too coincidental. I'm sorry you still love him.
#95 - On 07/11/2009 at 12:59am by FuzzyWalnuts
Ummm ok so that just means he's upset, guys say alot of things when they are upset without thinking them through, if you still love him, keep comforting him, take it slow and try to win back his heart
#97 - On 07/11/2009 at 1:11am by emovampire
hmmmm a FIANCE dumping you is a fuckton more important than just a boy dumping you.
calm your shit you fucking whiner.
planning to spend the rest of your life with someone and feeling secure with them only for them to be a tramp and leave you is fucking bullshit, what you went through is life.
get over yourself.
#101 - On 07/11/2009 at 1:52am by guitardedman
You don't know that! The OP could have been dating him for a long time and you don't know what the guy and the other girl's relationship was like! Hell, OP could have been dating him long enough to think that they WERE going to get married or maybe even they didn't want to get married but thought they'd stay together! She very well could have been feeling EXACTLY what this guy is feeling!!!
The real FML here is that you comfort the guy that broke up with you three years ago?! That was more of a FHL in the context you wrote it.
#104 - On 07/11/2009 at 2:01am by pleasedonttellme
Fyl for it taking all morning that's about it get over the rest.
#106 - On 07/11/2009 at 2:37am by heavenandhell
Aw, that sucks! But still.. why are you comforting him? YDI...
#107 - On 07/11/2009 at 2:37am by fam0usco0kies16
Touché.
I'm so sorry OP. ):
I think it's more painful for you than it is to him.
#109 - On 07/11/2009 at 3:02am by wingedspiritus
OP, i had the same thing happen to me, but with a few different minor circumstances. and it SUCKED hearing him tell me that i could never understand the pain he was going through. im so sorry that this happened to you! yeah, you should get over him, but i totally understand how hard it is to get over someone who you truly love, especially if you still remain close friends with them.
#110 - On 07/11/2009 at 3:11am by Miss_delaney
Why the hell have you kept this loser in your life?? I can't believe he said something like that to you. I'm also a little surprised that you let him. I think you need to let him go and move on. It's not going to happen, and if it did, you'd be miserable with someone who could actually say something that stupid to you!
this OP is Awesome
he accully repilies
so where was your friend again?
in front of his home?
#113 - On 07/11/2009 at 3:17am by Failurewithacapi
I hope your over this by now, he obviously doesn't deserve you. Really, if you did marry him, he'd do worse than break your heart once.
OP, you have to realise that he must obviously know how you feel about him - to have been able to treat you that way and still come to you in a situation like this? He's gotta know you still worship the ground he walks on, and he's most likely milking it for all it's worth. I realise that it must be awfully tempting, but don't let him use you as his emotional stepping stone here. Don't let him use your love for him to temper his own heartache and misery. I won't go so far as to say YDI, because I know you can't help who you love and having him cling to you must be a kind of temporary asylum, but you shouldn't knowingly let him use you that way - especially now he's proven himself to be, beyond any doubt, a self-involved fuckhead with absolutely no ability to see beyond his own shittiness. FYL indeed.
#122 - On 07/11/2009 at 4:29am by judgeymcjudge
I hope for your sake you're over him by now. It sounds like he is a jerk who can't see beyond the tip of his nose since he doesn't "remember" the pain he caused you when he left you. Please for your own sake don't get involved with him.
#124 - On 07/11/2009 at 4:34am by Lisasimpsonfan
This is probably fake because no one is that much of a dumbass. I think the guy would remember he dumped op for a girl.
sorry, truely and sincerly. l hate "love". its a stupid painful un caring whore.
also you get what yer giving, and lm sure by saying this it makes you sad or mad or something but its a lil true so, fuck him. shitface needs to open his eyes and take a look at peeple around him.
#129 - On 07/11/2009 at 6:20am by nightswimmer
it was gud of u to comfort him, but i think he deserved dat. "u never leave da one u love for da one u like, becuz da one u like will leave u for da one they love."
he broke dat rule
#133 - On 07/11/2009 at 9:56am by i_heart_yew
That's one hell of a complex love circle. YDI for remaining involved in such petty drama, and for still "loving" the dick, and for comforting him.
#135 - On 07/11/2009 at 10:55am by jmgirl
I don't like to generalize, but your the type of woman "that understands everything"
You understand all his problem, even realize why he left you. You tread carefully to not to cause him problems than he's already having. Which is a mistake in itself, since he needs to deal with the problems in his life.
The path you are going to down is only going to lead him to leave you again, and you'll reach a point where you're just left wondering whatever happened to your life. Break free of him and move on with your life.
#137 - On 07/11/2009 at 11:46am by BoboMatrix
I agree with this 100%. I did this with my husband for years, not about our relationship but about all of his addiction problems and so forth. I thought he just needed someone to believe in him, but all he did was take advantage of me. No more. I will always love him, but I expect him to grow up and prove himself if he wants me to trust him again.
#150 - On 07/11/2009 at 6:14pm by FreedomFirst
You clearly can't be friends with him. Being friends is preventing you from getting over him.
#140 - On 07/11/2009 at 1:08pm by happyvalleygirl
That's good for him. I would have said "actually I do know how you feel, you did it to me. Now you know how I felt. Isn't it funny how things work out. Oh karma." :)
#160 - On 07/12/2009 at 3:28am by BadLuckCharmer
Well he sounda alot like an ignorant hypocritical retard? Yu should atleast b happy karma ripped him a new asshole!
#142 - On 07/11/2009 at 1:40pm by YungMarlon23
YOU DESERVE IT it was your choice to comfort him dumbass so dont bitch about it. you should have learned after he dumped you for her.
you leave him on his own and eat a hell of a lot of ben and jerrys if he meant that much to you.
#144 - On 07/11/2009 at 4:26pm by MegaPopTart
YDI for letting him make you a doormat. He is a creep, an ass, a jerk, a waste. Don't comfort him, and ESPECIALLY don't let him tell you "you don't know how I feel." I would throw that right in his face about him leaving you three years ago. Does he think he has a monopoly on emotional pain? Ugh!
#149 - On 07/11/2009 at 6:11pm by FreedomFirst
To all those saying that she deserves it for still loving him after three years, clearly you have never truly been in love before. It's not like she could decide to just stop loving him, it doesn't work like that. Although YDI for letting the selfish douche to cry on your shoulder. I mean, clearly he doesn't care about your feelings if he thinks that you don't understand what he is going through...granted, he was marrying the girl...
#153 - On 07/11/2009 at 8:09pm by elegance4290
wow i'm sorry but you need to let go, you're probably torturing yourself
#159 - On 07/12/2009 at 2:25am by ghostgirll
I'm not going to bash him for breaking up with you, (he might have had a legitimate reason) but you don't go to your ex for comforting! He's an idiot.
#161 - On 07/12/2009 at 9:26am by mrpastry909
wow, i would have just been like.. "oh really? ur hurting? well guess what? u ahole thats what u did"
#164 - On 07/12/2009 at 10:00pm by xxsmilingclover
I wonder if he said this to you early on or at the end of the comforting... because I would've smacked him upside the head if he said it at the beginning. You might be a nice person, but he deserves to be treated like shit if he's gonna do the same to you.
WOW you know what you should be laughin at him because it's not a FML moment for you but for him...and he deserved it for doing that to you...
#167 - On 07/13/2009 at 3:44am by callmema14
I agree that he deserves everything he got for doing it to you. But as for all the people downing you...they can stfu. I know exactly what your going through and what its like to be in your shoes cuz I'm going through the same thing--except my ex's new girl n him haven't broken up yet. But when you fall in love with someone you love that person no matter what. No matter how badly they hurt you...so all of you putting her down n calling her stupid obviously don't know what it is to fall in love. But like you, I really hope my ex gets his own--hope she leaves him nasty n cold.
#171 - On 08/01/2009 at 10:22pm by Ariana0824
bummer..that happened to me..sorta. sucked ass. the girl he off and on dated for almost a year was such a bitch and made him feel like nothing..then i always had to comfort him.
